Here is what I had learned throughout life as somebody who is broke and in college. DON'T BUY THE HYPE! The truth is many men who say that are just upset they don't have good women (whom they often reject for whatever reason) that they have to take CARE of a woman, and they don't want to move up but expect women to dumb down and be down and low. There are men who do expect you to be highly independent and have a career, job, degree, etc. Because many of them are already on that level. The problem is that most women on that level are divorcing these men for either more money, lower money, happiness, or whatever reason. EXCLUDING abuse, neglect, and cheating.
So allow me to basically reiterate your question and description.
"I’ve been told by many men that men actually don’t care about a woman’s degree or how much she makes." It all depends on the intent. They mostly say it because they want a woman to have sex with. PERIOD. We're not talking about getting married, children, and raising a family. They are often men who never went to college, don't want to, but some of them don't want to go to vocational school either. They think that every woman is seeking a corporate man. But that is not TRUE. All we ask is that no matter what job you have, make money, and make ENOUGH to support the woman you want.
The reality is this. The men are just as much as hypocrites who don't know what they want as well as women. At least in the middle ages, you knew what was expected of you even if you had no choice who you marry and if you got raped. A woman who has a degree makes those types of men feel threatened. They don't want smart women, they want dumb women who they can use and abuse mostly. Not all. But a good amount. Even though highly educated and rich men can do the same. The problem is that there aren't many men who actually care about God and Godly things anymore. So it leaves women not to be wives because the moment they have sex as young as 11 and 13, they seem to forgive that is already married but it's illegal.
“the only man that cares about how much a woman makes is a man who wants you to financially take care of them” Bald-faced lie. I had a family member who did that to grandmothers of mine, the women worked and the men hardly worked. Neither of my grandmothers went to college. My oldest had to leave school to work at 10 years old. My other one got pregnant at 16, started working right away as did my late grandfather. Sadly that marriage didn't last. Remarried a guy who neglected and abused her also. It's a curse. If women get the men your talking about firstly who claim they don't care about your degree or how much money you make are the ones who often use and abuse you. A man who appreciates your period would be happy that you did what made you happy and want to offer for a relationship, instead of saying that. He may not personally care. But if you got a degree in business for example, because you want to learn how to start your own business, he would be happy that it's beneficial. If he too had a degree in business or similar and wants to own things or take over a family business, somebody like you would help him. Even Hospitality or work/life experience such as volunteer, charity, etc can help! Anyway, you can utilize your Godlygifts is what a man should focus on. Not down play a woman.
I find this topic so interesting. I have a friend's who's marrying a woman he's been with since they were in college (they're mid-late 20s now), but he would only marry someone who earns around the same as himself incase she financially rapes him with a divorce. Now, if you're not that solid in your relationship I'd question why you're getting married in the first place. Also, men talk about them losing everything but what od they think happens to women? What about all of the years she's lost bearing and raising his children when she could have been building up her career to earn more? She has to sacrifice something, she doesn't get to have both like men. So to say it's juts men that lose out is completely selfish and ignorant of that fact. I question whether the woman should even be marrying a man who thinks like that to be honest. I know I certainly wouldn't go into a marriage thinking that if it didn't work out I'd take him for all he has, and I certainly wouldn't marry a man who wouldn't think it fair to compensate a woman for the sacrifices she's also made! There are too many self centred unstable people around today it seems. I'd have thought you'd go into marriage with team work in mind regardless of what happens - especially given children are likely to be involved.
Generally speaking coin doesn't factor into a man evaluation of a woman and women generally do value a man by coin. (Its not just coin but also status)
I think the situation is that women have an expectation or requirement that a man make at least as much as they do which is probably fine in the lower income ranges but once a man has enough to be comfortable on just his income and could provide for a family etc in a 1950s style set up this becomes a real problem for the high earning woman, because she still has this expectation but now the percentage of men she is excluding on this basis is huge and any man in that income range also has a lot of value in the market because of the value that women place on money and status and as a result she will find herself priced out of the market.
If women are indeed thinking what you claim they are thinking i can only imagine that they believe that because of their own standards and expectations that it will translate into a higher status male partner but this just simply isn't the case as biology doesn't care about equality.
Yeah me don't care. Why women think that, well its because women DO care and they have this impression that the things that motivate women motivate men (which is not the case (same reason why I think guys send dick picks, because for them they are visual and seeing a naked woman turns them on so they think the same rules apply to women).
