Why I Don't Like Being Black!

[AdmiralBailey]

Can I just start by saying good evening to everyone.

I'm a tad emotional after watching a video of why black women don't like educated or "lame" black men and I just had to get my feelings out. My feelings are not a representation of all young black men but it is a thought the keeps a certain segment of black boys up at night.

I.e why some black men are too lame; nerdy; or oratorically eloquent to date for black women.

I'd just like to know why the black community holds us (black men) to a high standard of failure? Just today a black woman and her husband stopped me and my dad. She handed me a flyer and asked me if I knew anyone who has been incarcerated and have trouble finding work.

A few questions:

1. Why do we reward people for shameful behavior?

2. Why did she assume that one or both of us had been to jail before?

(we have not)

3. Why not just a job fair for people looking for work?

I had no help getting a job for 5 years but criminals get pushed to the front of the line for employment. It just seems like there's no space for normal black men to exist freely outside of the internet. I need to hear everyday about how I'm not black enough from my coworkers and it's starting to get me down. I never knew that I spoke any different from other black people or white people until people pointed it out. Even my boss (whom I love dearly) . She told me that I'm not black because of my large vocabulary and I suppose that means that most blacks aren't as fortunate.

On to the real topic...

It seems like everyday there's some fervor on the net whenever a black man gets caught with a non-black woman and black women are livid about it. I personally couldn't give a crap about who anyone dates because I'm not getting any of that ass and I care more about what's happening with my cock/dating life.

But black women don't seem to carry that same logic...They complain that black men don't want them anymore all because TMZ told them so. Black men complain as well that they aren't wanted because they aren't thug enough or speak with a Black American accent.

Ex. Tawk lack dizz.

Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever find someone to love me for more than a big dick or the Yankee fitted and Tims uniform that each black male child is issued at birth. Can I just live stress free without being held to a standard of failure?

Anyway, that's all...Just had to let my feelings out while they're still fresh.

[CHARismatic110]

She handed you a flyer and asked if you knew anyone that had been incarcerated. Maybe she didn't assume that you been, but that you could pass it on to someone who had? Why did you assume that she assumed? How do you know that it wasn't a job fair for people looking for work? Are not men who have been previously incarcerated looking for work too? Now if those same previously incarcerated men weren't trying to get a job, you'd have something to say about that too. Instead of seeing the good in something like that, you'd rather look down your nose at it. And therein lies the problem. It's not how you speak or that you're educated. It's that you think you're better.

Your life played out a different way. You mentioned a father. If you were lucky enough to have him around growing up then you're already steps ahead of so many other black men who grew up without one. In neighborhoods and situations set up for them to fail. Not all of them dodged the traps. So they ended up in the system. Also designed for them to fail. You did not. Congratulations. And I mean that. But now you're on a high horse complaining about being black. It's not a good look. And it has nothing to do with the way you talk or you being nerdy. Funfact: I've been getting told I talk/act like a white girl since middle school. I ain't never not wanna be black. Check yourself, mate.

[Wowgirl10q]

You should every culture is beautiful and unique

[Dargast]

Hang in there dude. Your life's your own, and you probably won't meet these people a second time in your life anyway.
That's why identity politics are so retarded and I thank god for being born in Germany.

[Someguynamedbob]

That sucks, just be who you are and ignore all the judgments and roles society puts on you

[Starbers999]

Good take - I won't lie to you. I'm pretty anti-black guy because even though I'm not black, I am getting bored of seeing so many black men with white women (Premiership footballers especially - trust me their reason isn't same as yours) To me, it feels like you are rejecting your own women because you don't think they are good enough. If it is genuinely because you feel like they give you a tough time for breaking black stereotype then I suppose you have every right to reject that kind of woman. It's good that you have given black men like you a voice - otherwise people like me who aren't part of your community will just assume based on observations that you are all like these football players. I work with a few black women, they are very different from me but I feel like I need to protect them from society because everyone is tough on the black woman.

[AdmiralBailey]

no offense but you're 33 and you've hit the wall already. why would any man want a spinster? when did i say that black women aren't good enough? you pulled that out of thin air. Maybe you are the one who thinks lesser of black women

[Starbers999]

No. Let's start again. - maybe I misphrased it. When I said " to me it feels like you are rejecting your own women". I didn't mean you personally. I meant that's what I think when I see a black man with a white woman. Not sure what you mean by me being 33 and hitting the wall already but are you seriously trying to say that I'm too old to get a man? Haha - how would you know why I am single? There are far older and more unattractive people than me in relationships so maybe it's not that no man wants a spinster like me, maybe I don't really want or need anyone like other people.

