Why do girls love a guy with ambition so much? a guy that is driven, has goals, and why are they entitled

[Anonymous]

to wanting those type of guys? why are girls entitled to their standards and preferences to what they want in a potential boyfriend way more than vice-versa, the other way around? it's basically what a girl wants matters way more than what a guy wants, otherwise nothing will happen, the guy does not stand a chance.

Updates

+1 y

I could care less if a girl had ambition, drive or not

[Daph81]

a guy who has zero ambition would also lack motivation to go further in life.

Say I have 2 choices:

Guy A: he's smart, driven, has ambition and goals.

Guy B: he's carefree, likes to live life to it's fullest, carpe diem. He takes things as they come.

If I choose guy A and we get married, he's more likely to work hard to chase his goals. And a guy like this would not be lazy. As long as his goal hasn't been fulfilled yet, he's going to keep on working on it. It shows diligence, endurance, patience. There is a pretty big chance that he will be successful one day. But even if he isn't, he is less likely to turn into a useless pig who only sits around yapping about today's economy but doing absolutely nothing.

If I choose guy B and we get married, he will be the type who only take things as they come. He doesn't yearn for more. He lives in the moment, and most likely doesn't think that much about tomorrow. Which means, that if something doesn't fall on his lap, he's not likely to get up and look for it. If a carreer opportunity doesn't fall on his lap, he'll most likely be lazy.

And again, I'm not the type of girl who chases wealth. Wealth doesn't mean anything to me. Too much ambition is also not good for me. But no ambition, no drive, no goals, usually also means no sense of responsibility. And I wouldn't want to marry a guy who lacks responsibility.

FYI, a lot of men nowadays also demand this in a woman. I can't count how many times I've been asked this question by men who are trying to get to know me: "what do you want to do in life? What do you want to achieve?"

[udolipixie]

Why do girls love a guy with ambition so much? a guy that is driven, has goals, and why are they entitled to wanting those type of guys?

Perhaps gals love a guy with ambition so much as ambition often is correlated with other favorable traits like- hardwork, determination, and passion. Also people tend to admire those that have a purpose correlate ambition and gals seem to want a partner they can admire.

why are girls entitled to their standards and preferences to what they want in a potential boyfriend way more than vice-versa, the other way around?

Vastly different experiences as I find most people think everyone is entitled to their standards and preferences to want what they want however they are not entitled to have it. Perhaps it's the way the entitlement is acted on as I find guys way way more than gals tend to think they're entitled to having what they want.

"it's basically what a girl wants matters way more than what a guy wants"

I highly doubt that considering how much more articles I see about pleasing a guy versus pleasing a gal. I can browse through various girl-centric magazines and get several articles in one magazine while I can browse through various boy-centric magazines and get one if I'm lucky.

" otherwise nothing will happen, the guy does not stand a chance."

I'm unsure what you mean by that since if the gal doesn't meet the guy's desires she does not stand a chance either. Possibly if she doesn't meet his physical desires she may not even stand a chance at meeting him as generally guys approach and gals get approached.

[Anonymous]

People often want to be with someone who shares the same goals and interests. If a woman is goal-oriented or ambitious, she's not going to want to be with a man who doesn't value those same things.

Less driven women don't really hold ambition very high on the check list.

[Confucius16]

What are you talking about?

So girls should like a guy who has no ambition?

Why are girls entitled to their standards and preferences? Um, because they have a choice, and that's called free will?

I don't see that a what a girl wants matters more than what guys want. Perhaps some guys are more attracted to a woman's body, than her values, etc.

Either way, some girls are also "attracted" to guys with no ambition, just because "he looks attractive", even if he has the potential to be abusive, etc.

[Asker]

the last part, well that's nice and interesting to know

[Confucius16]

Yes, but those girls aren't doing the right thing. It happens, but it's not good in the long run. Or maybe they are together and not worrying about the future, just living in the now. That's okay too.

In my culture, you live with your parents and extended family (sometimes). So everybody supports each other and everybody works (hopefully). Then it's so much easier to pay the bills, etc.