For men we are indifferent because we are the ones expected to take care of the woman, so her money is meaningless because we do not have access to it and don't want it (social conditioning as well as biological inclinations). I mean its not like its a bad thing to have, its not going to count against you (except in that most men know that the more money a woman makes the more money you need to make in order to keep her happy (statistically women only marry men who make more then them or the same as them). It can even be something that is impressive to him, but its not a deal maker or breaker, its just a trait you have (like if she is a gamer or not, if she is into fitness or not etc.).
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Who cares what they don’t care about? Get a degree and make money for you, not a man.
Besides, the ones who say that are a huge red flag anyway. Avoid.
I care about income and education degrees only in so much as that it tends to make things a bit easier in the job field... and I only care about her income in that if I lose my job, or can't find work (or I'm unable to work due to health issues or something like that), I need her to be able to at LEAST afford a life. Be able to eat, pay for some car upkeep, etc.
I would be frustrated if she did not work, continued to refuse to work (for years), AND didn't do much to contribute to "our" family success day in day out... if she's the stay at home mom, and she is capable of helping out, then she should help out - take care of any kids we might have, do the laundry or clean up a bit (I'd be doing that, too), but if she's just in bed all day watching TV or playing video games all the time... that's a problem.
If she has 20 jobs in 10 years because she's either getting fired or leaving because she starts fights or causes too many problems (and it isn't a "moral" issue or "legal" issue like she's trying to take down a crooked company), but she ends up earning 35K, I wouldn't date her.
If she hasn't been in the "job market" for ages, but she works her butt off to help others, and only makes 16K a year, and she has a strong sense of character, works well with others, her bosses sing her praises (even if it doesn't work out), that says more to me than that she doesn't make much money.
I'd like to think I judge potential and character more than her income... though income does matter somewhat (especially if mine isn't the greatest).
NO THEY DO NOT. This is the biggest difference between men and women on dating apps. Many women do not really get this point and it is very very important.
Many women practice hypergamy. In some ways it is in their nature. To preserve their family unit they seek a guy with as much resources as possible to start a family with and spread their seed with. Doctors and Lawyers and Finance guys are high targeted by many thirsty women even if they are only average looking.
Men are very different. They are biologically made to spread their seed with a woman who has physical characteristics for fertility. So on dating apps or at work or in society they are primarily looking at your breasts, your hips, your butt. Its biological. Its sexual attraction by nature. We as men do not initially care about how much money you make or your degree or where you work. It is purely your body and SEX.
We do start to care about those things when we start dating you. On that first date the differences are more balanced as we enjoy getting to know a woman and what she is about. But understand this. A man falls in love with your body first and then values everything that comes with it. Women fall in love with your status, resources, etc. first then everything that comes with it.
When I was younger, I used to care about that stuff. Not because I wanted a woman who would take care of me, but because I wanted a woman who was equal to me and just as ambitious as me.
I have a degree, I do freelance work, I work a full-time job, I own a couple of small businesses and I'm an investor. I've always wanted a woman who has the same principles as me when it comes to work and finances.
However, now at age 30, a degree and how much a woman makes is meaningless to me. A degree doesn't mean that a person will be successful and with all these student loan debts, a degree can be a massive setback.
What matters to me now is finding a woman who understands finances. I have met so many women who are spenders, don't know how to save money, make bad choices with me and have debt to their eyeballs. I want a woman who will be an asset to me financially -- someone who makes smart money decisions, someone who has their own money and won't depend on me for everything.
So it seems like your real question is "why are so many women under the impression that men care about their degrees and income?"
From what I can tell the reason seems to be projection.
It's what they want, and so they project it onto others without fully grasping that others can want entirely different things by their very nature. Men have their own version of it.
I think it comes from egalitarian thinking taught to us over the last two or three decades. When I think back to media and education from my childhood I feel like the attitude was always "be yourself" and that's about it. Only in adulthood do we begin to realise all the complexities that previous generations could have been priming us for. It was oversimplified for ideological reasons, and now we're paying the cost.
Having a degree is great and all, but you can see so many women expect it to mean something more. You'll notice many women ask something like "why can't I get a man", and then they'll include the education and career in their details about why they think they're supposed to be attractive and that's also why it's confusing for them.
They needed to be told that no one really gives a fuck about their career or education in that way much earlier -- I'm sure they would still take a similar path, but they wouldn't get to this point only now starting to figure things out... or not.
