The Issue of Domestic Violence Among Lesbian and Bisexual Women Couples


I wrote this Take to increase awareness on an issue that isn't addressed by the media, by feminists or by LGBT community. If it's something that has been discussed then I must have missed it, but to me this is a very interesting discovery.

The Issue of Domestic Violence Among Lesbian and Bisexual Women Couples

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC)'s 2010 National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey reports on the lifetime prevalence of rape, physical violence or stalking by an intimate partner, focusing for the first time on victimization by sexual orientation. This in terms of the 2013 revised edition which you can read here.

It finds a victimization prevalence of:

61.1% for bisexual women.

43.8% for lesbians, making it the second most affected group after bisexual women.

And then, to not dismiss this information:

A 37.3% for bisexual men.

35% of heterosexual men.

29% of heterosexual women.

And 26% of homosexual men.

The Issue of Domestic Violence Among Lesbian and Bisexual Women Couples

Some observations about these stats:

Other than the fact that lesbians and bisexual women seemingly display the most aggression and violence, it seems homosexual men are less abusive in their relationships.

Before people claim homosexual couples are unhappy, is not as black and white. Homosexual men seem to be the less cohesive of all groups, but lesbians the most combative and seemingly incompatible. Where bisexual men stand somewhere in the middle.

The Issue of Domestic Violence Among Lesbian and Bisexual Women Couples

It also displays a sore reality for some that women are just as prone to violence as men are. Even when you consider there's only a difference of 6% of women abuse vs. men when it comes to heterosexual relationships.

I personally believe these things are not discussed because there are clear social constructions when it comes to gender/sex roles. We live in a society that is UNQUESTIONABLY built under the idea that women are nurturing, passive, dependent and romantically involved (which has to be the most absurd notion out there). It has also being characterized that men are the perpetrators most of the times, and that females are the victims.

This is the image the media has created on men:

The Issue of Domestic Violence Among Lesbian and Bisexual Women Couples

Clearly, the tendency here, and the stats we have about lesbians and bisexual women couples say otherwise. This does not represent a problem for men only in society, which is VERY detrimental. But also for lesbian couples themselves.

Did you know social service agencies are often unwilling to assist lesbian victims of domestic violence?

If you really cared and "support" homosexual relationships in general (including bisexuals) why you aren't spreading this information out there?

In my opinion, I believe liberals are very scared of showing the actual behaviors that women display on this issue. At the same time, you are harming those women in those relationships. Quite contradictory to me it seems.

Make awareness.

The Issue of Domestic Violence Among Lesbian and Bisexual Women Couples
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Anonymous
    They're collateral damage in society's unwillingness to view men as victims.

    Domestic violence is and was always a problem in society. It is good that there was a desire to crack down on it. But it has been completely taken over by the feminist industry, and by that I specifically mean the 'industry' of professional feminists, not people who believe in equal rights (or radfem separatists for that matter).

    The first domestic violence shelter in the world was opened in the U. K. by Erin Pizzey in 1971. Ms. Pizzey's research began suggesting that, contrary to what was believed, most domestic violence (certainly not all) was reciprocal. She began publishing research suggesting that over half of the women she was dealing with were better described as 'violence prone' (and needing help to break that cycle) rather than purely victims. Meanwhile, organized women's groups were pushing the idea that solely men were violent, and furious at her 'betrayal', some began barassing Ms. Pizzey, who eventually fled the U. K. under death threats (I assume from male feminists, since women aren't violent?). The entire academic model on this is that violence against women is based on 'patriarchy' and men's entitlement, and would vanish if sexism was eradicated. The facts on the ground, obviously, don't support that.

    So that's where we are today. In spite of repeated studies showing the contrary, domestic violence is believed to be an issue of men, either being brutes, or brainwashed by the patriarchy, into being violent with women. There are virtually no shelters where men can flee -with their children- from a violent spouse.

    Those 44% of lesbian women victims? A horrifying, but small number in comparison with the 35% of heterosexual males. But society will -not- recognize that heterosexual males can be victims. Hence, women cannot ever be violent, hence lesbian domestic violence must not exist.

    There's no way to recognize lesbian violence without accepting that female on male violence is also real. Nobody believes women are ever violent on their own. (Unless they're a WoC... then it's at least considered possible)

    Sorry lesbians, you sort of go down with us cis-hetero-males on this one, as a sacrifice to the perfect white hetero women who are always the victim.
    Like 6 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • Don't mind me, I'm just nodding on what you're saying here.

      Women are as violent as men (if not more) and it comes down to the facts. Actually, it's safe to say at this point heterosexual women are as abusive in relationships than men and lesbians are almost twice as abusive than heterosexual. As you said, no way to recognoze this issue without recognizing that, and that's what liberals avoid.

