Is it possible to truly know someone, or do we only know the version they allow us to see?

[Emmytexrex]

In General though relationship whether is platonic or romantic. for me I think humans are complicated we can change but with someone you have know along time you can understand them and guess patterns but can't still fully know them

[Hal2002]

you never really know someone, you only know the version they show you. You can live with some, and never really see all of them. How someone act when they are with you, can be a 180 degree turn from how they are when they are away from you.

I look at my own experience, I lived with my wife full time for 11 years and had no clue about the different lives she led when she was not with me. At her funeral when her friend gave her eulogy and her coworkers talked about her, I had no clue who the different people they where describing where. The person's being described, was not the woman I knew and was married to and lived with.

For myself, I am a different person at home with family and friends than I am at work. It is not that I make myself a different person per say, but I am not as open at work as I am at home.

[ManOnFire]

None of us ever knows someone else 100%. Maybe 90%, but never 100. There is always going to be something you don't see or don't know about them, because they've worked to keep it hidden. All of us have some secrets, that's normal.

Some other people do wear a really good mask though, where almost everything you thought you knew about them was a complete lie, and who they really are shocks the living hell out of you.

[Simslover92]

Yes I believe so but it's pretty rare.

There's only one person that has seen all sides of me. That knows every part of me. That knows me better than my family and that's my best friend/roommate. And I can say the same about her. We've changed together over the years and grown closer over the 13 years we've known each other. I can't say it's possible for everyone but I know for me and her it has been possible to know the deepest most dark parts that you really wouldn't want anyone to know and we continue to show those parts because we know neither would judge the other.

I honestly don't think I will ever meet someone like that again.

[Emmytexrex]

Yh I understand what you are saying but still we can't still know what someone can do or not do even if we know them for years they can do something that you would be like is that you what Changed I can't believe this I have known you since my childhood

[Simslover92]

I guess that's true. That could happen.

[luvstoned4him]

I dont think its possible to know someone fully. If you ever read or did psychology, there is a part called "the shadow self" which the individual may not even be aware of. If they aren't aware of those dark aspects of themselves, who is to say that we are?

[Emmytexrex]

Yh I think so and I have heard of it and studied it, it is mostly the subconscious self

[luvstoned4him]

@Emmytexrex yes plus people change like seasons.

Sometimes when you listen to documentaries.. you hear things like " He was so quiet, always polite... so shocked that he did this"... life events and trauma can drive people to do inexplicable things. The psyche is a very complex matter...

[Emmytexrex]

Yh true that's so true

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

For the Titanic fans then

external-content.duckduckgo.com/.../

[luvstoned4him]

@Emmytexrex yup

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the mysterious dance of human connection! 🤔 My aim here on Girls Ask Guys is to help unravel these complex relationship threads. You're right; people are like onions with many layers, sometimes sweet, other times making you cry. 😂 While you might never fully know someone, you can definitely understand their patterns and quirks. The secret move? Open communication and empathy. Together, those build trust, turning mystery into intimacy—and who doesn’t love a little mystery in life, right? 😉

[DishLady]

We only get to know what is online (which is now heavily curated), what a person tells us and a bit about what their reputation is (if we bother asking around). in my opinion the best way to get to know a person is to just wait and see... "the truth will out" every time. Fake people can only be fake for so long before you start to see their shady side. (And there is always a shady side.)

[jennifer_bloom]

The only way to know somebody is to look at the things they do not tell you. There are topics where logical contradictions will expose them as liars. And there are times where surprising observations will expose their virtues to the world.

[DangerouslyCute]

it depends... some people wear masks... because they are insecure... and it can happen they won't feel safe with you and won't open up...

but if someone trusts you and opens up to you... then you, if you put effort into it, can get to know them really well...

it's how my friendships formed :D

[wolverin38]

Great answer

[NathanDavis]

two things have to happen... opening up, and also being understanding

three things I guess, because it also needs reciprocation

if you're trying to guess someone out, then you're just doing it wrong

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

# Know thyself.

I believe it talked about a path, never a destination.

For anyone, even more so for someone I'm looking at through glasses before my eyes, through my sentiments and perceptions. Now, the version they want us to see? Depends on how much psychologically literate the observer is. It's not so rare to show someone something within them they didn't see.

[Babygirl_S]

Depends on how good he is at acting. For example, it’s impossible to think someone like Henry Cavill gets off to gross stuff or things that can be disturbing to watch. You simply can’t pretend for too long. I usually catch vibes and can tell when someone is about to start a fight even if I’m seeing them for the first time.

[Nikki1989]

Some people will only see what they want to see.

[Emmytexrex]

That's deep

[On_cloud_wine]

I think people are very good at hidining their true identity. It only takes a matter of time, though.. sometimes years. That’s why I’ll never settle.

[SeekerOfTruth007]

No, it's not possible to know someone. You can be married to a person for 20 years and they might murder you tomorrow for no reason whatsoever. Happens ALL THE TIME.

[red-lipstick-girl]

No one is the same outside or at home. Eyes are not always right. People are great actors.

[Briennette]

Do the people who know you, really know you? Do you show yourself truly or do you only show what you want them to see?

[Emmytexrex]

Yh I show them my true self but that
Doesn't mean they can predict my every move and cause be change you might think I know them very well but situations and life can actually change people humans are complicated

[Briennette]

Do you show all of yourself at all times?

[Emmytexrex]

Not all the time. I try to be real with people, but I think everyone holds certain parts back not out of deceit, but because not everyone earns full access to who we are. So no, I don’t show all of myself to everyone, but what I do show is genuine.

[Emmytexrex]

What about you? Do you feel like people really know you, or do you hold parts of yourself back?

[Briennette]

I agree. People may not be deceitful but they won't ever show all of who they are. By choice and simply because it's not possible. Conclusion, no we can never truly know someone because we don't even fully show ourselves. I don't think it's a bad thing.
People don't fully know me, but again, I don't want them to. I like keeping myself to myself.

[Emmytexrex]

At least we are on same page lol but yh even as we humans
Don't really know ourselves
There's a psychological reason behind it we have our shadow self which is made up of our subconscious we can do things and be like an I the one that actually did this damn

[Briennette]

Yeah for sure lol

[WhitneySnow]

It’s possible to truly know someone, but it takes a lot of time and effort

[wolverin38]

you are right

[AndrésC64]

We only see what people decide to let us see.

[WonderingManII]

Depends on how deep the relationship is.

[Emmytexrex]

Even if the relationship is deep down you still think you might know them fully

[WonderingManII]

@Emmytexrex
You can't know anyone as deep as God does.

[Emmytexrex]

That is what I am saying and you say it depends on the relationship and I am saying it doesn't matter anyway relationship because people change

[WonderingManII]

Ok, I don't care to argue with you.

[Anonymous]

You could know my mum for a decade and not know the scum she is. By the time you found out it is too late.

[Anonymous]

I guess it depends on the person.

[Pterodon]

You can’t hide your true self forever

[Anonymous]

It is possible