Is there any good guys out there?

I will answer your question, and you can listen to the rest

of these human bodies with d***s, or you can listen to me.

Girls seek something different unconsciously, they constantly

test guys even when they don't really take time to think about it.

99% of the guys play the nice guy sweet game with a girl, and if

you think about it, girls get hit up by guys on a daily basis up to 25

times a day if you're somewhere up on that scale you should be

getting somewhere near that number. The thing is, that women

nowadays get so bored and even turned off by the indifferent idiots

who try to seduce them and get their little d***s wet...

If you look at it from an ‘economic’ standpoint, it

doesn’t benefit women at all to have their man running

around having sex with other women. She can only be

pregnant with one child at a time, and she can only raise

a limited number at a time. So having a man who’s out

spreading his seed is BAD BAD BAD for business for her.

I personally believe that men are hard-wired to look

for sexual opportunities and seek out sexual variety.

My perspective is that sleeping with different women

breaks no ‘law of the universe’, and it’s not an ethical

dilemma for me. Any objections that are in existence

were created mostly to control and not to liberate. My

perspective is also that it’s important to be honest with

people about your views. And yes, this means talking to

women about them. In my life, I’ve mostly had long-term

girlfriends. And if I tell a woman that I’m going to be

faithful, then I am. So instead of telling people that they

are making wrong judgments about YOU, check yourself

before you make judgments about the 1% of the guys who

are like me, and MAYBE you'll find the right one...Good Luck!

Like most girls your age you are probably retarded when it comes to judging guys and deciding which kind you like. No offense. Most girls have male "friends" they reject and ignore to chase after the assholes and then they complain to that nice supporting friend(I am that guy usually) ANd its frusturating as hell for us. Yeah we want sex too though. The "nice guys" who get walked all over are wanting someone to make out with and make love too as well there's no shame in that. They are kinda insecure for them it has a lot to do with their self esteem they are wishing a women wouldn't just see him for having an interesting conversation helping with her homework "being like a brother to her" but as someone exciting romantic and/or sexy. I have always wanted to be both. A lot of girls have told me your a good friend lets just be friends. So its like If I never want to get laid I can just keep being who I really am but If I wanted you to be my actual girlfriend Ishould never been friendly to you in the first place Well blah blah I don't want to complain too much about the bullsh*t of high school days. Other than to say a lot of girls are cold ego boosting players themselves with no respect for men or their feelings and though it is basically true we are all horny with strong sexual urges many of us care about women on a deeper level as well. Sure sometimes I find a girl sexy who I don't care about but on the flip side If I care about a girl a lot and she's not way younger or older than me I tend to find her sexually attractive. I think a lot of guys are afraid to show their feelings and be more gentle romantic because they have gotten rejection and pretty harsh expectations from other guys and girls. No guys whos not gay wants to be called gay. And women are part of the problem here. They are stuck on a hollywood version of "real men" and through their cold shoulder they punish guys who don't conform to it and reward those that do.

There ARE good guys out there... Trouble is, you girls just let us slip right under the radar, because we're not "fun", meaning: loud, obnoxious, arrogant, cocky, or cause a bunch of unnecessary drama...

Us good guys, may be a little quieter, shyer, maybe sometimes a little awkward. But I'll tell you one thing we have that the cocky jerk doesn't have... A heart. It's us good guys that are in relationships for the right reasons, that let ourselves be vulnerable like anyone in love should. It's too bad that most girls are so used to being with "Mr. Tough Guy" (or some guy that can't even respect himself, let alone his girl) that they don't see the value in our shyness or awkwardness or us making ourselves vulnerable if we DO actually work up the courage to make a move on her...

Instead, it's a lot of good guys getting labeled as creeps or "weird" because of our good nature and putting ourselves out there... Any REAL man will show his emotions, especially to the one he loves. It's not about being "Mr. Macho" or looking for someone to "fix" because they have a million issues. It's about finding someone that is ALREADY good enough for you and that you can be vulnerable around each other and trust each other and be emotional together. To me that would be the greatest relationship.

The sad thing is, a lot of people don't know what it means to LOVE... all the world seems to know anymore is LUST. It's in our popular music, our entertainment... LUST is, sadly, glorified in our society and it has an effect on most. LOVE is something different.

