The Social Trap: Social Media and it's Application in Socializing Nowadays

originaluser

I have already attempted this MyTake five times. I want it to be perfectly imperfect, so this time I am not going to proofread or edit or adjust anything (except one sentence I edited). It may be filled with grammar and spelling errors. Considering the topic, it's better that way.

The Social Trap: Social Media and it's Application in Socializing Nowadays

If the 2000's up to this point could be summarized by two words and one creation it would be

(Social)(media)

Social media has been around for quite a few years now and it's not going away anytime soon.

Social media was originally used to connect with people you otherwise wouldn't connect with. In order to connect with those people you had to have social media.

But overtime, that's changed. Now not having social media may prevent you from connecting and socializing with people you otherwise would have.

How so? Most people have a real version of them and a virtual version of them and those two versions are intertwined.

The Social Trap: Social Media and it's Application in Socializing Nowadays

When you meet somebody you're meeting the real version. But not the virtual version. But, since most people prefer their virtual selves, undoubtedly you will be redirected to that. "Friend me on facebook" "follow me on Instagram"

By all means these are invitations for further contact. With their virtual selves. If you want further contact with them, you must first initiate contact with their virtual selves. I believe there are several reasons why many people would rather talk on social media then in person

1: Insecurity "How do my clothes look" "does my breath smell"

2: Naked If you say something and I get pissed off you'll know I'm pissed off. I am unable to pass it off as something else.

3: Intimate We are forming an actual connection here

Five people meet each other. Four/Five agree social media is awesome

The fifth: I don't have any social media

The other four talk on social media post random clips and videos they find on the internet start groups, play games and all sorts of other stuff

What happens to the fifth person? These four people are getting closer because they are communicating with each other through social media. Where does that leave the first person.

Out.

These four are forming a close bond. None of them are very close with the fifth person because the fifth person wasn't around on social media.

The fifth person is concerned. And a little worried

In order to make a connection they have no choice but to interact with the other four and participate on social media. so now they've made a snapchat

The Social Trap: Social Media and it's Application in Socializing Nowadays

But they don't have any friends. That doesn't look good. That looks weird. They need to make friends and fast. But how to make friends?

Post random relatable memes

The Social Trap: Social Media and it's Application in Socializing Nowadays

Get likes on said memes. People will follow them. Now they have friends.

Now they can friend the other four

And the other four can share relatable memes and photos of coffee with that fifth guy

If the fifth guy at any point chooses to stop he loses the only form of communication he had with the other four. He doesn't enjoy it, but for the sake of friendship he tolerates it.

Without social media he never would have had those four friends. In between when they are actually hanging out, they keep in contact through social media. If that contact goes they will forget about him.

If that guy wants friends but does not want social media his only options are to find other people who are not using social media

more difficult than it sounds

He has to keep the social media profiles. He has to keep people interested. He continues posting relatable junk and pointless statements like have a good day everyone :)

Because he's connected with this social media web of sorts he can't risk breaking it. It's a fragile web. His best option is to get along with everybody

And the only way to do that is to cover up his actual personality. Don't give an opinion- especially an unpopular one. Be nice to everyone. Be happy... always.

Say one of the four is friends with a guy named Max. Max is a hardcore liberal. anybody who does not agree with him 100% is public enemy no. 1.

Max, who is connected with this fragile web, assumes you share the same politics that he does. "I don't believe this, these pro life people" then, pausing "are you pro choice or pro life" you're actually pro life. But if you tell him that he'll tell other people and pretty soon there will be an internet hate mob at your front door. And he's hardcore so "in certain instances" isn't going to fly. The only choice other then lying and going against your moral values is to nod your head in agreement. There, you made a friend. Now that wasn't so hard. All you had to do is say nothing and not give your opinion. And you got a friend out of that- or, at least, you didn't make an enemy.

From here on out you just agree with whatever somebody is saying at the time. If you don't you risk making an enemy, and that enemy can ruin everything.

Consider a not so far fetched scenario. You say "pro life" max posts it on his social media wall. Likely as not his other friends have the same exact politics. Now all his other friends see it. They hate you. They have never even met you but they already hate you. And we're talking hundreds of people. That's hundreds of people you can never connect with.

Because ultimately social media doesn't encourage us to see the differences in people. It encourages us to see the similarities and form groups based on said similarities. One wrong move and you're out of the group

So what if you have social anxiety and just don't want to participate? Fine, nobody's forcing you to. But don't expect to make any friends. You aren't part of the "in" crowd.

Why social media is so antisocial

Social media isn't built in a way that encourages socialization. All current social media platforms encourage you to have lots of friends and may ask you to friend people you don't even know. Having one or two friends is, unacceptable.

There could be a social media site that truly emphasizes socializing. But, just like with any other idea someone has to build it, expand on it, and bring it to fruition. But there are obstacles. And this, perhaps, is the main issue. The CEO's who become millionares and successful are the ones who are willing to take credit, steal, and manipulate their way to the top. So ultimately you have all these antisocial CEO's creating social media platforms to make as much money as possible. So a platform where you truly enjoy socializing with the friends you have won't cut it. To sell products they need to push you to have lots of friends. And if other people have lots of friends, you have to as well or you're weird

take a look at some of the top CEO's

Jack Dorsey-backstabbed his friends to get to where he is now

Evan Spiegel-Rich douchebag. Egomaniac

Through the eyes of a Sociopath

I'm not saying these guys are sociopaths but their social media platforms value what a sociopath would value about socializing- power. Who needs friends if you have power and influence. A narcissist wants everybody to know them.

When you have people like this inventing platforms for socializing it's little wonder the platforms don't actually encourage socialization and only encourage fame. It's a reflection of them-screwing over longtime friends for fame and fortune.

What you can do

most people's best friends are colorful opinionated people who are a lot of fun to be around. Because those are the best type of people. The bland sort of people who follow everybody's interests like a sheep are the most successful on social media- but in real life it's the people with a personality.

Start with this: The next time someone brings up a social media platform, at the risk of ostracizing yourself be honest about why you don't use it. Because you don't like the whole internet fame sharing thing. Because you don't want a ton of friends you'd rather have a couple close ones. Whatever the result at least you're honest

I guess I should be too then

This is not my first account on here. I have been an account w a picture of bioshock- can't remember the name

recently whateverscheapest and rewindcity0. and another account before that I was editor and I posted a few controversial posts regarding politics and black lives matter. and a few others as well. I think I gave some bad health advice on one and asked for opinions regarding my looks when I was younger.

And if you don't like any of those you don't like me. and I'm tempted to delete this account now. If I do I've failed and ultimately I'm a hypocrite.

But I'd rather be that then a fake.

The Social Trap: Social Media and it's Application in Socializing Nowadays
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