Do you think most younger men look forward to being a father?

Question

I never had children, so my experience is limited to observations of friends. Most young boys - 18-23 - are not eager to become a father, but I think between 23 and 25, guys start thinking more about planning their future and not simply living for the moment. As part of that change, I think most men embrace the idea of becoming a father. . . when they meet the right woman, of course.

Guys, was this true for you. Girls, do you think men are preparing for fatherhood by their mid-twenties?

Xoxocutekitty · Accepted Answer

A lot of urban men (and women) in their twenties before age 25 find it hard to commit to one job or career path, let alone a healthy relationship. I think men want to be fathers, yet outside of " getting financially prepared," few men proactively do the work to actually be different than the dads they had. Key word proactively. Hint

Through their partners pregnancy and seeing their peers go through the journey first, I think they become educated and involved, but quite rarely do you see young men uphold the skills of early parenthood, rather they wait until it happens and react to how well their spouse handles the transition and does what is asked.

Personally, I have never met in his twenties who has said, "I want to be a father to "feed a bottle to a baby, pick out clothes with/for my kid, or see them smile for the first time." It's always, "I want a kid I can teach my hobbies to, who can do [insert activity] with me, or who can do [insert chore] for me."

Just my two cents.

DishLady · Accepted Answer

Some guys have always looked forward to being “their dad” which entails fatherhood (or mentoring or youth if they’re unable to have kids of their own for whatever reason), while others have an aversion to the very notion of having children around them. 🤷🏻‍♀️

molonski2 · Accepted Answer

Honestly I loved being a father for first time at 28 .

Now , I'd absolutely love to be a father again ( and would be so good at it now ) , but I can't.

I had a vasectomy at age 30 , and to be honest that's just as well for both my networth and all the children I would have had , without really trying.

But , I take your point that society has singled out young men , made them seem like villains and the entire system is against them , it's certainly anti man , no doubt about it.

HawkPerception · Accepted Answer

I can't speak on behalf of all men, but I personally have always known I've wanted a family. Honestly, I envisioned myself being married with children at the age I am now. But life doesn't always go as you envision it, as we all know. I still hope one day I'm lucky enough to have that. However, I still haven't lived enough or done the things I've wanted to, so I'd be okay to wait a bit longer.

Apple1996 · Answer

My husband always knew he wanted kids young. We had our first when he was 17 and he was very happy about it

Avicenna · Answer

I didn’t become a father until I was 37, and it was not planned. I wasn’t opposed to it, but didn’t really think about it before then. However, I’m glad I became a parent and wish I had at a much younger age (like 22).

midnightmoon05 · Answer

Those who are raised from happy healthy families do.
my son is 16. When he was around 6-7 years old, I told him he has an important duty when he grows up. He needs to continue daddy’s blood line since dad is an only child.
At 15, while we were at a cruise, he said he wants a big family like us. He wouldn’t mind starting young and I told him, I will help.
my two nephews, 23, and 21, both want kids. But not sure how to raise kids. So we have these discussions sometimes.
on gag, I read a lot do and a lot don’t.
I don’t know all their reasons. Some think it’s too expensive. Some think this is not a good world to bring kids in. So I am guessing they have some negative feelings about having kids.

Crimsyjo · Answer

I can concur with your observation although I'm not a man so gave no proof as such. I just know as a woman I didn't want kids until around that age (23+) because yes my husband and I had money and worked and travelled a lot but it was that age when I started to feel empty and "what next" - I can imagine it's common to wonder at the purpose of life if you have a partner (otherwise the purpose IS to get a partner). It's probably biology or hormones at play. I certainly regret having kids. But at the time it was so so important to me.

lyrem04 · Answer

I always wonder this too I wonder if men desire children just as much as some women do… like me I knew I wanted to be a mom since I was 12 I don't know maybe it’s bc we’re more with our moms and we admire how they are with us but then again so are boys with their dad’s … or maybe it’s bc we carry children I don't know but I have never heard of a man desiring a child outside of being in a relationship only seen when they are in one and when they have one alr… 🤷🏾‍♀️🤔

Likes2drive · Answer

When I was in my late 20s assuming I found the right woman, I did desire to have about two kids. It wasn’t until I was 31 and got with my now ex wife who already had two boys that I wanted to have at least one child of my own with her and ended up having 3 girls at once 😊, now they are 25 years old and doing better than me

Twalli · Answer

I decided at 16 not to ever procreate. As I was single for the next decade (and I don't do one night stands) as well as not having a girlfriend at that time, I didn't do anything to prevent it. After 6 months with my girlfriend and knowing she wanted kids as much as ai did (not at all), I got a vascetomy.

SotiCoto · Answer

I'll put it this way: I have spawned. I have a now adult daughter.
I played very little part in her life. Mostly just sent money to the ex-wife over the years.
I never had any intention of breeding, but my ex-wife really wanted to be a mother and I didn't particularly see any reason to fight her over it. Since then there have been a few times when I regretted it, when I figured maybe I should have resisted a bit more vehemently. But ultimately what was done is in the past and there is no changing it.
I've not done it again since, and never would again. Actually wanting to breed is brain-rot.

NathanDavis · Answer

definitely not... times have changed and most guys between 23 and 25, are not seriously yet, considering to have children

most of them are still trying to cement a path... towards the possibility of a marriage first, then a family

Anonymous · Answer

Nope. Younger men are enjoying their lives instead of dealing with children. By the way, if a man is between 20-29 years old, he can still have children, but if possible, men in their 40s or 50s should not have children. Because they look more like grandfathers than fathers next to the child. The reproduction of older men is nothing more than ego satisfaction.

Anonymous · Answer

Hard to say. I know my father always did. I never felt that way when I was younger. I was opposed to kids. But I viewed it as a pecking order. I can't think about children if I'm not even married. And I can't think about being married if I'm not even dating.

So I guess my answer is kind of that line from the movie Juno. That it's kind of like, "a woman becomes a mother when she gets pregnant, and a man becomes a father when he first sees his child". Before then, I don't think most guys are thinking much about it.

exitseven · Answer

I got married at 25. I did not NOT want to have kids but it was not a big deal to me if I didn;t. . We had our first within 10 months after we got married. Now that they are all grown up i am glad I had them

alice55 · Answer

Pretty sure majority if them don't want children when so young. Kids are made in mid / late 30s so

Bricealan · Answer

@olderandwiser I tell 'em..."Be careful what your wish for"!

worldscolide · Answer

When I was younger (early 20's), I wanted kids, I still do.

Cubus · Answer

I look forward, although I am probably illusional about it.

DJB72 · Answer

Personally I wanted to be a dad when I was 16. By the time I was 21 most of the guys I knew wanted to be dad's.

I was 46 before my son was born. He'll be 7 in a few weeks and I don't regret it taking so long.

Jennz6 · Answer

I’m 35 years old and just got pregnant and I don’t know who’s the baby daddy or care because I have a girlfriend and she is going to be with me forever. I don’t need any men in my life.

Surely · Answer

Never felt like kids were necessary in my life in my younger years.

AviatorTom · Answer

Some do, some don't.

chrissykerdock · Answer

younger men just want blowjobs

Anonymous · Answer

I'm not that young, but I'd like to have a family.

BCRanger10 · Answer

These days, I wouldn't think so.

qwerty2469 · Answer

There is less than negative reasons for an American man to mary in America. The woman are trash. Thats why they are Pauling money to marry decent woman in Asia

Blackcat1952 · Answer

4 me. NO WAY JOSE

WhiteBoyChill · Answer

I do but probably not most men my age

Bizanizalo · Answer

Its complicated...

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