Should we have a male version of Valentine’s Day?

[Anonymous]

The Valentine’s Day is all about the female.

Yes

No

[drummer]

So, here's the deal with Valentine's Day: it's traditionally all about showering love and affection, often with a bit of a lean towards romantic gestures for women from their partners. But who says men don't deserve a day filled with love, surprises, and maybe a bit of pampering too, right?

Actually, there is something kinda like a "male version" of Valentine's Day in some parts of the world. It's called White Day and is celebrated on March 14th, exactly one month after Valentine's Day. Originating from Japan, the idea is that if women give men gifts on Valentine's Day, men return the favor by giving gifts back to the women on White Day.

But let's think broader. Should there be a more globally recognized "Male Valentine's Day"? It could be a day for romantic gestures, sure, but also for recognizing all the roles men play in our lives—fathers, brothers, friends, mentors, and so on.

Imagine a day filled with simple acts of kindness, thoughtful gifts, or even just spending quality time together doing something they love. It doesn't have to be grandiose; sometimes, it's the little things that count the most. Like making them their favorite meal, planning a movie night with all their favorite flicks, or even just a heartfelt note about what they mean to you.

Of course, the spirit of Valentine's Day should ideally be gender-neutral, with love and affection flowing freely regardless of the day or the recipient's gender. But in the spirit of fun and celebration, having a day specifically to spoil the men could add an extra layer of joy and appreciation to our relationships.

[TruthBringer]

The fact that the vast majority of women said 'No' whereas men said 'Yes' is quite telling.

And why do the ladies don't think there should be a male version? Because you truly think that V-day is meant for BOTH? Oh please, when was the last time you heard a guy say "I hope I receive flowers or that my woman will get me something for V-day!". That's what WOMEN do. So let's not pretend that Valentine's day is not mainly marketed to please women, shall we?

Valentine's day is for women. Plain and simple. Because it is WOMEN who are mostly obsessed with it. Whereas for the men, they see it like another day of the year that they feel obligated to do or get something for their woman. Also, according to one study, 50% of women within the study reported that they are ready to dump their significant other if he doesn't get them something. I dare anyone to show me a study where a MAN is willing to do the same.

https://www.nydailynews.com/life-style/53-women-dump-lover-valentine-day-gift-article-1.2114301#:~:text=More%20than%2050%25%20of%20women,gift%2Dless%20lover%20the%20door.

So why do women disagree?

Simple: Double standards. Whether they want to admit it or not, V-day is catering to THEM. And a day for a man means that THEY will feel obligated to the responsibility they put on a man. Which is getting them gifts or doing something for them. If they truly were for 'equality' then they would have voted 'Yes'.

Because heaven's forbid that men have a special day where they are getting spoiled by their women just as women have that special day for themselves every year other than their birthday.

[Red-Blaze]

I have to say I don't think I agree at least from my own point of view
And also say I did not buy in any VDay except if really did not have the time, will always make something
And by the way your poll dose say something, it shows a big group of man don't *want* anything
I completely agree about the marketing, but.. you know.. its marketing!! they will go for the most profitable way, but hey maybe soon they will eqrlize and get the idea "woman got money as well..." then we see some woman to buy marketing go wider, just a question what company break that

The day it self should totally be for both, and honestly if any woman out there see it as a one way street she got a problem, as it may show how they see the relationship

So or so marketing you should know don't tell reality, if you want one example go for the video game marketing going for boys when it started

[Asker]

@Red-Blaze The probable reason, behind men, don't want anything is cause we don't aspect anything. The only thing we get from our mothers is a Valentine's day card and some of our favorite candy.

[Anonymous]

Voted "No." Not because I have any strenuous objection to the idea but because it seems pointless. Valentine's Day is for both sexes.

My s/o and I celebrate the day - actually we take a long weekend away together - and give each other gifts and just spend time enjoying each other's company. I love her with all my heart and she loves me and we just see the day as kind of a fun - and admittedly sort of cheesy - way to celebrate that love.

It would never have occurred to either of us to see it as a day for the other except in the sense that we care about each other and see it as a chance to show that affection. She means everything to me and I don't worry that I am doing more or less for me that I am for her.

It is about us, not about me.

As far as when we were dating, I took the initiative because that is what the guy does. Men are less known for showing their feelings and so, for me, it was a chance to do something special and out of the ordinary. Not because I was a man, per se, but because it is a day to do something special.

So, again, while I have no objection to the idea - we do, by the way, have Mother's Day and Father's Day - I don't see the need. It is a misreading of Valentine's Day to call it a "female holiday."

[Asker]

Now women wants to get rid of Father's Day. That's a fact.

