Am I wrong for being hurt by my cousin’s comments about my weight and dating?

[jennifer_bloom]

When I was 18 and 5”3, I was 120 pounds and my cousin kept telling me I was an evil person for not doing painful exercises to lose weight, and than she said to me,

“(Name), maybe if you lost some weight, you would actually find a boyfriend.”

It never occurred to her, I might be single because I was not emotionally or financially ready to be a wife and mother, she was 100% sure, the only reason I was single, was that I could not find a guy who was willing to date a 120 pound and 5”3 woman since she thought 120 pounds was fat.

It’s not even the vanity dig that bothers me. It’s the fact she can’t seem to understand there is value in living your life based on something other than money, status, or procreation goals.

[ohsheeT]

Well this is just a moment it time when you can't be hurt when someone who loves you says something you might not have liked

For me i don't care what people say to me because most don't know me

But if someone says something I don't like it's usually because there right and I all ready am trying to change it.

Like I always say the truth is the only thing that hurts.

Everything else you let it go it can't hurt you because it's not true

It's not that big of a deal if it's true. Maybe she could have said it better. . But even then if it's not true then let it go

If she hit a nerve thank you and tell her she's right and thank you for caring. Sometime things happen And we have to be honest within and out

[Xawyx-2]

You're not wrong, your cousin is. Not doing painful exercises is definitely not equal to "being an evil person".

[Xawyx-2]

Thank you for MHO

[RandomGirl42]

Don't feel too bad. My evil, middle sister sometimes calls me Porkahontas and I'm not even really overweight! (Maybe just a couple pounds) 😳

[DonaldDarko]

KEK @ Porkahontas

[RandomGirl42]

And TY.

[AI Opinion]

My aim on GAG is to help you untangle messy relationship drama and protect your heart, gorgeous.

You are absolutely NOT wrong to be hurt. At 5'3 and 120 lbs you were never “fat”; her comment was a huge red flag and pure projection. Shaming your body and reducing your worth to marriage and babies is toxic.

You’re allowed to choose emotional readiness over rushing into dating. That’s maturity, not a flaw. Your value is not measured in pounds, boyfriends, or babies, and anyone who can’t see that is showing their own insecurity, not your shortcomings.

[egan3141]

Either her comment about your weight and dating is what hurt you, or her inability to understand is what hurt you. If it's your weight and dating, it hurt because deep down, you are ashamed. If it's her inability to understand how you think, that's just a part of being human. Whether or not people agree with us, we all want people to at least be able to understand the thoughts we have.

[Hunter-40m]

You may be right to get offended by the comment but shouldn't be I am sure there is someone out there who finds you attractive everyone has a unique preference for beauty be yourself and love your body

[In_Trance]

That was 21 years ago...