[Starbers999]

Also, my opinions on here will show you how pro black woman I am and how much I think of them. I didn't mean to attack you personally (like you did me) I was talking about my perception of black men in general. Well, I would say on this comment alone, I think more of black women but lesser of black men z which is what I've actually said.

[AdmiralBailey]

You literally just confessed to talking passed me and don't give a shit about what my mytake is about at all. This is why I'm not very turned on by the female mind. Women aren't kind folks.

[ScaryCool]

Wow, I just read the female comments and that is all ignorant as hell.
I can't say I know what it's like being in your shoes completely, but I will say this; don't let anyone, not even your own race, tell you how you should or shouldn't be. At the end of the day you are YOU before you are black. Just like I am me before I am white. Don't give up and just go for whoever you find attractive and you think you'd click with, regardless of their color. If you have a preference for your own color, I still believe you'll find that person out there.

[AdmiralBailey]

I don't think very much of women to begin with. Thank you for your kindness. I'm sure that I'm looking in all the wrong places.

[Anonymous]

That's shitty. I had no idea former convicts and criminals were getting pushed to the front of the line and being given priority over an average law abiding black guy.

The perceptions of dating that black women interperet from the media are often weaponized against black men, I see white men piling on alongside them, even saw a black woman post here about dating white men to spite black men.

I think the eloquence shaming is truly regrettable. I personally don't look down on ebonics as long as I can understand what's being said, but the idea that proper English or speaking of any language is a negative is just repugnant.

[AdmiralBailey]

The women and the government prefer criminals. Oh, don't even get me started. I remember seeing these swirl pages on Facebook when I was like 15. These pages had anywhere from 100,000 to 500,000 likes all from black women and the pages were name something ridiculous like black women who love white men. I never saw black women the same after that.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah you know, it's easy to feel attacked by the sycophantic dissemination of 'the swirl' posts as portrayed by popular media and crowded around by people on social media. I see white women doing the same exact thing for black men.

Really you don't want to prevent or attack anybody for dating outside of their race or having those attractions but when you need to be villified so that they can see you as that less datable man so they can put the other race on a pedestal it can feel like bullshit, and you're left wondering how much of this was them buying into propaganda.

It's hard to see women the same after that, let alone your own race of them.

[Opinion Owner]

I don't understand these women who want to reward criminals.

[AdmiralBailey]

I agree. You shouldn't date another race just spite your counterparts or make them feel less than spectacular about themselves. I've encountered trash white women that want to date me but reject them because I know they only want a black man because our standards are low and they want to get away with being obnoxious & rude. A trash white chick would die a lonely cat lady in the white community because white guys have standards.

[AdmiralBailey]

Believe me. Any white chick who's going on about how much better black men are strictly wants a man who's going to let her do whatever she wants and doesn't want to listen to authority.

[Opinion Owner]

Well I don't know if that's all of them, but that sounds like something you have experience with so I guess that might represent a good chunk of their motives. I never really noticed that complex in them.

I also don't understand these cat ladies, they're everywhere and when you're allergic it feels like god is just fucking with you.

[AdmiralBailey]

Yeah. The men of your home race are your authority figures and white women are trying to escape responsibility by dating black men.

[cherryphi82]

I think this association of proper anything and whiteness is false. You can be black and speak proper English but still sound black. Yes, I know, people are gonna argue me on the definition of that. I don’t have one. But every community has a way of speaking that identifies where they’re from. That’s not a negative. It helps people know who you are and how to approach you. What I think some people are complaining about is when someone erases all those elements of themselves. Not all people do but there seems to be a part that does and those are the ones who come under fire.

[AdmiralBailey]

I do make a lot of black jokes. I'd get all kinds of heat for this if black people knew. Maybe people feel like I'm trying to erase my blackness because of satirical joking.

[Wowgirl10q]

I make fun of myself constantly and that's fine as long as you know your jokes aren't true

[Wowgirl10q]

There just jokes

[Ki_Wavy]

this reminds me of when i was talking to a police man and he interrupted me mid sentence to tell me how "eloquent" he thought i was and where i went to school like it was such a spectacle to see a black person who speaks properly and is articulate. i get where you're coming from. i'm not the type of black girl to get loud, clap when i'm angry, and fight even though it's somewhat expected of me.
simultaneously though, i have a hard time taking black men seriously in the sense that most have self-segregated themselves from us. personally, i've decided there may not be a black guy out there for me and i need to look elsewhere.
and I don't know who told you we're turned off by educated black men. you're the eptiome of "my goddd😍"

[Ki_Wavy]

but hey, i still love being black. nothing will deter me from that.

