Why aren’t family relationships very important in the US and Europe?

[Anonymous]

I’m assuming it’s related to women’s rights somehow. It’s really sad to see homeless youth, homeless LGBTQ youth out on the streets like this in West. It’s really sad to see a family fall apart due to infidelity when sex has no actually value in any society. It’s not progressive or cool, it’s actually really sad.

[Soteris]

Its basically because the economy is crap. In previous generations a family could afford a 4 bedroom house by working a minimum wage job without an education and pay off their debts in a short amount of time. This is not because they worked harder or anything but because workers were simply paid a lot of money for their work. This also had the nice consequence of motivating these workers to provide really good service but that is besides the point.

Today young adults are not in a position to start a family. If they do not dedicate themselves to achieving a higher education and then work hard to climb the corporate ladder then they can't afford a comfortable living, much less to support a family. Even if they are in a relationship they are still both forced to work to achieve some sort of financial stability and that is just simply not a foundation where people feel comfortable to have kids even if they had the energy and mental happiness after draining themselves at work.

Capitalism has pushed the American worker to the absolute breaking point both in mind and body so of course the system is going to start fall apart, starting with the future of the nation.

This is not really as much of a problem in Europe, they have their own problems which would take hours to talk about as well.

[Asker]

It is a problem in Europe. I’m not talking about people not starting families I am talking about estrangement and divorce mostly. A lot of my family are from European countries and still live in them and they don’t talk to me, treat me like I am Hitler or something it’s actually worse because in the US you have no safety net so a lot of people are stuck in abusive relationships and friendships are slightly more important.

[Soteris]

As I said, the situation in Europe is very different. There are many different countries with each their own circumstances but the main point is that it has less to do with the actual financial issues than in USA.

To boil down the requirements for a good family we have the need for financial stability, the knowledge as well as free time to maintain a healthy relationship and a certain level of optimism for the future as well as personal mental wellness.

If we are talking about Europe then we can mostly put the financial requirements to the side. They are still not perfect but mostly they should not prevent a healthy relationship. That leaves the the problem with maintaining connections between people and maintaining your own mental health, both of which is suffering in Europe for different reasons.

For example, the older generations has done a really poor job of preparing the younger generations for the work that is required to maintain a relationship. Not to say this has been much of a subject in any generation since most of it has boiled down to halfassed ideas of how a gentleman should conduct themselves or how a lady should conduct herself which is not really helping. Rather, what saved most previous generations has been social practice from an early age.

Kids playing with other kids, forming relationships and childhood romances etc.. In the lack of theoretical wisdom they at least learned from constant social interactions. Not that they historically had good relationships because of this but some is better than less.

I could also talk about the poor mental health of people as well as the depressing worldview of the younger generations who can only witness the older generations burn the world they will inherit to the ground for their profit. There is not much to look forward towards in this regard.

[Asker]

There is creativity in mental illness. I don’t know how to fix that problem. It’s definitely based in an idea of equal rights but it’s not really equal for kids involved and the young people. I think most troubled are that way due to childhood trauma. The countries that are the worst for family relationships are the Netherlands, UK, and Scandinavian countries, and the best for family relationships seem to be Middle Eastern, African , and Southeast Asian countries.

[Asker]

Iceland, Switzerland, Spain, Germany, Belgium, Australia, family relationships are hard to keep, friendships are not as genuine, more infidelity, more estrangement, it’s not really progressive or equal though in the end of the of day because it hurts the most vulnerable, it hurts the next generation.

[Soteris]

Are you sure about that? I mean, for starters we have the happiness index that shows that people in countries like the Scandinavian countries are happier.

The problem as I see it is simply that with the birth of high technology we lost the one thing that forced people of earlier generations together to form friendly and romantic relationships and since no one was doing the right thing by themselves we could not adapt to the absence of this outside assistance.

Building relationships of any kind is not something magical or outside our understanding. There has been plenty of research into human psychology and such which can help us create more and stronger bonds with other people. We have just never actually implemented these things in the real world.

I mean seriously, think back to your own childhood. Were you taught how to express your emotions for example? Most guys are taught that they should not cry and internalize their stress and problems which is very harmful both for your own psyche but also to your relationships. Another example is that nothing in school prepares us for how to function in society or how to build and maintain your own happiness through personal growth and friendships. You are not taught how to be a human person that thinks but also feels and has desires and compulsions.

In modern day society, unless you teach yourself these things on your own time then you will just result into being a dysfunctional member of society that can't interact with people in a healthy way and that people do not want to be around.

And yes, people like this become some of the most vulnerable individuals in society. They are very easy to for example induct into cults, be they political or otherwise. Give them a group that they feel they can belong to and they will shape their beliefs into virtually anything to conform so that they are no longer alone.

[CozyCoffin]

Great question, I am not an expert however, I think the following reasons contribute to the weakening of the family system.

Many teenagers are forced to move out of homes right after they turn 18 or even before where as women live with parents until they are married in South Asia and the Far East.
Children are not taught well to respect the opinion of their parents, poor morals are taught in public schools and at home.

Cell phones, while a great device, has children either texting or talking on phones, while sitting together with parents and siblings.
The concept of homes for the elderly in US and certain European countries is killing the concept of the extended family structure. Grand children are unable to learn traditions and experiences experienced by their grand parents.

The concept of divorce taken very lightly in certain Western countries particularly the US.
In some ways the everyday life styles and work schedules of family members in the West do not permit family members to actually sit down and connect on an emotional level.
The simple habit of having an individual bedroom creates divide within families globally.
There are so many types of summer camps. Parents in the several Western countries send their children off to camps when they are still very young so they can have time to themselves. Although it is good for the children, the family is losing time to bond.

[MzAsh]

Most families don’t get along. Those with poor relationship skills procreate and a toxic family dynamic cycle continues.

[Asker]

Sounds trashy as hell.

[Asker]

I would like to be more optimistic than to think most families are just garbage like that. I think estranged has a feminist, progressive, tint to it. That tint makes it super trashy and disgusting.

[jshm2]

Because most of the time they have no idea of what a family actually is. From single mothers who raise kids without a father, to fathers who go out drinking and fuck even a step daughter, or half daughter.

It's a good thing they are choosing to die out naturally by going gay.

[laly520]

it is important for some
not all r the same