    • Fuck, lots of typos there...

      are as abusive in relationships as men*
      lesbians are almost twice as abusive than heterosexual men*

Most Helpful Girl

  • Ethrealness
    Isn't there also an obesity epidemic with lesbians? I think women (on average) are just too emotional to be with each other. Men are good for balancing us out and making us think in a more rational manner. At least that's been the case with my fiance. He's helped me a lot with my trust, jumping to conclusions, getting too emotional, attached, etc and I've helped him to become a bit more optimistic and nurturing towards me. He used to be very serious and a glass half empty type of guy and I was extremely emotional and illogical. We've balanced each other out like a good relationship should.
    LikeDisagree 12 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • I've hear about it, but I haven't looked into it tbh, I appreciate you bringing this up, though, and sharing your experience on this.

    • Yeah no problem :)

    • Well tbh, if i ever got married, i think i'd be the brain center, why? Cuz i'm the least emotional person out there with the greatest ideas and a logic that makes people ask for my opinion/advise on important stuff and issues

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

    this is indeed a rarely discussed topic
    Like 2 People
  • BuchitaBuchys
    I'm a liberal and I know you hate us, but there are many rocks unturned. Of course this is troubling and there should be more awareness, but there are many people who openly discriminate against them. There are already laws in place to combat domestic violence, but until recently, to protect their marriage, job etc.

    It's definitely an issue yes, but there are many issues in society that we can't rely on only liberals to fix or bring awareness to.
    LikeDisagree 7 People
    • I'm very worried about how the leftists are destroying people's judgement and brainwashing from inside out, for sure. Liberals are puppets of the leftists so I don't particularly hate you because you have been brainwashed.

      But going on topic, there's still discrimination about homosexuals in society but two things:
      1- I believe discrimination usually comes from men to gay men for the most part.
      2- Lesbians and bisexual women are very hardly discriminated. And mostly, people run with the idea that a good number of women (around half) are bisexual anyways.

      It's just baffling to me this isn't spread around, and that liberals rather choose to ignore the tendency here:
      That women are the most abusive in relationships, in general. Taking in account all sexual orientations.
      And that there is a clear need of exposure that lesbian women are the most violent and least functional of sexual orientations. How is counseling for them is going to work if they don't receive the necessary exposure?

    • I'm not brainwashed, I just care about people.

      And this is true, I do agree with raising awareness. But as I said, there are many, many issues. We can only do so much.

  • anonman32
    great mytake. i applaud you for this. i already knew women were equally prone to violence as men. but your mytake has pointed out some weak points public opinion about women and men. much more progress in terms of equality need to be made that even the liberals are not too fond of it seems. terrible.
    Like 4 People
    • Indeed. When it comes to comparing all the stats together, you'll realize it would be pretty much safe to say women are most abusive in relationships, in general. Of course liberals would rather ignore the facts because once again this is not convenient for their agenda at all.

    • anonman32

      thats correct, its not convenient for their agenda at all. it shows that they actually dont care for LGBT people.

    • Exactly.

  • MagiAlphaOne
    To my surprise (pleasant) I did not see anyone here angrily disagreeing with you on such a hot topic. Its hard to argue with citation and facts. Perhaps FACTS ARE KRYPTONITE to any opposition!
    Like 1 Person
    • I was very surprised about that myself. It seems a lot of people here have already wised up to the feminist agenda, and that the LGBT community made a mistake pushing transgenderism and mixing it up in a bowl with sexual orientations, when it involves many unwanted issues for that community like genital mutilation and mental disorders. So these movements have lost, in my observations, their relevance and their integrity (many gay people have opted out LGBT and don't want to be identified with that tag).

      Racial issues seem to be the ones with most weight right now, and of course the US elections coming up in November. It just felt like a good time for me to post this, and I'm glad you noted that.

    • You are welcome! I'm optimistic that the narrative is going to change. Milo Yiannopoulos is doing a great job speaking out against SJWs, BLM, FEMINISM, etc.

    • Definitely, the guy is brilliant. Liberals get very confused with guys like him (including Hillary Clinton LMAO). This is a gay dude who shits all over feminism and LGBT, and supports not only the alt. Right recent political identity but also the Traditional Right we all know.

      It's the same with guys like Larry Elders who is a black person who is heavily critical and against BLM.
      They are also two of the smartest people out there right now (among others), and liberals hate these people who only speak the truth, use facts, and logical sentences to support their arguments. People to admire, for sure.

    • Show All
  • JohnDoe3000
    "It also displays a sore reality for some that women are just as prone to violence as men are."

    Actually, these figures point to women being consistently more prone to abuse than men. But of course it all depends on the definition of "abuse" they use because not all forms of abuse are equally severe, plus not everyone will report abuse.
    Like 1 Person
    • Right, done by other women mostly. Also, heterosexual men are just as victims as women in heterosexual relationships. You should read the document, though. Lesbian women are violent in terms of both verbal and physical agression (including sexual agressions).