[Asker]

yeah because I'm not looking to settle down

[Hamburgers]

It's a MYTH. They DON'T like that.

If "ambition", "motivated", "driven" traits are "attractive", then motivational speakers, guys like Brian Tracy would be on the cover of GQ magazines and be getting laid like rockstars.

It just isn't true.

Ambition, motivated, driven: ONLY attractive when 1) You are ALREADY attractive 2) You are successful (resources).

In other words, with or without these "traits" the male remains attractive.

[Confucius16]

I'm not sure if it's a myth, but I agree with those two points you make. Ambition does make some guys seem more attractive, although perhaps it increases desirability.

[Hamburgers]

Humans are suckers for hindsight bias. Gates, Jobs, and Zuckerberg weren't interesting until they made millions and billions of dollars.

Women weren't dropping like flies for Warren Buffett either. Ambition has nothing to do with attractiveness.

Ambition =/= attractive

Attractive = attractive

However, if you looked like John Stamos or James Franco, then ambition is perceived as "attractive."

[Asker]

yeah besides, after all, money did not exist when we were living in caves, and I believe us humans minds haven't really changed much since those primitive times

[Hamburgers]

Great statement. Humans haven't evolved very much since the tribal days. There's this distortion that because our technology and culture is far different than 100 years ago, that our biological systems equally advanced. It just isn't true.

[simplythebest]

In order for me to be in a relationship with someone, I would need to respect and admire them. I respect people who work hard, are ambitious, driven and are willing to grow and change and be the best version of themselves. I like these characteristics in people and I like to encourage myself to be like this also.

You should want this from your partner too. It shouldn't be a one way street. I can't respect women who feel as though they are entitled to everything whilst being a princess. No, I'm sorry I'm not having that! I can't waste my time on people like that.

[lumos]

Whine, whine, whine, whine... that's all you anonymous guy askers on here do. Why do guys feel entitled to getting girls that have a small waist, giant boobs and a big ass? Why do guys feel entitled to get sex from a girl just because they're nice to her? Why do guys feel entitled to get their feelings reciprocated just because they have the balls to say them out loud? Why do guys feel entitled to get every single thing done their way?

[simplythebest]

Love it!

[Confucius16]

Hey. Not all guys are like that. But unfortunately, too many are.:(

[lumos]

Yeah, I know! I was just using QA's technique to give him some of his own medicine... haha.

[lumos]

@update: well, that's YOUR preference. And, you know, not everybody is like you. Get over it.

[Confucius16]

QA, if you could care less, then that means you care. And actually, you cared enough to ask the question in the first place. That update looks like you don't like the answers you're getting, because they're the opposite of what you believe.

[Anonymous]

A woman is entitled to want whatever type of man she desires, it's the same for a guy. Being entitled to WANT something doesn't mean you're entitled to have it. Two different things here. Why do women want ambitious men? Why WOULDN'T they want an ambitious man? Who wants to be with someone who isn't motivated to get places in life? Do you not like this because you aren't ambitious? I don't really see how this is a problem. If you aren't a motivated individulal, what do you have to offer a partner?

[Asker]

I don't care if a woman is ambitious

[Anonymous]

This might sound repetative but I think it really has to do with what qualities the man has that match their lifestyle. You stand a better chance in a relationship if you both like and want the same things in life.

If a girl wants a house, children and to live in a stable familar enviornment and community she will want a man who's goals are related to a good job in a near by city etc...

If the girl has no desire for children and likes the idea of traveling and what not she will want the same free spirited mate.however even this type of lifestyle requires some ambition so tgat you can make it happen.

The majority of women however don't fantasize about traveling and things forever eventually they want stability which is why I think that as women age the more the demand the type of guy you described.

[Theguyoverthere]

Having goals and ambitions means they are progressing with their life. If he isn't, his life is a dead end and who wants to be with someone who is not doing anything. Only some girls are as conceited as you're describing and while many do have over-the-top preferences when they are nothing to bring home to mom it's up to you to find someone who is not like that. You gotta swim through the junk to find the treasure.