[rjroy3]

Self love brotha man. Take pride in who you are. Nothing else matters. Being insecure about someone not REALLY loving you outside a big dick fantasy is just as foolish as a pretty girl dwelling on not being able to find someone who REALLY LOVES HER outside her looks. Or a rich person feeling the same about the lifestyle they can provide.

Accept yourself. Focus on being someone you like and all else is irrelevant. You'll find the right people come into your life. We don't attract what we want. We attract what we are.

[ovoxo_]

I agree with you people always see I'm not black enough because I'm smarter than them and wear classy clothes instead of hug pants hanging from my ass. Also, black women call me lame because I'm not drug selling thug instead I'm in college studying biology.

[AdmiralBailey]

I feel your pain dude. I hope you go as far as humanly possible in your schooling and career. Never let anyone get you down because you're smart and dress conservatively.

[ovoxo_]

Thanks bro I can't wait until I'm a Dr. so they'll try to hook up with me after they've let themselves go and are fat single mom with thug babies so I can reject them. I hope you go far too.

[AdmiralBailey]

Welcome bro!

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

You can't possibly be in college and be surrounded by trashy black women. Not happening. Black women in college are far from ghetto.

Ghetto women of any kind are only typically found in poor torn down areas of a town.

[AdmiralBailey]

@Hispanic-Cool-Guy I think like half of black chicks have herpes. Hsv1 isn't fun

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

If that is the case then they are getting it from nasty infected black men, especially the down low homos.

[AdmiralBailey]

@Hispanic-Cool-Guy And? I don't date men. Both parties didn't care about a condom

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Then don't talk trash about your own black sisters, especially online. Smh

[AdmiralBailey]

@Hispanic-Cool-Guy Why? Statistics show that black women are only procreating with a very small group of black males. I don't owe them a damn thing because they don't feel like they owe me anything

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Whatever.

[ovoxo_]

Black women in college still want a lesser thug boy with huge pants hanging from his ass. That's who they choose to date around our age.

Only when they hit the late 30s/early 40s once they're wrinkled up with let go pregnancy weight and a few kids then they realize the jig is up and convicts are not dating material or good examples for their kids!

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Dude, you are talking about a low percentage of black women.

Who you think the white chicks be sucking up and being a thot with? The good guys? Wake up.

[ovoxo_]

No that's the high percentage of black women. If it isn't then why are black women the most single group in the country? And why are so many good black men single even when they're famous and successful? It's because black girls don't know how to pick good partners.

Also I don't care about white bitches. I like black girls.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Apparently you think black women only exist in the USA...

[ovoxo_]

I don't but that's who I'm talking about. Black American females. I shouldn't have to go overseas to find a girl now should I?

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

If you're a decent good dude, then you should be able to attract decent good black women.

If you act wicked and sinful according to the Bible you will fall into the hands of a immoral woman.

You attract what you are deep down inside.

I'm witness.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Proverbs 22:14:

The mouth of an immoral woman is a deep pit;
He who is abhorred by the Lord will fall there.

Ecclesiastes 7:26:

And I find more bitter than death
The woman whose heart is snares and nets,
Whose hands are fetters.

He who pleases God shall escape from her,
But the sinner shall be trapped by her.

[ovoxo_]

Even good black women are into the thugs they think strong stable guys are lame and date guys who live on the edge and on the other side of the law, I'm witness to this. Also, most people over here do not believe or follow the Bible anymore, especially women.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Wrong. Those women can't be good like you say if they are with wicked dudes.

Righteouness and lawlessness don't mix.

[ovoxo_]

It seems to work just fine for black women...

[AdmiralBailey]

@Hispanic-Cool-Guy 60% of the time when a black child is paternity tested the first man called into question is not the father. Black women sleep around worse than dudes.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

They might have more unprotected sex that leads to pregnancy, but not sleep around. Dude, get out of the house. Most women whore around at the same rate as all other ethnic women.

[reixun]

I assume you don’t get pussy because you’re judgmental and not putting yourself out there, not because you’re “intelligent”. Stop appealing to white folk like your boss when they plague you with the idea that being black means a poor vocabulary or talking a certain way. That’s extremely ignorant and should be unacceptable, coming from an employer in particular.

[AdmiralBailey]

We make jokes about race all the time. I don't think it's a big deal but what she said that day hit me deep.