Do good guys exist? Most certainly... You just need to open your heart to new and different things/people/etc. It's a shame a lot of us good guys have to wait around a while for love, girls are most definitely missing out. But I guess there's a time and a place for everything.

As Olympia Dukakis said in Moonstruck "its the fear of death and getting old" that men cheat...they feel as if they can cheat death by cheating with other girls...now being a guy who has never cheated I can tell you that there is a part of our nature that it is inherent and uncontrollable for us to consistently think about sex the majority of the time -it just happens but what we can control is how we deal with those thoughts...by not acknowledging that we have those thoughts 99.9% of the time is purely denial of our sexual nature...I know about the whole "player syndrome" that the guy thinks if he can sack "x amount of girls" it makes him more of a man when in reality this makes him less of one and more like a pathetic bro-ho on 53rd and 3rd turning tricks, its done not for the betterment of himself but to impress his friends which makes the whole act of doing that purely an act and kind of gay. Now when you say that you are losing faith that there are no more good guys out there I can only say you ought to hold steadfast becuase there are more than plenty left...but itll probably be tough going to find one in a bar. Make some new guy friends because typically before I ask a girl out I become friends with her because the friendship (if its healthy and she and I have the chemistry) it grows into something more. Also when I talk about a guy thinking about sex the majority of the time there is a time that he should let it out and a time he should keep his pride tucked -my motto is if I've been going out with a girl for a while and she and I both have not only a healthy relationship one based on trust and compromise and our liking is turning into loving then sex is ok but in all other cases unless I am super drunk or stoned and can't remember anything the next morning then I keep those thoughts to myself.

They ARE out there. The problem is that women label them as "Clingy", "Boring", "Too Easy", "Not Fixable" or whatever utter bullshit that can be thought of.

"Clingy" meaning that you get easily annoyed by the attention YOU sought for then hold it against him when he still gives you that same amount of attention you now don't want or need weeks later.
"Boring" meaning not a drunk, stupid, brainless or anything in that regard.
"Too easy" meaning you are expecting the worst or something to go wrong then hold the first or smallest thing against him and make him feel less of a human being for it.
"Not Fixable" meaning he doesn't have faults like a "bad boy" and you don't have anything to make better (which FYI you will NEVER fix a jerk. Once a jerk always a jerk).

You really want a nice guy? Stop labeling them with these terms and give them a chance instead of finding a reason not to. You'd be amazed how simple it would be to find one if you stop following useless trends and making good guys look horrible for no proper reason (Sorry but being "Clingy" or "Not Fixable" isn't a reason its an excuse for being lazy and not wanting to put the effort in to try and work through it). I could bet my next paycheck that you already know of a guy like this but you did this to him already. THAT'S the good guy you have been looking for but made excuses not to give him a chance he deserves.

Honestly, most guys love sex. We really are crazy for it. It takes a little while to get that under control: eventually we work out that the best sex is with people we love.

Now if you have some issues trusting guys, I can't blame you. Because, honestly, you don't have issues - you have experience. And you have experience of some curious world in which cheating is the norm. And, honestly, cheating is not the norm - and certainly not in the full-on and shameless way you describe. Try a different social circle. Or try a guy who's a little older, and will be more able to appreciate you.

Yes unfortunately a good male is hard to find these days. I know a lot of d*** bags.. who treat female poorly and or are just looking for sex. Us "Good guys" are out there. Hard to find but there. I know it looks pretty dismal but these experiences are what shape you into who you are and your likes and dislikes. life ain't easy. and you gotta work and look for what you want it won't just come to you. besides what would be the fun in that? So keep your head up and keep looking you will find the right guy eventually.

Good luck

-Deathecutioner

It's the basic problem with guys that are just plain garbage. It always kills me to see a sweet girl be with a guy who just doesn't derserve her at all. Girls are like treasure and they deserve to be treated as such. The truth is, as some other guys have posted here, is that girls overlook the good guys because well, we're just shy and it's usually the overconfident guys that are the douchebags.

A girl to me derserves to be treated like a goddess. Sex should be at the bottom of things to do. For me, an ideal girl would just want to cuddle, talk for hours about complete nonsense, go walking in the park even if it's chilly outside because the warmth of our bodies would heat each other up. I've yet to find that girl, but I know that there are more good girls out there than guys. If a guy is looking for sex right out of the get go, that should be a major red flag because that means that sex is the only thing on his mind and chances are, he'll end up hurting you.