[Asker]

Its like girls only want guys who are better than them

[Theguyoverthere]

Those types of girls who limit themselves to guys better than them are not mature enough to be dating and/or have an underlying motive in regards to that person.

[Littletad]

They do? I find girls now more and more often to be going after douche bags and a**holes. Mainly because they make effort whereas a patient driven guy gets the shaft. Though not always.

[rdrgzjcqln]

I'm young, goal driven, and astute. Do I really want a guy that has no care in the world and just sits at home like a bump on a log? No. I'm sure you wouldn't want the same from female if you were in my shoes.

[Confucius16]

I know, right?

[rdrgzjcqln]

Deff !

[RosaliaVanderbilt]

GIrls are hardwired to look for a provider. Ambitious guys with a plan have the potential to be a great provider.

[Anonymous]

*in regards to your update*

see, you say that, but how likely is it that you'd find yourself going for a highly attractive and intelligent girl that is naturally driven, over some average, damsel in distress type that only aspires to be a housewife?

it really goes both ways. most guys are more attracted to drive and ambition than they really think, because it usually comes naturally with the highly sought after girls.

[lace1228]

Would you date me if I sat on my ass all day? What if I had nothing to live for or set no goals for myself to grow,learn and change.

[TokusatsuComicLover]

tell me about it, I hate how it has to be like this

[523206720]

I'm attracted to power and intelligence and principle - that's why I like ambitious guys.

[Anonymous]

Guys think they are entitled to a hot girl with a great personality and nice rack. Even ugly guys. Explain that one.

[Theguyoverthere]

I've seen such guys thinking such in person too. Very messed up when I see it and think "Look in the mirror..."

[Opinion Owner]

Yep. Me too. It's pathetic. I can't believe even ugly guys think they deserve hot women.

[Confucius16]

Agreed.

[Anonymous]

They're looking for someone whom they see themselves settling and spending their life with.

[Anonymous]

Why wouldn't you want to be successful? If you don't want to go anywhere in life, sorry but something is wrong, and then you wonder why no woman wants you.

[simplythebest]

Love this answer!

[Opinion Owner]

I don't get it. How does anyone not want to succeed? We all have to work. That's life. I work 2 jobs and have a full load of classes right now. I'm stressed out of my mind sometimes but you gotta do what you gotta do. I don't want to work these crappy jobs forever. lol

[Asker]

well it's not like I'm unemployed but I'm content with my job

[Opinion Owner]

That's good but are you working a good job making good money? Have you earned a college degree or learned a valuable skill after high school?

[Asker]

No I'm working at a grocery store, no college degree unfortunately

[Opinion Owner]

There's part of your problem then. I can't think of any woman that dreams of being with a grocery store employee, can you? That's a very low paying, minimal skill, dead end job. Enroll in some college classes. Learn a skilled trade. Apply for financial aid if you need to and crank out that degree! Women want a man that can support her and her family, a man with a profession. That's going to require an education. You have to get motivated though somehow.

[Asker]

No I can't but luckily for women they can work that type of job and most guys won't care

[Opinion Owner]

Well there ARE women that don't care all that much either, but they're not usually aspiring to do much with themselves either. If you're looking for good looking, driven girls expecting them to give you a chance, just know that they at least want a like minded man that has the drive to make a good living. Isn't that only fair? You could be going for the wrong women.

You have to be the man that a woman wants. If you want a stand-out woman, be a stand-out man yourself. Climb your way to the top!

[Asker]

well the only way I would admire and be attracted to an independent woman who makes her own money is if I am looking to get married and settle down, but I don't want to get married or settle down anytime soon

[Anonymous]

Because women are naturally more selective which makes perfect sense. We are the ones that pregnant. I guess that's something you missed in biology class.

[moviedude714]

I think that is evolution

[Vandal]

They make better guard dogs and workhorses.

[Anonymous]

It's called having standards

[Confucius16]

Nice:D