Is it normal to be married and worried about the future?

[Anonymous]

We been married for a while but he just returned from overseas. Also there are changes happening in our lives. It scares us about our future. So many people getting divorced and it scares us. These days it’s difficult to not see the future. We love each other deeply. It’s the transition from overseas to here

Just have faith

Have communication deeply

[Cormac995]

The correct answer is both. You need to have faith in your love, or it will die in the insecurity, but you also have to communicate with your SO about all things this important. If you love him and your scared tell him and explain why your scared and how much you love him. I understand your concerns about divorce, but do you know what caused every divorce I've ever seen? One or both of them stopped trying. They treated marriage like it was the end and it's smooth sailing, but marriage is hard work.

Most marriages end because one or both of them are too selfish to compromise and that will always lead to a bad marriage. Nobody will ever get along 100% of the time marriage is there to remind you that the bond goes beyond moments of discomfort and times where you are lonely or angry with them.

If you're worried about divorce or something going wrong I do have some good news for you about preserving the bond, It's easy just keep trying. Keep going on dates, keep having nights out, keep having sex keep cuddling, keep making time for each other. The big mistake couples make is they think once they're married it's all smooth sailing and it's not.

Love requires patience, compromise, hard work and daily maintenance. As long as you guys keep putting in as much work to stay in love as you both did to fall in love you'll be just fine.

[Cormac995]

Thanks for MHO

[Asker]

you welcome

[Finchie40]

Yes , because we can’t predict the future , just have faith , but focus on what’s in front of you now and do what makes you happy the most , Love your husband the same way you want to be loved in return , don’t worry about anyone else , people divorce because they worry about everyone else , and what other people doing , thinking they are missing out on things when really they aren’t. People divorce because they are selfish, and think grass is greener on the other side. If things aren’t great where you are standing , water
The grass underneath you instead and focus on what you already have. It sounds like you and your husband love each other , so spend more time with your husband , plan some romantic getaways , have more sex , go try something you both never tried before. Live your life for the moment because tomorrow is not promised whatsoever , it’s
Ok to prepare for the future but not ok to dwell on the future

[AI Opinion]

Being a relationship coach, I’d say it's absolutely normal to feel worried about the future, especially with such big transitions. Lovebirds like you often face anxiety due to changes and uncertainties. Just keep communicating openly and remind yourselves of the love that brought you together. Marriage isn't always a fairytale, but with deep love and commitment, you're writing your own story. Keep that spark alive, and remember, transitions can bring you even closer! 🥰✨

[Anonymous]

This is a really old book but still very helpful:

Here's the book (pdf):

https://ia800207.us.archive.org/15/items/Carnagie/Carnagie.pdf

Here's a video summary of the book (12 min.):

https://www.youtube.com/embed/IC9OTzmMsz0

This is not from the book, but still helpful:

[Asker]

Thank you so much

[Nikki1989]

Negative people will constantly look for negativity. Not many people on here talk about all the millions of successful marriages out there. Change your mindset and you will be fine.

Remember, misery loves company.

[Asker]

Thank you and yes it’s negative people around me!

[Geo1970]

Not that I have been married, but inevitably due to the trials and tribulations of life, certain things that have reiterated themselves once again, or we are encountering brand-new tests that will challenge us as to how we overcome these new worry’s in our relationship, will of course install worries.


Such as:
The possibility of redundancy at work,
The birth of a new baby and the need of reassurance that all will happen without complications.
The passing of a close and very much loved relative.
Overcoming disagreements,


The list, unfortunately is endless!


I hope that any couples, Male and Female, Female and Female, Male and Male and LGBTQ encounter fewer worries in their happiness together.

[Caroline91]

Change can be scary. In stressful times good communication is more important than ever. Don’t hide what you’re feeling but, also, don’t dwell on it because that creates a negative environment. Maybe take sometime to reconfirm your commitment to each other because a solid, unshakable commitment on each of your parts is what will carry you through. Remember, the two of you, together, can figure it all out. And one step at a time, you will get to the other side.

[BCRanger10]

Okay, so a lot of people are getting divorced. And? You and your husband are not "a lot of people". You are two in one flesh. Statistics don't make decisions. People do. So make good decisions.

[236color]

It's normal to be scared of the future period, married or single. People are nostalgic for "the good old days", not because they were better, but because they were kids and didn't know how scary was. I'm sure my parents were scared shirtless during the Cuban missile crisis. I was clueless, I was 4 years old. Now I have to take a break from news cause it freaks me out.

[Lliam]

It has always been normal for couples to worry about the future. That's just part of life.

[andreasderjuengere]

It's not longer normal to be married. It also is not longer normal to think about the future.

[jahaims]

Why would other people's lives going to shit mean yours will

[Anonymous]

It’s normal. Faith and communication are both really important.

[Anonymous]

You sound like you both feel the same?


But in reality each person is different

[Opinion Owner]

Maybe you got a fright when friends split up?

And now you're both asking yourselves, separately, are things better if we separate?

[beenherebefore]

I think this is pretty common.

[MrChinaski]

What is your concern?

[blackeagle007]

You seem like a female

[Anonymous]

You'll be divorced within 3 years not even

[Anonymous]

No it is abnormal