There are good guys out there, you just have to look past the exterior.

There are plenty of good guys out there. I like to consider myself a stand up gent. I don't cheat, I'm not one of those douche bags who stands for minutes staring at a girl who walks by. No I'm not gay, I was just raised differently. I respect women. And I can honestly say that I could give a flying f--- about sex. I'd rather have a girl who I can share everything with (ex.my fears and aspirations). Someone to snuggle with,especially in these cold ass winter months.

So like everyone else has said on here, yes good guys are out there. Just don't be stupid like some women and seek assholes and dudes who treat you like sh*t.

I won't lie to you, most men are selfish scumbags. Well, frankly all people are selfish scumbags in different ways. With men it generally manifests as being horny, senseless, inconsiderate morons. Just like women are selfish in being needy, controlling, whiney, etc. There are quality men out there, but it requires patience and self-control from you. If you want the right guy, you need to be willing to wait for him to appear (you aren't going to find him, he's going to find you). That means waiting to see if he's a scumbag BEFORE you get involved with him. Generally maturity plays into it a lot too. American men aren't mature anymore, and they aren't required to be...because easy, needy, emotionally distraught (or just loose) women enable them to act this way.

The moment you stop obsessing over finding a good mate is the moment one will find you.

-Count D.

Uh Uh Uh.. Me! Me! Me! *jumps around*

Just kidding.

You see, there is no Mr. Perfect in this world.. as well as Mrs. Perfect.

Each one has different faults.

Now, I ask you a question..

Which one do you prefer: Boys? or Men?

Boys want short term relationship where they can fulfill their lust and desire FROM the girls.

Men want long term relationship where they can provide love and protection FOR their women.

Oh.. and men also like discussion too =)

If your experiences are related to boys boys and boys, then don't assume men are also boys.

Hope this helps.

Cheers,

FS

Like Drummerdude said, Girls look for guys in all the wrong places, I can't count the number of times a girl I liked then went out with some douche that treated her like crap, and I ask myself ...why? But there are nice guys out there, just you may be looking in all the wrong places...for instance, that nerd that's quiet and mostly keeps to himself could be the one, but you'll never know because you're (not youlol) going out with the douchey asshole jerk.

sorry to sound rude but it's the truth, I see girls date douches all the time and then they come to people like me and cry and say why did that happen, and I want to tell them so bad that I saw it coming. Then they get emotionally stable and go through the whole thing again.

Well I don't have any guy friends because like you, I find them to all be reprehensible. Even as they put on a show of being decent, you can immediately tell that there's something slimy and rotten at the bottom of their souls. So I'm with you. Men are largely worthless.

Problem is, the guys that don't want to get in your pants from first talking usually are the ones that also are so used to rejection that they don't try approaching girls romantically, and just friendly.

They can't find you since they already figure you'll either turn them down, or with someone else basically. Good guys that actually actively go out in aim to try picking up a girl is like picking the winning lottery numbers tell the truth.

In other words, see the guys that act friendly to you but never approach or do things to catch yoru attention? Yup, you'll just keep on ignoring em.

I'm studying neuroscience and psychology, but that aside for now, from my personal experiences, both genders, if given the right circumstances, will sleep with each other despite being in a serious relationship. We are made this way as many have answered, and you are made to be attracted to the dominant, aggressive, confident male whose underlying objective is to sleep with as many women as possible. Because they can. Men who cannot often are not worth your time, even though they will be loyal.

The more high demand --> the less prone a person is to dedicating oneself completely to any particular demand. We seek novelty and learning/experiencing new things. If we can do this, we will.

Nature doesn't care about who gets hurt or abused or cheated on as long as it can perpetuate itself.

Hey don't worry yourself... I'm a great guy. At least 99% of me is pretty damn sure that you are coming home with me tonight... The other 1% is thinking about your friend. Hell I'd probably even tap your mother if I could. The male species is born to screw... And this f***ing brother is gonna tap that!

