Society & Politics

I hope Johnny Depp’s win has a continuing impact going forward.

I hope Johnny Depp’s win has a continuing impact going forward.

Let me disclose: As a man it only makes sense that I will speak about the impact this case will have on men, and what this means considering the overall attitude men are given regarding this topic. This does not mean I am saying women may not have their own struggles with this, as well. I am not a woman so I cannot speak for the other side as I can’t look through that lens. I can only be considerate with everything I say, but if you want to enlighten us on what that perspective is then please respectfully do so in the comments but don’t say it as if you’re claiming women have a “one up” on men because I don’t see it as a men vs women thing. So, please don’t feel like yourself and your issues are being attacked and derailed from. It’s just by the fact of me being male and seeing how this directly impacts me and other men it makes sense to speak from that lens. Plus, each side deserves to have their own issues acknowledged and explored without it being interrupted.


So, what is the “continuing impact” I mention in the title? I hope it continues the notion that men can also be abused and women can also be abusive. This is not an attempt to demonize all women, as there are abused women too. This is not an attempt to stray the focus and importance away from women who are abused from abusive men. As I said before it’s not a men vs women thing, but historically when a man has come out from abuse and speaks on it he’s more often met with victim-blaming, gaslighting, and the questioning of his manhood. It’s more often “How can she abuse you!? You’re so much bigger than her! Why you let her do that to you!” instead of “I’m sorry that happened to you. She should’ve never done that to you.” It’s more often “You must’ve done something to make her mad,” instead of “It doesn’t matter what happened. That does not give her any right to lay her hands on you or to say the things she said!” When a man says, “She always belittles me and makes me ashamed of who I am. I have to walk around eggshells when I’m with her,” the response is often, “Stop being so sensitive and become an actual man for once!”


For the longest, we’ve lived in a world where those responses are very real yet the world keeps spinning as if this isn’t a problem. Take a look at this clip from Dr. Phil, and what he says to a man who opens up about being domestically abused. Yet, Dr. Phil still has a show. He still has a career. And he has yet to be canceled by Twitter hard enough to destroy most of his reputation. And to top it off, listen to how the audience reacts to everything he says, as if a man hiding as their abuser goes wild is the only option instead of confronting the abuser herself. Look at all the social experiments on YouTube where different scenarios of public harassment are done with male and female victims, and see the vastly different response male victims receive compared to their female counterparts. Men being abused is even portrayed to be funny in movies and television. Imagine all the scenes you can remember of unsuspecting men getting kicked in the nuts and it being played off for laughs. Same thing for when a woman slaps an unsuspecting male character across the face. We’ve been living in one, largely unacknowledged double standard and I hope this trial shakes up the world enough to give men the due respect and help as afforded women when in situations like this. Because I don’t think anything like this trial has happened with a man winning a defamation case against a woman, which is a HARD thing to actually walk away and win from considering said double standards. Even with glaring recordings of Heard stating ‘Imagine a man being domestically abused!’ this trial went on long often to turn Amber’s bumbling lawyers into court jesters with the tower of evidence stacked against her.


Lastly, I like to bring up the narrative I see being spun by some people and media. To sum it up, “Amber Heard shouldn’t have lost because it will be even harder for women to be believed.” I honestly think this is a very disgusting outlook. And, if their excuse is ‘it’s okay because false accusations rarely happen’ it doesn’t matter how big or mall a problem is, you address it regardless. Who’s to say something rare now will be the same tomorrow if left unaddressed? It’s still a disgusting viewpoint to look at. Take away the genders from this situation, you’re left with an individual who has been caught doing wrong. That individual is now facing consequences for their actions, and if anyone else is to suffer for it it should not be because that individual should’ve won, but rather for that individual doing wrong to begin with. I am not saying this will not have an impact on women who are actual victims because I do agree that the stigma will worsen for them. It’s not fair that the actions of one woman will presumably have a large affect on women actually coming from abusive backgrounds, but by saying she should’ve won is a disgusting viewpoint. You’re just giving a wicked person what she wants, and this will pave the way for future false accusers to continue abusing the system and that stigma would only continue to rise. It’d be better to acknowledge now that false accusers do exist, let them know they’re not gonna get away with it lightly to deter anyone else from making false accusations, and the real victims won’t have as hard of a time trying to be believed. At the end of the day, women like Heard should be held accountable for making it harder for other women, not because she didn’t win but because she’s a wicked, narcissistic, and abusive person.


Again, don’t feel threatened or attacked by any of the things I’m saying. I’m a male focusing on a male issue, and I tried to be considerate enough to not outright say “women don’t experience this” which I don’t believe anyway. Everything I said is not for the purpose of attacking your own experiences regarding the topic, but instead as a way of opening the spotlight to what I think it’s a big, unaddressed issue that has gone on for far too long.

I hope Johnny Depp’s win has a continuing impact going forward.
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