[Opinion Owner]

So? It is not likely to happen and the fact that they want Father's Day abolished does not thereby make the case for a "male Valentine's Day." At least not unless you want to turn holidays into "tit for tat" affairs.

Thanks, I'll pass. In fact, my s/o and I are leaving for our long Valentine's Day weekend in the morning. So we will leave things just as they are.

[Anonymous]

First, it's not a women's holiday. It's a couples' holiday. Two men in a relationship may celebrate it. And I've done and given things to my boyfriend on Valentine's Day. It's not about giving gifts but celebrating love together. It's become traditional for guys to give something to female partners, but it's not a "women's" holiday.

The bigger question is, if some guys feel that it's a female holiday (and you're entitled to your opinion) then why should it be a contest to try to even the playing field? Nothing's being taken away from guys here. In a relationship each person should want to treat each other well, not just with gifts but with actions and emotions.

Would you consider a wedding between a man and a woman to also be a female event since the bride usually wears an expensive gown, holds the bouquet, and gets the majority of the attention? No, because it's not about that. It's about the marriage and love between two people. On a much smaller scale, Valentine's Day is a celebration of love in which it's become a cultural norm for a man to give a woman flowers or candy or a gift. But if the man is invested in the relationship he should be happy to do it, and not try to find a way to get what he perceives as his fair share.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

It doesn’t even need to be a couples’ day. Love can be for friends, comrades, and romantic partners. I used to celebrate it even before I had romantic partners or crushes. Elementary schools advertise it. I remember giving my 55-year-old nanny, Who was married, a Valentine at age five.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

@Part2603 A homosexual couple can adopt. There’s nothing wrong with that. Even a heterosexual couple, like if Noura and I can be together, can choose not to bear, as We’re antinatalists.

[Red-Blaze]

Since when is it a day for woman? its a day for copules and romanticans it has no sex
I mean sure its market more to woman, or man to do for woman, but that is what the market show works, becouse honestly man are easy to please, and still think woman needs cash for romance that is just not that
But if you belive and full for the marketing...

The best romantic action I ever had was a guy that just made stuff from paper, they learn it, and made flowers and stuff from it, that was fantastic more then any grand exspincive stuff (paper as old newspaper and stuff that made it so much more intresting)

Only thing that makes it woman is the marketing not the day it self, and not what anyone should see

[Asker]

You don’t see women making their men happy. The only women who buys stuff are the men’s mothers.

[Asker]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MOuq1dLfubQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QKsg9PPTgAI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MUQm49KQhqs

[Red-Blaze]

I can't tell if you read nothing I said or have an odd way to say you agree (YouTube videos showing ads)
An and when I had a boyfriend so far I made them something for v-day
buying stuff honestly so less romantic

Regardless "making happy" and "buying stuff" are you from a marketing agency?
And you see if you look, you don't if you pick and choose so
V-Day is all sex day not one sex over any outher

[KittyKat90210]

@Red-Blaze i love that!

[Red-Blaze]

@KittyKat90210
Thanks
Just saying what I experience and what I know nothing more

[HippieVeganJewslim]

It doesn’t even need to be a couples’ day. Love can be for friends, comrades, and romantic partners. I used to celebrate it even before I had romantic partners or crushes. Elementary schools advertise it. I remember giving my 55-year-old nanny, Who was married, a Valentine at age five. Love ain’t always romantic love.

[Red-Blaze]

That is a good point @HippieVeganJewslim
As much as I know VDay so far was mostly for the romantic type, but maybe I just missed informed :)

[HippieVeganJewslim]

I doubt not that it is indeed usually a romantic love holiday. However, many do get confused with love and romantic love. I’d rather lose my romantic partner than lose my best comrade.

[Red-Blaze]

Well im good partnership i do feel they be one in the same

[Red-Blaze]

Thanks for MHO

[MrOracle]

We already do - Steak & BJ Day.

And the reason that day exists is because Valentine's Day is DEFINITELY for the benefit of women rather than men - it's impossible to argue otherwise. Now, to be fair, us guys don't mind that it's about the women - we don't mind having a reason to do something nice for our girl. But to deny that it's expressly designed to benefit women is dishonest.

I've easily spent over $10,000 on Valentines presents and trips over the years, compared to perhaps $500 spent on me. That's not a complaint - I am not looking for gifts or for her to spend a bunch of money on me - and it's not just the money - it's lots of planning, it's sacrificing work days (including a couple of entire projects), and it's going places and doing things that I would never choose myself, because it's what she likes. Again, no regrets, but it's never happened the other way around, and I've never heard of a guy I knew, in any age group, to have had their girl do something special for him.

Again, I don't think any guy here is complaining about the way it is, but when women pretend that it's not in women's favor, that really rubs me the wrong way.