Boys needed the opposite, they needed someone to tell them "your success rides on your previous success, so get to fucking work kid!" Not until it's too late that they start to realise that education, career, skills, competency, resources, it's all going to count big time -- and the key is momentum, which should have been built up from an early age.
Well me personally , I am educated with one of the top undergraduate degrees one can obtain (economics). I have had girlfriends right threw teenage years up to now being degree educated.
I’m not concerned with women’s earnings , it’s more about personality. I find a lot of women who don’t have degrees become quite Insecure. The ability for us to form a bond is there fore restricted. They start to compare themselves to the man and may be get jealous if there accomplishments. I’ve even had women accuse me of thinking I am better than them. Or get quite nasty if I am enjoying life as a result of doing well in my education.
The extent to which a man who is degree educated and developed a career wants his woman to earn good money Varys. Because it depend on how much the guy earns. I mean if he earns 4 times the average wage then why would he care if she worked?
Also , do they have children. In my country it costs a lot of money to pay for babysitters. So the women could just work only to pay for babysitting fees. And also loose out on spending quality time with her child. So a lot of women choose to be a stay at home parent until the kid goes to school which does not cost any money.
I personally don’t care if the women makes x amount of money because if I love her that wouldn’t matter. I think personality matters more. Is she shallow? Is she only out for herself? Kind of things. Because when s*** hits the fan and you end up Poorly or loose your job will she still stay around?
No. Personally, and speaking for most of my male friends I know, we only care:
* is she faithful - no cheating, no lying;
* is she understanding - willing to understand that we also struggle even tough we often don't talk about it. And if and when we do, don't judge;
* is she a partner - will she commit to a lifelong plan and figure it out with us along the way?
* is she interested and interesting - not all people with an higher degree are interested in learning what life is all about.
Opposed to what the media will tell you nowadays, looks, body and status are secondary. A relationship is a team effort and if you're still looking at Chad, it won't work.
We want women that want to build something great together with us, as a team. If she works as a cashier, that's perfect, if she is a doctor, that's perfect as well... as long as she is a sweet and loving partner, I'll do my best to be so, and together build something worth looking back to.
Remember, the ideal is to build a home, not just a house... a home.
That entirely depends on what the guy is looking for. But for most decent men regardless of what they are looking for, a degree and job could be a plus point, as in one more good thing about the whole package that makes you.
Honestly, if a man only wants a woman for her degree and other achievements it's kind of a red flag because then it seems like he only cares about the status of being a modern man with an educated wife and he probably doesn't care a whole lot about you. I know that I myself don't want a man like that.
You want to be a housewife so for most men who also want a housewife they don't care if you have never been to university but if you have a degree then they can appreciate it. Some men worry about paying off student loans so you may wanna consider getting scholarships or going to a university with low tuition fees or entirely free education.
Men definitely care about your education and your career level once you get to the level of dating when it isn't just for a short term relationship. Short term meaning "anything less than marriage". Men under the age of 30 might not care as much about your education and career level because they want to have fun for now and yes they want you to pick up the bill. It will matter once you run into the men with the masters, PHD's, and high level Corporate jobs because they only want someone with at least a Bachelor's no high school diploma only, must be making close to their salary. So keep up your education and your career the right men will be there when the right time comes.
Yes.. If a man aspires to be rich!
A man who knows he can only achieve x wil want a partner to match him or earn more.
A man that leads a certain life and wants to maintain that without carrying someone, yes it matters to them.
A man who is wealthy through inheritance although there is a slim chance he might fall in love with someone not so well off he will want a woman who is able to adapt to his lifestyle.
It's not an easy road and their are requirements in terms of behaviour you know.
The world we live in today noone just looks after you for having a pretty face. You need to hold your own even if it's something.
So don't think of it as I must have this for this type of guy. Think about it as what do I want to contribute to society. What's my calling and where will that take me in life.
The right guy will match you, and the money situation will work itself out. I mean it has to really.
Women care so much about presenting themselves as solid earners because each sex thinks the other prioritizes what IT prioritizes. Thus you have women who think guys are looking for a solid earner, and men think women are looking for a musclebound hunk.
A woman who has lots of money is definitely not without its appeal; guys don't want gold-diggers. And a man who's in good shape has appeal; women don't want fat slobs. But a woman who puts all her time and energy into working isn't a plus any more than a guy who puts all his into working out.
