We are more disconnected than ever and social media & dating apps are RUINING society!

[HawkPerception]

I’m being a little hypocritical because here I am writing and posting this on social media myself, but oh well.

I think this is the point in society where everyone is realizing that social media and dating apps are having extremely negative impacts on society. Most of us that were lucky enough to live before all of this (the days of Google, Instagram, TikTok, Tinder, and other social/dating apps even became big) dream of the old days where we’d knock on our friend’s door or just walk in, head to the fridge, grab a snack and ask what they wanted to do. Not even just us. We like the idea of our friends just walking in and making themselves at home (well some of us anyways) because it’s a warmer feeling. Like family. Nowadays, it’s common courtesy to text when leaving or arriving. Ringing doorbells is strange and the only people that do ring doorbells are delivery people and salespeople. People generally feel weird approaching doors because of all the cameras and automated responses (or at least I do). When going on public transit, people tend to just sit, look at their phones and put their earphones/headphones in, and glare at others for looking in the direction with a “wtf are you looking at?” expression. People don’t talk as much in lines or waiting spaces either. We’re all on our phones scrolling on social media if friends aren’t available to chat with.

There are so many reasons why social media and dating apps are disconnecting society.

Superficial Connections - Social media and dating apps are more superficial connections for obvious reasons. Would you feel like you’re bonding to someone more if you’re sitting next to them or by texting them online?

Less Face to Face Interactions - You’re not reading anyone’s body language (facial expressions and gestures) or their tone of voice. That makes understanding context or jokes a fair bit harder sometimes. Sure you can facetime someone, but it’s not the same. Don’t get me wrong though. If your family is far away from you and you can’t meetup, facetime is great. There are bonuses to it.

Increased Loneliness - Obviously we’re more lonely. In this day and age where most people including us here on GaG would rather communicate with people online from the comfort of their homes and just give in to the title of introvert, there’s a lack of that connection. Because EVERYONE considers themselves an introvert. Most people desire that extroverted friend or partner that gets them out of their comfort zone/shell and shows them the light of life. Hate to say it, but we should all in a way aim to be that person. Be the light for others.

Less Privacy - This I absolutely hate. Kids nowadays feel they’re safe just by pulling out their phones and recording. There’s such a lack of privacy because it’s not just public security cameras you need to watch for anymore. It’s EVERYONE that has a phone, which is pretty much the majority of society in the west at this point. You can’t react to anything because if you’re recorded, your reputation instantly goes out the window. Even if you’re in the right, people cut and edit videos to change others perceptions of the scenario. It’s a scary day. Sure dash cams are great for seeing which car in an accident is in the right. But people can’t even walk without being recorded these days. A girl could be at the gym and working out and then you can walk by, just glance her way (as most people do walking through a gym) and post the video and call you a creep online. Or you could just be walking in public and a kid could slap your face or call you really offensive names and as soon as they pull out their phone to start recording, you can’t do anything because all they’ll show is an angry person chasing them. If you’re just walking in the mall, someone could be recording some TikTok dance then start making fun of your outfit online after they post it. It’s crazy nowadays.

Mental Health Impacts - Obviously this all impacts your mental health. Loneliness is a huge factor in depression. Seeing others post themselves looking happy in relationships or traveling can also affect your perception, thinking your life sucks and theirs are amazing.
Addiction - People scroll for hours on end on social media and dating apps. To the point where it takes up a large chunk of their lives.

Authenticity Issues - As said before, people tend to post themselves looking like they’re living “la vida loca” most of the time, which is not necessarily an accurate portrayal of their actual lives. A lot of “influencers” are actually depressed because they have to constantly live up to their audience’s expectations.

In my opinion, society’s current state does not resonate with the human soul. We should be more connected with nature and people.

[DizzyDesii]

I still keep my head down in my phone a lot but its mainly because i’m organizing things, not on social media. The first social media i was prob introduced to was MySpace when I was in 8th grade. I wasn't allowed to have one but my boyfriend secretly created one for me. I only used it to listen to music. He would plaster stuff all over my profile letting guys know i was taken. The one time i tried to talk in DMs with someone on there, I got hacked by jealous classmates and the entire school of girls was out to get me. Other than that, didn’t use MySpace. Never had Facebook. Tried Twitter but basically got jumped by America for commenting that I wouldn't “tip” rude waiters lol. Tried Twitter again and got jumped for saying a certain “singer” couldn’t sing for shit lol. Social media isn't for me. there's enough drama here on GAG and i dont even consider it social media. I refer to it as the “advice” site/blog. I barely associate with my irl friends so i def dont care too much to keep up with long distance online ones lol. Maybe every blue moon. If I’m disconnected from someone/society, ifs not because of social media. Its because im not a people person and rather focus on the things in life that make me feel happy

[DizzyDesii]

I hardly interact face to face in general unless I’m maybe dating someone. And even them I’d get tired of at some point so I wouldn't want to see them daily. I never really feel lonely unless its late night and im up bored. But im rarely bored. I dont think scrolling seeing others happy would hurt as much as people making rude comments towards anything you are happy to post. The bullying is what affects the. mental health rather than the window shopping. And yea the authenticity thing is an issue in general. I have in person family members who act as if they’ve got it going on but don’t. people have always “fronted” on and offline

[RavVid]

I was doing too much social interaction and stopped it this year. This person doesn't like that person - the people you know, the more problems you have is the way I see it now.

