If you had a kid who was an adult and didn't have their shit together, around what age would you start questioning their general competence?

[Anonymous]

Shit together means have a steady career, license, own apartment, can cook for themselves, fix basic things. Since society can have different expectations than what it should be

25-26

27-28

29-30

31-32

33-34

Anything past 35

[FunkyMonkee]

Mid 30's if they're at least TRYING. If they're just sponging, early to mid 20's.
My nephew got arrested a few years ago when he was 28 years old!! Why? Graffiti!!! He has NO job or, if he does, it's some little part-time fly by night gig that won't last more than a couple months! Just enough to supply him with the money to buy more paint!! He was also into using heroine for a while a decade ago and was CONSTANTLY "borrowing" money from my mother to be able to buy the drugs!! EVERY DAY, "Grandma, can I have $20 for gas money?" until we found out it was actually being used to buy heroine.
However, I can't completely put the blame on him but he DOES get most of it. His stupid fucking dad was taking cold medicine AND booze late one night while driving in icy-road conditions and his car slid off the road when he fell asleep at the wheel and he killed himself when this kid was about 5 so, he never had a dad growing up and his mother (my ex-sister) was too busy going out to parties after that and getting drunk to be able to stay home for him and teach him right from wrong!! Mom bitched at her for leaving him home alone every night and all she would say was, "He's a big boy, he'll figure out for himself!".
OBVIOUSLY, he hasn't!!! In his mid 30's, now and he's STILL committing the crimes of a 16 year old!!
His cousin, my other nephew, on the other hand, got a job as a government sniper in D. C. by the time he was in his mid 20's!! From what I'm told, he's VERY good at it!

[madhatters4]

i'd say later 20s is when i'd REALLY start to worry. i know my mid 20s, while relatively productive (i was working full time, living on my own, owning a car) I was also socially just sort of untethered.

[exitseven]

When my kids graduated college I gave them a year to have fun and not be serious about a job. Then I was going to charge them room and board. My daughter worked 3 jobs while she was in college and she had saved enough money to put a down payment on a condo. The three of them took the year and travelled a little and had fun and afterwards they all moved out and found serious jobs and started their lives. I never got to collect a dime from any of them.

[Anonymous]

It depends what you mean by "💩 together" I think most people have no clue what they doing till they hit their 30's even then the learning curve can be slow with some people. So are we talking just beginning to get their 💩 together or having it all together

[live2dance25]

25-26. I know plenty who don’t have a license, can’t clean their place or pay rent on time, are about to get evicted, yet have money for gambling apps and booze.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Are you mad you haven’t moved out or something?