[BCA6010]

Valentine's Day is derived from the Catholic feast day for Saint Valentine, going all the way back to the 8th century (Valentine himself lived in the 3rd century), though since 1955, feast days for Catholic saints have been reduced to simply commemorative celebrations.

I'm all for just making it a feast day again.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

Are You saying that Protestants/Mormons/YHWH’s Witnesses have no St Valentine’s Day, or St Tatiana’s Day?

[BCA6010]

@HippieVeganJewslim if you want to get very technical, the Orthodox Christians commemorate Saint Valentine in July rather than February, and only the Anglican and Lutheran churches recognize him outside of those two. Saint Tatiana's commemoration is in January and has nothing to do with Valentine's Day, or Saint Valentine himself.

[SnowedIn]

No. Valentine's Day is a woman's holiday or by/for/about women. Is it a weird, messed up holiday? Yes. But we don't need genderized versions of it -- we need to get rid of it. If we think we should be buying cards and teddy bears and chocolates and roses and lingerie for our lovers, then we ought to do that year round.

[DizzyDesii]

Men buy gifts just to shut their girlfriend up. So how is the day not about satisfying themselves by keeping the ole hag quiet? 🤣 They buy sexy lingerie for us to wear FOR THEM. They buy us chocolates then they eat half of them. I think its their holiday too dude

[DizzyDesii]

I even make gift baskets for my men and try to be drama free for the day lmao

[Rathoreshivraj]

What about roses, teddies?

[DizzyDesii]

@Rathoreshivraj i love teddies and singke roses. Bt that doesn't make the day about me. They give me those things and i give them a gift basket of their fave snackd and items, similar to these

[Rathoreshivraj]

I have only seen that boy is making efforts on girls

[DizzyDesii]

@Rathoreshivraj well you must be half blind

[Rathoreshivraj]

May be
And may be not
Other half never come in front of me

[NewsReader]

Even though "Steak & BJ Day" is satire, it should be turned into a real holiday. Just change the "BJ" part to something more youth-friendly by name.

[PBandJ_Nerd]

Sometimes it depends on where you live. I think maybe we should have a "Brotine's day" much like how there's a Galentine's day for women & her lady friends.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

Galentine = Gal + Valentine - V? What’s up with Brotine’s Day, then? Bro + Valentine - Valen?

[PBandJ_Nerd]

@HippieVeganJewslim Galentine's Day is a day before Valentine's day where women (whether single or partnered) go out and be with their lady friends to celebrate their friendship. Brotine's could be just like this, except it's for guys and their guy friends to celebrate their friendships. But the brotine's thing is just my attempt at making an equivalent sounding name.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

Both of those celebrations are appropriate for St Valentine’s Day.

[PBandJ_Nerd]

@HippieVeganJewslim Most definitely. And people say February is a month only for couples. I just proved that all wrong.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

Weird. So as soon as January ends, March begins for singles, according to those folks? Do they also reckon that March is only for the Irish? ☘️

[PBandJ_Nerd]

@HippieVeganJewslim They could think that. But I doubt it since everyone seems to be happy wearing clovers, gold, and green while drinking. But on the other note, my mom gets my dad something for Valentine's day, usually caramel popcorn & pecan turtles.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

Nu, I drink no alcohol, and would wear green the seventeenth because I kissed at least four Irish lasses. I’m not superstitious, but I like it for fun. Since Your mum gives Your dad sweets, St Val’s Day ain’t for just for women indeed!

[PBandJ_Nerd]

@HippieVeganJewslim Some couples need more communication than others. That's the issue some of these men are probably having.

[exitseven]

Yes, there should be a day when the guy gets a steak and a blowjob.

[TrueConfection]

Is there a specific order to which those are given? I don't mean "well done".

[exitseven]

@TrueConfection hahahahhah well done. I think the steak first and dessert later.

[TrueConfection]

I told my husband about your idea. He loved it. 😂 He wants to know when the best time of year is for the new holiday.

I suggested the day after Valentine's Day. 😈

[lightbulb27]

Yes, lets have a national "Penis" day, kinda like Japan. What could go wrong?

come to think of it... no...

[OlderAndWiser]

Why do you let society decide what Valentine's Day is for you? If you want to be appreciated by your woman on VD, let her know!

[AviatorTom]

Valentines Day is non-sexual. Both men and women can be valentines... lovers.

[Guy13]

The male version is Valentines avoidance day.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

There already is a day & it’s on the 14th of March & it’s called Steak & A Blowjob Day.