      In terms of your second point, of course not everyone will report abuse, including homosexual and heterosexual men. But the tendency would persist either way.

    • Maybe this got lost in translation but "more prone to abuse" means that women commit more domestic violence, so we actually agree on that point.

    • Oh, yes that was definitely what I meant. 👍

  • somebodysaycheese
    gay men act in rape in even higher rates than heterosexual men. I saw it on Oxford. But the thing is gay and bisexual men dont report it at all. which is sad and i wished they did.
    Like 3 People
    • I don't know that figure, if you find the reference I'd be interested to see it.

      But anyways, this is about domestic abuse, which involes verbal assault and physical assault (including sexual abuse), and as much as the media and people in general like to believe, considering all sexual orientations, women take the crown when it comes to violence in relationships.

  • Tony1974
    I've been saying it for years and the statistics prove it: women are more violent than men. They are more abusive, mentally, verbal and physically towards children, other women, men and the elderly. But the feminists don't like this because it goes against their agenda and hurts their ability to get federal $$$ to promote said agenda. Did you know they've stop record DV stats by gender now because the stats were showing the truth?
    LikeDisagree 6 People
    With the recent same-sex 'marriage' ruling, I cannot wait to see how the feminist courts handle the first lesbian divorce. Political correctness is eating itself by its own tail. No longer will they be able to automatically blame the man, and since both parties are female and lesbian, they will be protected classes.
    LikeDisagree 3 People
  • Relentless_Hippie
    Homosexuals are unfaithful to each other and experience more violence because they know something is wrong. They have a demon attached to their souls making them lash out. It's a war they have within their own bodies.
    LikeDisagree 6 People
    • 0112358

      I assume you mean homosexual women.

      Homosexual men, according to this data set, have the lowest level of violence. I presume this is because they are... the most faithful?

    • Loveherbut


    • uh, the only daemon I have attached to my soul is the one that got there through years of bullying by peers and emotional manipulation by my mother. Most of my gay/bi/lesbian friends are actually very calm people who are incredibly faithful to their current partners and non-violent whatsoever (there's one who' got a host of mental illnesses from years of abuse at the hands of her dad and even she's like "I would never hurt [girlfriend's name]"

      I'm literally the only one out of the group that has a hard time regulating my emotions and staying in control of myself, and that has nothing to do with daemons, and everything to do with emotional manipulation, bullying, and this cocktail of ADHD/depression/anxiety symptoms I've got going on.

  • Bandit74
    I heard this before but it doesn't really fit the narrative of men being the agressor so it isn't talked about as much.

    Like 6 People
  • feminismisnarcissism
    the stats also show that women are more violent than men... you ignored that part lol
    LikeDisagree 3 People
    • It's safe to say women are as violent, if not more, than men. That's for sure.

  • Saoirse_Nua
    I had heard that before probably based on those stats similar to those you quoted - I really try not to think about it in group terms just in terms of an abuse victims and what they should do, how should they be protected.
    Like 1 Person
  • alice55
    I didn't know that abuse exist in this kind of relationship
    Like 1 Person
    • Good to make people aware then. 😊

    • alice55

      Yes, people always show straight couple when talking about violence, abuse and all. It's good to know all the different side.

  • damnwinter
    Thanks for that... actually, my best friend is currently stuck in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship and unfortunately she is not aware enough of how wrong it is, because her partner is very manipulative. I find myself in a conundrum.
    Like 1 Person
  • Anpu23
    It sucks, that we are so stuck in a political situation where people who are hurting can't get help. I think we are up against this victim narrative where some groups can't let others be "more victim then them" so they repress information to prevent the focus from shifting away from their own agenda. As I've said a few times, if group A is suffering the fact that group B is also suffering, doesn't negate the pain of group A.

    The nerrative that men are inherently dangerous is propaganda that needs to be addressed, good my take.
    LikeDisagree 4 People
  • RussianBlonde
    There is no domestic violence in my relationship with my girlfriend
    Like 2 People
    • there will come a time trust me

    • @CancerianMan81 Lol yeah in your dreams

    • you're fooling yourself if you think every relationship is perfect

    • Show All
  • GreatnessBack
    A women always told me that women don't like each other.
    I knew she was right, but damn!
    Like 4 People
  • SvetlanaSavachenko
    You know what they say about 2 women under the same roof. It's a disaster waiting to happen!
    LikeDisagree 3 People
  • jo-1234
    Although I agree they are prone to emotional outbursts which may result in abuse, not all lesbian or bisexual relationships turn that way
    • Where have I stated that all are like that? No one can state that so don't change the narrative here. The fact is that lesbians and bisexual couples show a high tendency to be violent, agressive and unstable in relationships. They display the most incompatibility considerig all sexual orientation groups.