This is the mindset of most "men"... How do I know? ... because I am one of the many men who started off a nice guy only to get f***ed over by a woman. For years I was dead set on revenge and never wanted to be a victim again. Only I grew up... Hopefully one day you'll find a reformed character. but remember this. Most guys that treat you like a **** probably got f***ed by one themsleves so the female species only have themselves to blame. Amen.

If there is a "nice guy" in the "bad boy" package, I'll die from laughter.

I've also understood that there's this insane compulsion that women think they can change a man. Total bullsh*t, but those women keep trying.

So I recommend the following to you and whomever is in this scenario :

- THINK ABOUT EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT IN A GUY

- PRIORITIZE THEM

If you want a good looking man with a good heart, which part do you want more?

Try looking for a good hearted man who's attractive. See what I did there... psychology :)

Also : try nerds. 99% of them are very good hearted and they would never try to flirt with your attractive girlfriends.

Yours truly,

A nerd.

Yes they're out there... Here's one right here! ;)

The thing is, we end up walking right under your nose, and girls just pass us by. We're like invisible to girls. Shame because I have a lot to give... You need to open up your eyes to different guys. Guys that maybe aren't as sexually appealing at "first sight". Get to know a good, shy, down-to-earth guy and give him a chance to open up and be himself.

It just takes an open heart.

I just want to get this out there.

Change your display picture.

You don't need to be showing guys your t*ts when you tell them you want a dream guy.

That's just hilarious.

And 2. You should read. "I hope they serve beer in hell."

Now take that and ask yourself this question.

Women have no faith in guys.

And guys have no faith in women.

You have to be mature enough to find someone that you can settle down with.

And stop with all the excuses and bullsh*t drama that people go through nowadays.

It's all a waste of time, and I hate people who waste my time personally.

So just think about everyone else.

Sorry to say that road rounds both ways honey, I was once a nice looking guy and women would flaunt all over. I then had a spinal injury in the millitary and was crippled, in those 2+ years I only had one girl notice me. I recently recovered and I'm back to before, such experience opens your eyes that society is all vanity based. Life is inherenlty a beatuy pageant I would say, the allure ofobeauty then drives sex from a psychological aspect. And I would agree with the best anaswer as someone whoes lived both sides and is also educated in psych. Women are just as shalloow as men, ans like best asnwer said women look for men in the wrong enviromnemts and there attracted to the wrong facets of interaction dynamics. So I would ask are there any good people out there?

Why is it so bad to want sex with more than one beautiful woman? Perhaps you make to much of sex -- which is really just about evolutionary survival. A guy can love you, and want to be in a long-term relationship with you, but still want sex with other pretty girls. Perhaps you should not try so hard to find that "good" one (who often is just a guy so unappealing, he attracts no other females), but rather re evaluate why YOU are so hung up on sex. By the way -- message me and maybe we can hook up!

I'd like to say I'm a "good guy" but I cheated... sort of. (It's a long story and it didn't happen like your typical movie).

But moving on.

There are "good guys" the problem is, when guys are about 16-20 they learn, really fast, that girls don't like good guys. Sure, they'll like them as a friend, but they tend to go after 'bad guys'. The good guys go home cry into their Twilight books and turn gay. (Or something like that).

More seriously, if you want a "good guy" you'll have to hang out in the right places. A singles bar is probably just going to find guys looking for a shag, potentially cheating on their wives. Where as a open mic nightclub, church (if that's your thing), supermarket, some sort of school (learn Italian class eg), and so on is where you'll find a good guy.

As a real simple rule. A good guy is a nerd (not always, but you get the idea). Flock to where nerds are and you'll find one.

Not all guys are cheaters, and I'm too lazy to read all the replies you have gotten.

I personally have never cheater on a girlfriend, nor will I. In fact, I had a girlfriend cheat on me!

If you want to find a nice, decent guy, find a nerdy one - lol! Nerdy guys will be appreciative to have a girlfriend and will worship the ground you walk on. Plus, you can fix up his nerdy appearance, find better clothes, etc - nerdy guys usually clean up to look like your normal guy with the added bonus of being deeply attached to you.

So, where to meet nerdy guys? Ballroom is a good place to start looking, I would guess 80% engineers (plus the can dance). You'd never find a nice nerdy guy at a bar, or club, or probably even a starbucks! See if there are robotics events in your area, that would attract nerds.

