5 Things I Learned Researching Domestic Violence on YouTube

[Dog19]

One day I decided to write a film about domestic violence but before I did I I searched YouTube videos on it. Here's a few things I noticed and studied during my time.

1. The woman is always the victim and the man is always the abuser.

As I look though these domestic violence videos I only see woman as the victims and the men as the bad guys. I searched everywhere on YouTube and I could barely find a video where the genders were reversed. People act like men don't get abused or hurt by their partners and it's only women. This is sexist and it makes me angry.

2. They're shockingly realistic.

I could relate to some of the videos. You see I used to be punched and hit on a lot by my older sister according to definition that's domestic violence and to add I know a few friends who been though being beaten, hit and punched so I know that's not good. Sometimes you actually feel like your in the video and you want to jump in and protect the woman.

3. Hitting seems like a normal thing to me.

People freak out if they see a man hit a woman and view him as the most horrible thing in the world and view the guy as a monster, evil or a piece of crap if he ever hits a women for any reason. If she hits him he's wrong for fighting back because she's a women and women are inherently more innocent and loving then males according to society. This is wrong as well. If my boyfriend hit me once I'd still stay with him. Why? Because growing up my sister used to hit me and punch me I grew up with seeing people hit each other to the point where I just viewed it as Normal. It may hurt but since it doesn't leave any bruises it's okay. This is what I grew up with.

4. Most of the male characters are the same.

The men are all the same. It's like copy and paste. It's like the writers are just taking the same bland bad guy and putting him in every film. Hey guys, make him interesting and do more then just beat on his girlfriend/wife; actually make a story interesting and grow a bond between the characters. Most of the videos are the same and lack diversity.

5. It helped me with my research.

I gathered enough information about domestic violence to write a decent script on it. Now I can write something creative and original.

#BATTLEROYALE

[Vesuvius87]

I don't agree with 3. If someone hits in a relationship, why should that person stay? It's not normal to react by hitting in an argument and if so, it means there is nothing to negotiate anymore. It means they aren't mature enough to solves their differences without sorting to getting physical.

If a boyfriend or husband hits me even once that would tell me he has the capacity of reacting violently and the next intense argument he's going to hit again. No thanks, I don't want to live in fear of getting hit if I say the wrong words.

[Dog19]

I grew up with people hitting on one another. I didn't think it was wrong until I went online..

[Vesuvius87]

Still, just because you grew in a turbulent household, doesn't mean you have to repeat the same with your future spouse. Don't let a boyfriend por husband get away with hitting and him thinking it's normal. It's not normal.

[Dog19]

I'll hit him back for sure but...

[hellionthesage]

According to the CDC women are actually more likely to be abusive then men that's how bad it is, we don't even acknowledge male victims despite them being the majority. But yeah your right they do not acknowledge it and its very generic when they show male perpetrators.

[Anonymous]

Sadly, I know two guy who have been with the same two very abusive women. One of them just married one of these women. "M" used to date "T". Then they split up. "T" brings "J" around, they start dating, same pattern repeats. Then J also leaves T, and meets A. M is still not over T, is bitter toward J for "stealing" her from him, so he conspires to steal A from J. He marries A, then they invite J to move in with them.

SO there I am at the gas station, talking to J about how abusive A is to M, and the cashier (who is a friend) asks me who were talking about. I describe the couple to see if she has met them, and she says to me, "Oh you mean Kermit and Miss Piggy. Yeah I have restrain myself here at work, because I just wanna come over the counter and beat the cunt into the floor for treating him that way, in public, right here in front of me."

I just look at J, and say, "there is no hope for him".

M and J are both 25, less than 100 lbs, and about 5'4". T is average size for a female of 27, and she's army. A is 22 about 350, and 5'7", has never worked at a job a day in her entitled fat slob life.

[Anpu23]

Check out the Facebook page male tears no more, for some actual stories of male abuse victims. But you are looking at the dialog, men are scary, men are evil, men are toxic.

This dialog is both intentional and propagandistic. I'm not exactly sure what the final goal is, but it's leading up to something.

[Cccgala]

I agree with Number 2 since situations when domestic violence do happen are really rampant in real life.

Annoyingly, Number 4 seems to point about the pure and recurring I-am-an-offender stereotype. The persons may be different by identity but the personas and impressions are portrayed with nothing but hitting.

Assailants will always be assailants by action and identity regardless of sex.

[Jager66]

Yeah it's crazy how wrong the Feminist DV model is. They would have us believe it's a gender issue where it's men who abuse women. When in reality most the time is both partners whoa re abusive and when it's only 1 partner being abusive most often it's the woman.

Women are also responsible for most of the child abuse, even after adjusting for time spent with the kids.

[BubbleBoy69]

Why is it when women have power over someone they perceive weaker/push over they are more likely to abuse them compared to men?

[Jager66]

@BubbleBoy69 Yeah it's a very interesting topic, I think it probably has something to do with Testosterone. In the absence of threat or competition testosterone creates fierce protectiveness, generosity and prosocial behavior. So a man would be less likely to abuse someone they have power over.

Conversely in the presence of competition and a need for dominance, testosterone fuels stingy and antisocial behavior. Like say in a competitive work place, sports, video games etc...

[sachinsanjay]

sorry for the things happen with women, it's weird but why do women forget that even they have 2 legs 2 hands 2eyes and every thing else use them.
my humble request to women and girls is that please stay safe and be strong and bold no one has the authority to rule others neither men nor women.

[Anonymous]

Domestic Violence happens equally between the genders and 70% of non-reciprocated violence is female to male.
There are 248 different scholarly studies on this.
You are right, society will ignore or blame and disregard male victims and then claim only women are victims which is a horrible lie.

Here is a list of the studies I mentioned.
https://web.csulb.edu/~mfiebert/assualt.htm

[zanderp]

I wish I could post this on billboards around the world

[Anonymous]

**** please

img.ifcdn.com/.../...ab1b47c15ecca86e20a4823_1.jpg

[Opinion Owner]

53% DV victims are men
73% DV are initiated by Women.
so as you mentioned in the point no.1,
i'd say please go have a life instead of hating men

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B7CwFEFCAAAzQCH.jpg

[Dog19]

Read the full post sir

[Opinion Owner]

oh, sorry about that. this is really awkward.

[LittleSally]

You can find a pic, but can't read? How did you write your search into Google?

[Parkwayvwhitechapel]

physically and genetically women are considerably weaker than males, due to estrogen, but there are some females with low estrogen levels.
who can build muscle, so i would'nt act like all females are weak, innocent creatures

[takumii]

whereisyourline.org/.../...os_Page_11-1024x656.jpg

[Jan1ssary_]

Why would someone beat women who are weaker than them? Cowards.. they aren't man at all.

[Alex88F]

scumbags who need a good neck hanging

[Anonymous]

On the internet, everyone knows it's always the women beating up men and raping them. That's common sense. Only SJWs, white knights and manginas deny it.

[dragonfly6516]

Rules 16 renders your argument invalid, sir.
"There are no girls on the internet."

[Opinion Owner]

@dragonfly6516 true, there are only men and catfish on the internet ROFLMAO.

[zombiebabe]

good take! but i think both can b victims

[StickStickity13]

Men are the primary victims of domestic abuse.

[jacquesvol]

There are men's refuges where men can hide from female violence. They're named 'Pub' or 'Bar'.

[Xfitchick]

Nice summary.