[AdmiralBailey]

And I love that "you can't get pussy" cliché you threw in there. super orig.

[reixun]

thanks thought it was applicable

You are not special for speaking “not black” whatever that means. What you’re doing is allowing yourself to be degraded by someone you consider friendly and humorous without even understanding that it is a microaggression.

I sincerely hope that this entire mytake is fictitious because I cannot imagine someone who hates the color of their skin enough to attribute it with only negative features and wish to not be black. Do better.

[AdmiralBailey]

When did I say that I hate the color of my skin or my features? I mentioned nothing of the sort.

[reixun]

The title of the post is Why I Don’t Like Being Black, which is a skin color ! Ik, groundbreaking. You said you didn’t like “black” features such as AAVE, and clothing hence your derogatory use of the word “thug” to describe your idea of a desired black man.

You’re living in a delusion or a bubble. Women, black or otherwise, like confident, successful and intelligent men.

[AdmiralBailey]

Black is more so a culture than anything else. I highly doubt either one of us is the color of a black Ford Focus. I don't know what AAVE means and can't a thug be any race? The dictionary actually says the word thug started out as a way to describe devoutly, religious, indian men. If most women like smart men then why does the stereotype of the nerd who can't get pussy exist?

[azzntittiz]

I understand how you feel, good for you that you seem to be surrounded by support and decency. There's hope for you as you hold yourself to a certain standard and stick by your beliefs, I personally have given up on black men and thin it's best that I date out or be by myself, so I and black women like myself wouldn't object to you dating interracially. Things will never get better and the world is changing, so do you.

[AdmiralBailey]

Are you okay? need a friend? You're scaring me with this "it will never get better" talk. Literally no other culture just agrees to give up and self genocide.

[azzntittiz]

Sigh, dude I am way older than you and yes I'm fine just a little tired but meh, you need to smell the coffee and stop stressing yourself over the inevitable.

[AdmiralBailey]

Why mention our ages? you can't even acknowledge a fact I'm pointing out.

[azzntittiz]

I am going to go touch myself now.

[AdmiralBailey]

This is what happens when you speak calmly to black chicks...

[azzntittiz]

Dude, do you realize that you're attacking the wrong person?, there's a girl in the comment section attacking you and speaking nothing but ignorance and you attack me, you're calling me the ignorant and difficult one. You're a fraud like Tommy Sotomayor because you act like decent black women don't exist when you know black men do not want those women either, they chase you down but end up turning you bitter and angry because he really wants someone difficult and pea brained, you're here lying to yourself that I am being difficult when I'm walking away from a situation that you're trying to start. Why don't you just go date a Becky? everyone wins.

[AdmiralBailey]

You're shot gunning me. Saying so many things at once so I can't possibly respond back to all of it so you've won something in your mind. I literally never said that decent black women don't exist. This whole take is about wanting a future with black women and trying to understand them better. Literally that's mainly all the questions I ask on here. I have a few about non black women but they're satirical.

[azzntittiz]

Whatever dude, go get you a Becky, better for all of us if you do.

[AdmiralBailey]

Being difficult for no reason isn't helping your sorority

[azzntittiz]

Intercourse you dude.

[AdmiralBailey]

That's the funniest thing I've heard a black chick say

[azzntittiz]

Are you saying we're not funny?

[AdmiralBailey]

You're the first to make me laugh and I really meant it.

[azzntittiz]

Well that's one of the least hilarious things I've said, you should follow me.

[AdmiralBailey]

why is your page private? I'm shocked that people take Gag so serious

[azzntittiz]

No special reason, I just do.

[Starbers999]

@azzntittiz Not sure if you were talking about me when you mentioned someone 'attacking' him but if you were then I don't think I was talking from an ignorant place. I can only go my experiences, perception and observations and I don't think I am inaccurate. I am sick of certain types of black men using any excuse to not date black women. Some are bitter after a bad experience and slate them and twist their words and deliberately take everything the wrong way and then accuse all black women of being aggressive when they retaliate (even when they aren't being unreasonable). It's one thing genuinely not having much in common with someone and connecting with them but I dislike the type who don't even look at black women or engage with them because they think they are better than them (the footballers I mentioned above). A black footballer called a black woman 'a black slave' and laughed in her face in an argument on the train the other day. I only have a problem with these kinds of men.

[Starbers999]

I'm not sure if @AdmiralBailey is this type of man but I was just trying to say that this is my perception of black men in general so far (not all but the ones in tbe public sphere and ones I have seen from a distance) and his take was good because people like me who had a negative perception of black men in general got to hear their side of the story. Personally, I felt more attacked by him but what the hey. I just wanted to clarify in case I came as not liking black people because that's not true.