    • What she used is called a straw-man argument.

    • @Intraluminal tell me about it, people here do that very often XD

  • FemaleAssassin
    Yeah i do believe no one can be as cruel to a woman as another woman, that honestly disgusts me.
    LikeDisagree 2 People
  • mistixs
    That same study found that 89% of bi women reported only male perpetrators of DV.
    Disagree 1 Person
  • FreeSpirit95
    I do argue with my girlfriend sometimes like any relationships. We also do play fights, but no real physical fights.
    Like 1 Person
  • Phoenix98
    Is it just me or does the guy in the bottom picture kind of remind you of an older @blondefrog?
  • Rissyanne
    How do you think we can make more awareness?
    Like 1 Person
    • I'm trying to by doing this lol
      But really, it's a matter of handling the data and bringig it up whenever at the right moment. These topics are always floating around everywhere. But it's a matter of handlig the facts to have a proper argument.

    • Rissyanne

      I don't ever argue with lesbians or gays.

    • Who said you have to? Never have been at any social convention, particularly with close friends or family members, and homosexuality topics or abuse topics ever come up?
      Hard to believe considering there's LGBT and feminists running rampant with these things all the time lol

    • Show All
  • relaxrelax
    Disagree 1 Person


    • relaxrelax


      hun i do not like this place
      the people don't study and test things
      so they believe a lie

      and they call people crazy
      who have years of study and testing into things
      so yes im annoyed sometimes

  • Wulfila
    A good myTake. Thanks for raising awareness.
  • Anonymous
    This had almost nothing to do with domestic violence among lesbian and bisexual women. It was just a rant about liberals and the media disguised as being a caring article.
    You're a charlatan and need a better hobby.
    Disagree 2 People
    • There's definitely sarcasm towards liberals and their faux intention of caring for the lgbt community. At least you got that.

      As for you butthurt comment, at least get oit of anon next time. You're welcome to fuck off if you don't like what I writr about.

    • Anonymous

      I'm not butthurt, I'm annoyed that you lied with your title. I'm also annoyed that I read this garbage thinking it was about a serious issue when it's just your rant.

    • You are butthurt. I'm calling out people to make awareness of this, but that's impossible without exposing the bullshit the libtards would have you believe, including men being the violent ones. Actually, I even shared that lesbian counseling and such is not even taken as serious as the male domestic violence which actually represents a very small percentage compare to them. Sure it had some sarcasm, and I'm not denying it, but really the only one here saying this is garbage and being all angry is you. Go out that comfy bubble of yours first to acknowledge the big part of the problem here.

    • Show All
  • Anonymous
    From a loved one's perspective, I would suggest homosexual men are the least likely to go to the police. Not only do they have the stigma of being a man talking about domestic violence, but many officers are not good to gay men.

    My relative was beat up to the point of having broken bones, and the police mocked and ridiculed him.

    I think greater LBGT domestic violence awareness is needed though. Domestic abuse can and does go every which way.
    Like 1 Person
  • Anonymous
    Bullshit. This is a lie made up by cis-het-white-men/the patriarchy to take the focus off of male abusers, and any woman who agrees with this suffers with internalised misogyny. If women were in charge there would be no wars.
    LikeDisagree 4 People
  • Anonymous
    While were at it lets talk about the adopted kids of gay and lesbian couples being constantly molested and rapped by them. This horrific and growing criminal tread has skyrocketed in recent years because all it takes is for two pedophiles to get married in order for them to adopt a child. There is little to no red tape or oversight before the adoption because of the fear of lawsuits.
    Are all same sex couples like that no but an huge amount of them are.
    LikeDisagree 3 People
    • Do you have any references to support these claims?

  • Anonymous
    I've been saying it for some time now: if he hits her, if she hits him, if he hits him or if she hits her... LEAVE the relationship.
    Like 1 Person
  • Anonymous
    So in summary. Women are insane and more violent than men.
    Like 5 People
  • Anonymous
    Shit you have brilliant insight
    Like 2 People
    • lol why do you say that? And thanks 😊

    • Anonymous

      I've read some of your other articles and you just say really relevant atuff

  • Anonymous
    I was good friends with a lesbian couple for almost a year. We'd hang out at the bars and at their apartment weekly. Probably once a month they'd be having a fight that turned violent. The straw that broke the camel's back for me was on the dominant's birthday: she got really drunk and ended up getting pissed about nothing and choking out her mate in the bathroom. I heard it and ran in there and broke them up. I stopped hanging with them after that.

    Occasionally I see them and they always say "let's hang out". I tell them to text me but they never do. They don't seem to want to separate. It's like they both enjoy the emotional roller coaster.
    Like 4 People