[TrueConfection]

Sounds good! Should we cook him dinner and buy him a bouquet of beer? 😋

[Anonymous]

"Women expect to be treated to about $154 worth of V-Day treats, but only end up spending around $64 for their SO. A stat from another Valentine's Day spending survey from WalletHub really drives this home: Women are 33 percent more likely than men to spend nothing, while men are twice as likely to spend over $100. And in 2018, men spent almost twice as much as women did on a significant other ($196 versus $100)"

https://www.theknot.com/content/valentines-day-spending-study

I always get a chuckle when women claim Valentine's Day is for both men and women. I mean a few women actually walk that walk, but most don't. A better name for it would be Female Entitlement Day.

[HighValue]

What Valentine's Day really is, is a way for men to see how unfair, thoughtless, uncaring, and greedy their significant other really is.

It is pretty simple. If she gets angry for the man not doing something for her or giving her something that she also did NOT do for the man, then she is a selfish hypocrite and it is best to end the relationship right then.

Valentine's Day can actually do men a big favor if they pay attention to all of their partner's actions and words. It will show how the relationship would be if you stayed together long term.

A good partner wouldn't expect any more from you than they are willing to do themselves.

[Chazmatazz269]

Of course, but it will never happen. “Romance” is strictly about what men are doing to please women. Never the other way around. Men who are pleased are pigs, misogynists, selfish, controlling, abusive, etc. Women who invest any amount of time pleasing men are similarly disparaged in a wide variety of ways; pick-me, slut, internalized misogynist, naive. There’s never a nice word for a good woman or a happy man, at least not from other women and feminists. That doesn’t seem like equality to me.

[Dargil]

On the Catholic calendar, Saint Valentine's day celebrates the patron saint of love, romance and (!) Beekeepers.

Its a say for females and males. Roses for her, and...

[HippieVeganJewslim]

Not for me. That’s more evidence I ain’t a man.

[BeMuse]

Make up and celebrate whatever holidays you want. If you don't like Valentine's day, the simple solution is to not celebrate it. Do you also celebrate the Hajj and Rosh Hashanah just because they exist, or are you like nah I don't believe in or care about that and just move on with life like it's any other day.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

I want to celebrate the Muslim festivals (they are called Eids, and Hajj is the Pilgrimage to Makkah) and the Hebrew New Year. I celebrate St Val’s Day not not because I ain’t a woman, but for other (historical) reasons. Anyway, You’ve good reasons.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

If you think Valentine’s day is all about pleasing your female partner, you have a really warped idea of what romance is.

[TruthBringer]

That's a bold claim you make, because reality shows that it IS all about pleasing the female partner. The fact that there was a study that shows that half of the women are willing to dump their partner for not getting them something for V-day shows you who truly has a warped idea of what romance is.

So in what way is realizing and acknowledging that V-day revolves around pleasing the woman being synonymous with having a "warped idea of romance", when that is the literal fact of reality?

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

@TruthBringer It's more the idea that romantic gestures are only to please a woman, as if there isn't a man who wouldn't be happy to see his partner going out of their way to get him something special for a special occasion. Valentine's Day is meant to celebrate the romantic connection a couple shares in a way that they both see as important. Not every couple celebrates, some couples do, and if couples have different ideas then that requires communication and understanding. The idea that romance is purely for women, rather than something both men and women desire in their relationships, is a very unhealthy way for someone to view romance in general.

[TruthBringer]

Indeed, V-day is meant for both people, sadly the reality clearly shows it caters more towards women and that it is women who care more about getting something from their partner than the men.

Nobody said romance is purely for women. That's a strawman argument you're using. Nobody put that narrative out there. People are clearly saying that V-day is primarily catering to WOMEN, hence why the question whether there should be a day for men. And the irony is, the majority of women seem to disagree that there should be a day for men, whereas the men feel different. This goes to show that men feel left out on Valentine's day and truly believe it mainly caters to women.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

You say that like women are responsible for the commercialism of the holiday, as if lingerie sales don’t spike like hell along with sex toys for women to use on men in the bedroom.

[TruthBringer]

That's funny because if women weren't the ones who demanded men to buy them stuff, then this commercialism you're complaining about wouldn't be as it is today. And the lingerie sales argument is not really a good one considering that Valentine's day gifts don't seem to revolve around those gifts for the most part. In fact, lingeries and sex toys make up the lower ranks. It is things like flowers, giftcards and candy that are the actual marketing as we can see below:



So far, everything points to the fact that V-day revolves around women far more than men. So what's the issue of having a day specially for men then? Does it hurt you so much that there is a day specially for men?

[Asker]

@TruthBringer Women hate the father's day too.

[Anonymous]

No. I don’t need one day out of the year to be shown that my girl loves me. She does it everyday. To whoever say Valentine’s Day is a couples day, that’s a crock of shit. It’s geared toward women by corporations who play on their feelings to guilt men into getting their women things. Because I’d you don’t you’re an asshole. Everything is directed toward women. These companies play on their feelings.