I believe that it takes love and understanding and compassion to mature somebody into independence and self reliance.
And also, that it takes cleansing through resistance and unhappiness or discomfort to remove us from bias and uncleanness.
An immature person who has not experienced God’s love, will not serve God properly because they have not been cleansed from their selfishness or their superficiality.
An unclean person who has not been cleansed from their bias and their knowledge limitations cannot forgive others, because they are not able to accept the pure spiritual world that exists outside their conscience and frame of reference.
This is why the immature person must be cleansed from their self-consciousness with love. Than she can serve and love.
And why the bias person must be resisted and humbled until they are no longer stingy or possessive of others. Than he can forgive.
This is how you clean somebody and get them prepared for the gospel, not with words, but with prayer.
Set an example not by teaching but by doing.
Set a standard not by judging but by praying.
Set an outcome not by demanding but by giving.
Than, you can be the salt that changes the world.