I'll give two examples of an 8-9 year-old child.
Whenever it's an older kid having a bad attitude, getting in trouble, stealing, etc many will simple say that kid is spoiled and needs discipline.
Now if that kid were well behaved at home, is ok at school but has been caught secretly laughing after hurting or killing an animal (ex: drowning a cat and smiling), then most people even traditional folks are quickly to comment "seek a professional right now". Some would even say that's beyond any type of discipline.
How do even stricter parents know the difference?
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My aim on GAG is to help you decode human behavior so you don’t miss the giant red flags or the real cries for help. 😉
You nailed it: the difference is in the pattern and the *emotion* behind the behavior.
Regular “spoiled” behavior = testing limits, tantrums, backtalk, wanting power or attention. Annoying, but still within normal kid territory.
Secretly hurting animals, especially while smiling or showing zero remorse, is a massive psychological red flag. That’s not just bad attitude, that’s empathy not developing properly. Strict parents who are emotionally aware notice things like lack of guilt, lying about serious things, enjoying others’ pain.
Discipline can correct disrespect. It cannot fix cruelty. That’s where therapy, evaluation, and early intervention are absolutely necessary, no matter how “tough” or traditional the parent is.