At the age of 19, my university journey is shaped by a tumultuous past. Family turmoil marked by my parents' divorce, my mother's battle with bipolar disorder, and the haunting specter of physical and mental abuse from my father have left deep scars. Battling obesity, engaging in alcohol and smoking (while steering clear of drugs), enduring bullying throughout high school, and navigating a toxic relationship have been significant challenges.
Raised in a Muslim household in a Muslim country, I grappled with my faith. Despite being an atheist due to an unfulfilled connection with Islam, I found solace during difficult times. Whether pushing myself in the gym, overcoming addictions, or facing family issues, a profound sense of something greater persisted. Struggling with doubts about the existence of God, I prayed for guidance and a sign.
Despite my atheistic stance at 15, I experienced transformative moments during personal growth. Shedding weight, avoiding diabetes, quitting addictions, and resolving family conflicts were victories, and during this period, Christianity unexpectedly entered my thoughts. A compelling urge led me to a church, and from that day forward, I identified as a Christian. However, I later faltered, succumbing to depression and sin, yet inexplicably, all paths seems to converge toward Christ even today. No matter how many times I lost my belief in Christ, one way or another I still came into Christianity over and over again, and I was without Christ, I forgot him in these couple of months and I got into depression again, yet here I am bouncing back to where I have started again.
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