I personally care a lot about my degree yes. As for how much money I make I don't care as long as I make enough to be able to support myself unless I needed to support a family then I would try everything to make very good money. I am still in school going for a BS in data science and hopefully should finish in about a year and a half. I care about my degree because I have spent so much time, money, and effort into school every semester after I transferred from community college. I like doing well in school because I want to learn more about my own potential in an educational environment and maybe one day learn about my potential in a work environment.
Because women care about a man's degree and they assume men feel the same way. That is why so many higher educated women get a rude awakening when they expect a highly educated man to want them. A highly educated man is attractive to a highly educated woman. And a highly educated man is even MORE attractive to a lesser educated women. Men have always been expected to be successful, men don't care about that and if a man can find a hotter, younger, funner, very appreciative girl, they will do for that. Now if she is highly educated he won't mind it at all. And today's men should not feel intimidated by a woman with a higher education and higher income. If he marries a woman like that he doesn't have to worry about getting taken to the cleaners if they divorce. So the best position a man can be in is to marry a MORE successful woman, but only if she checks all the other boxes.
Depends what men. There are plenty of different types, and some are kinda cray. Educated, liberal men generally care to an extent that a woman is educated to the same level as him, and if he is degree educated, he will probably care that she is ambitious enough to try to get a good job. It’s not just about the job, but what type of person she is and where she is socially. If she doesn’t care or is lazy and unmotivated about earning, she’ll probably also be lazy and unmotivated in other ways - unless her goal has always been motherhood, in which case those men wouldn’t be attracted to her anyway as they’d have different mindsets.
Not a bit. Even if a woman makes good money, we won't benefit from it, so we don't care about it. Women mostly want to "marry up," that is, they want to marry a man who makes more than she does. Women who make more than their men eventually come to resent that. So it does us no good. Plus, what we really care about is social and sexual chemistry. We really want to be attracted to a woman. In fact, we need to be deeply attracted if we're going to have sex with only one woman over a period of years. Plus, we need her to be someone we can stand, someone we actually enjoy being around. We'd rather be with a smoking hot, fun waitress than an unattractive CFO.
The reason women think men care about degree and career is that they're projecting their desires onto men. They think we care about the same stuff that they do, which isn't the case.
Out of all the men I've talked to this 2020... Only 3 cared 🤗🤗🤗. Lol 😆..
1) we ended up with only friend vibes for other reasons. He was also an executive director for the army
2) was a man I met through my divorce process—warehouse worker. We still hella vibe... But we can't do anything. Im now single, and well, he's not. So friend vibes
3) a separated man who is a physician assistant for the army. Now he's out on some mission thing
They found it super hot and I found it super hot that they did... Mind you this is prob 5% percent of men I chatted with that I found to be this way
They are rare, but they are usually super intellectual as well 🤷🏽♀️. I love thinkers.
Of course... But security isn't as important to us.. I'm speaking from my point of view... Her personality and believe it or not are compatibility in the bedroom. . and I'm not talking about making love I'm talking about having fun there's a difference and it's important to some of us... Women are more into the thought of making love until it gets boring and hopefully we provide something that breaks the boring and makes it fun... so degree and how much money she makes isn't most important but sure it's important you want your mate to be successful happy and extra money never hurts
I do but not to the extend, that i want to know actual numbers or exact titles but so that you can sustain your living like most of us do or even better like the middle class or above.
i do this so i can weed out the financial disaster type of women, which are the same women, that are sought after those same men, who don't care about women's accomplishments, academic degrees, Job title and their salaries.
it's a win-win situation. Career women for me and financial disaster women for them. (Hope they like bankruptcy 😝)
I only care if she can be completely financially independent and isn’t looking for a savior. She might be happy to be dating a guy who makes more money than her but she doesn’t NEED that.
A few years ago I dated a 25 yr old girl who made $18 an hour who was completely independent living in Southern California. She got no help from anybody and she worked in web design. She was very frugal.
I completely loved and respected her for that. She wasn’t looking to date guys for money but for a fair relationship.
Because the men who told you these things were (and most probably are) morons. Could you imagine an honest, mature and responsible person who seriously considers you for the long run NOT caring about your intelligence (official studies included ofc) and financial abilities? If you want to start a life with someone, shouldn't you know what kind of house/lifestyle/etc you should aspire for? That directly depends on your combined financial and educational abilities. In fact, the only men who don't care about such things are those looking for sex alone, or perhaps a trophy wife. Consider looking for worthy men rather than dim witted boys...
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