[DizzyDesii]

@RavVid i agree

[RavVid]

I'm glad some else sees it that way too. Thank you.

[DishLady]

Online and Social Media "addiction" have been the topics of conversation since the first BEEP-BOO-BEEP of the internet dialup. All the fears expressed back then have come to fruition and we're so blinded by the obsession with screen time that we don't see the forest for the trees, so to speak.

It's important to start pulling back, being more selective about the media platforms we choose to use, insist on accuracy, reliability, etc. Reduce the hours we spend feeding the addiction.

Like the truth-seeking individual in Plato's cave allegory, it's up to us to engage reality (and encourage others to do so) rather than allowing ourselves to be increasingly sucked into the fantasy realm. (With VR devices becoming more and more accessible, we've fallen EXACTLY into the pit of the ignorant lot in the cave allegory who are satisfied being fed fake news instead of engaging in reality... bc it's easier... and strength lies in numbers.)

So... is a lie believed by the masses becoming more valuable than reality? Hmm.

[RavVid]

Hmmh. When this first started I was amused that girls were going to cafes to facebook together instead of talking to each other. Not seeing that much now so maybe a corner is being turned.

It is quite certain that dating apps are having a major negative impact. I abstain from social media/dating apps so I might be very wrong. In our dreams, 100% of us would like to date the top 10% and we have the illusion of having a shot at it. It reduces it down to just the physical. IRL a girl's character and personality is the major attractant to me. So dating apps reduces things to a pretty trite level. How big are her tits, how tall is he?

It s also clear narcissism has increased substantially from all the likes that occur.

Porn shouldn't left out of this. As the quip goes, porn is enough like sex to keep men vaguely happy and social media is enough like love to satisfy girls.

I think where you started is we used to have much smaller social circles that were more intimate. More akin to our tribal days and family. Cities have an unnaturally large number of people in them. Maybe because I was raised in a remote farming district I think the more people you know then the more problems you have.

At the beginning of the year I deliberately cut down the socialization I do and am better for it. There something of a drug like nature to socialization. I don't really understand the loneliness aspect unless loneliness is being substituted for sexual intercourse.

I think you have done a superb job of analyzing this and brought up a lot of points I hadn't thought of.

[Ladsin2]

I agree with all the problems, but am unsure if Social Media is really the cause. I think it may just have exacerbated a preexisting trend of the last half century or more. We’ve moved from agrarian life where we lived in small-nit communities where we all believed and did the same things. We all lived with our families until we were able to build another house on the same property with our spouse and raise kids. Ever since the industrial revolution kids started leaving home and the isolation started there.

[Unit1]

And just like that AI Girlfriends were made. Who would have thought. No wonder at all.

Then again I believe it has more to do with people than it has to do with me in particular. I ain't pissing away my life online, on the phone or on social media.

I miss being on the sandy beaches.

[blueonblack22]

Social media and dating apps were initially cool when they first came out and they went to hell in a handbasket quickly after. Brainwashing, sexualization, addiction, isolation, crime and even hostile government influence (Chinese communist party and TikTok) has created a hell scape.

[MisterWack]

Social media and dating apps are an issue especially for the younger generations also future generations, there should be restrictions / punishments on these corporations.

Instagram was found out years ago to be feeding therapy & mental health advertisements on their platform knowing that internalized research of the company reached conclusion that social media is not good for one’s mental health so, they ran ads to make money. Microsoft admitted to doing just that by the way.

[Chazmatazz269]

I hate hypocrisy more than most. But there’s devil in the details of solutions. Christians have suggested that they find more absolution in drug dens and whorehouses than they do in churches and congregations. It’s where the term “Preaching to the choir” comes from.
You can’t convert those without sin, brother. Go forth!

[exitseven]

Maggie Jackson wrote a book called Distracted that deals with this. People can have a thousand Facebook friends and yet do not have one single person that they can talk about important matters with. We really are disconnected and people are lonelier than ever.

[genericname85]

the apps have no power if nobody uses them. it's us who are doing it. not the apps.

[HalalCabello]

Big Agree