[azzntittiz]

@Starbers999 Not sure if you're the girl but someone basically dismissed him but he instead attacked me and accused me of being dismissive. But anyway, I have always known black men to look for any reason to date interracially, also they're the primary reason black women are as broken as they are, my question is... when you people gonna stop having babies by them and instead focus on your personal development? Let them go be with whom they desire and leave it at that.

[Starbers999]

I have seen the effect it has on black women and I agree, which is why I am harsh on black men. Not sure what you mean by this comment "when you people gonna stop having babies by them and instead focus on your personal development?". I am not white, I am Pakistani and we very rarely date interracially and when we do it's normally with white guys tbh😕 (although the Pakistani guys do like some black girls). I don't really care who people go out with normally , but I can't help but notice that none of the premiership foitballers are with black women and that saddens me for some reason. It shouldn't because it has nothing to do with me but I just think the world is very unfair to black women and maybe my being bugged by it stems from that.

[AdmiralBailey]

@Starbers999 Sir, my post is about understanding black women more. I'm literally trying to understand why they do what they do. Maybe you should try this with black men and see why they do what they do instead of just assuming the worst, sir.

[AdmiralBailey]

How is saying every living black person should date someone of another race and end black people indefinitely not dismissive?

[AdmiralBailey]

@Starbers999 You're only proving my point. Why are you so concerned about whom black soccer players date? Why aren't black women running down the black guys with tech start-ups and degrees? This is why we never get anywhere. You only criticize people who you think you can change and that's why you focus on black men. Same thing with me and black women.

[Starbers999]

Alright - I proved your point - that's your opinion and I am entitled to mine. I'm not saying black people should always end up with black people but I don't always like a black man's reason for doing so. Anyway whatever - you are asking for people's opinons and because you didn't like mine you are getting defensive. End of and have a good life.

[AdmiralBailey]

@Starbers999 This is why I have very little respect for women.

[Starbers999]

What makes you think that all women hold all men in high regard? Why tar all women with the same brush because you didn't like my opinion? I can tell by your responses to me and others that you just can't deal with differences in opinion. You have no respect for women who have an opinion than doesn't correlate with yours you mean.

[AdmiralBailey]

@Starbers999 You've just proven that most women do hold men in high regard because you're speaking to me. You can actually have an adult dialogue where facts and coherent arguments get presented. You don't argue with women because you think less of them. It's like when liberals make a fuss about voter I. D which basically means that they think blacks are too dumb and broke to get a drivers license.

[Starbers999]

Then your 'reasoning skills' could really do with oiling darling because they are not making sense to me whatsoever. You seem like one of those people who has kidded himself that you are really smart and educated because you have surrounded yourself with people who might not be as educated as you. I do the same with women by the way, me talking to you doesn't mean I think you are capable of a rational argument. If that was the case, does that mean by you continuing to engage with me, you hold me in high regard? Did it occur to you that despite our differences, that we might be 2 decent people deep down who want the same things in life and we should just agree to disagree without thinking the other is necessarily a bad person? I am an idiot for one reason, carrying on trying to reason with you. Like I said, good luck in life.

[Anonymous]

Interesting take. Women your age tend to want shithead guys. You are very young. Wait a few years. When the wall starts approaching women get their priorities straight or they end up alone on welfare raising T Bone's baby.

[AdmiralBailey]

LMAO. They love to be a "strong single mom". there's no strength in loneliness

[Juxtapose]

Being black will actually be great for you. You can weed our people who are stuck in a tribal mindset and not have to deal with them.

[AdmiralBailey]

That's a great idea. It's easy to clip the snakes that come for me

[coachTanthony]

First the white guy hates being white now this.. what in the hell is going on here? Am I being punked? Ashton.. are you there? HELLO? I don't like being short but... I deal with the hand I am dealt.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Lol smh... the self shame and disgust is ugly.

[JohnFrost]

yeah stereotypes suck and even the good ones have bad effects.

[AdmiralBailey]

Right. there is no good stereotype.

[opurba]

Please don't hate urself coz u r black. Hate urself when u choose white person to fuck not a black.

[AdmiralBailey]

I only like black women

[Goddess_Gag18]

I wish I could be a sandy beige color without having to go to a tan salon. Stop complaining.

[reixun]

LMFAO wtf

[Anonymous]

So are you saying you want someone to appreciate your intellect rather than your sexual prowess?

[AdmiralBailey]

pretty much