I can also tell you that all of my friends have never cheated in a relationship!

let me tell you something missy lol the world has a balace to it...thir are equally as many good guys out their as ther are good girls...dont blame the gender, blame the person...or you culd go deeper and ask yourself why your onli attracting garbage...mayb ur looking for it..i dunno, I'm just saying.

but wot I've noticed with gyals is that they talk a lot of bullsh*t about personality blah blah...gyals want the same things guys want a fit partner with not 2 many bad traits...girls just tend to be relly bad judges of what they can control.

I like to count myself as one of the good guys.

I'm waiting for marriage, so sex is kind of a moot point right now. Actually, I was cheated on and in a pretty emasculating way, so I know how horrible it can feel.

Know that you're seeing boys. Not real men. I think once you find someone like you, (not a romantic relationship necessarily) you may be able to see more hope first hand, instead of hearing it from guys you don't know.

I thought I was worthless and stupid based on how a lot of people treated me - then I met my best female friend - I joke that she's an older female version of me. And that gives me hope for MY future, as she really has her life together. As bad as things get, I have her as my friend; and I know that either there's at least one other nut job out there who I can have hang out with, or there's another sane person in a crazy world. It's calming.

You see all those guys in the bar that NEVER approach you? Those are the ones that won't treat you like this. Yet you often sit in the corner and wait to be approached right? But guess who approaches you. A player. A good amount of guys don't have enough nerve to just jump into your life. For all they know you could be taken, really busy, or even gay. And if it's the first one and Mr. Fabulous walks in while he makes his move it won't end well. If you walk up to him, he's taken and the girl is even sitting next to him... What's the chance she's going to go off and punch you in the face? Men really are defensive and most likely would react in some way. Either it be just chasing them off or an actual fight, a lot of guys will have this insecurity... nevermind being turned down just-because..

Unfortunately, the majority of guys your age are still very immature and thus aren't interested in a serious relationship. It sounds like nearly all of the guys you know are complete jerks... but believe me when I say that there are some good guys out there -- it just may take awhile (and longer than it should really) to find them.

P.S. Do you know many shy guys? They tend to be all-around better guys than most others, especially at your age.

I'm sex crazy, but I've never cheated. A lot of guys use their sex drive as an excuse to disregard their partners feelings. Knowing how much it would hurt me if she cheated, I would not want to put her through anything like that. But I know my level of empathy for others is higher then most guys.

If your are hot, a guy will hit on you. Sorry you're hot... Blame your parents not us. But you have to say to these guys what you want or this will continue... Communication is paramount. SPELL It OUT FOR THEM or shut up and get lost. AND Ignoring their come ons isn't saying NO either.

Girls seem to think that the only guys that exist are the ones they're attracted to, so when the guys they like tend to have bad qualities, they try to equate those qualities to the entire gender.

In reality, guys are much more diverse, but your preferences are much narrower.

So basically, your assumption that there are no good guys basically means that of the guys you like, none of them are good which is your problem.

of course there are good guys, but you girls have your heads up your butt because you want guys that are hot and while you say you care about personality, your just like men, you really don't so you ignore guys like me who are not that good lookin, but have a great heart and will love you better than anyone else. Same goes for guys too, most of them jsut want a hot bod, even I want someone somewhat attractive, so of course there are good guys, but you probably have ignored them, and will continue until your heart gets broken too much.

Dont lose fail in me ( not so much the other guys). This is totally why I don't have many male friends. I prefer relationship to sex anyday. I can't deny that if girls were smarter, and listened to their male friends and fathers about what guys really want, they wouldn't get played so much.

I'll raise my hand on this one.

For guys the first thought that goes through our head is sex.

However, not all guys dwell or make known those thoughts.

Personally, I am a virgin, I have never cheated in any way, and my best friend (a girl) I have only let know about what I thought about her sexually a couple days ago and only because she asked.

Not all guys are sex driven, keep searching.

not all guys are like that because look at me, I'm here. I don't go out with every girl I see, mostly the ones that know me and I am friends with. I would never flirt while I have a girl friend and am abstinent. but you have your oppinion so be careful with who you sorround yourself with. that's my advice

If you continue to go after what you've always gone after, you'll continue to get what you've always gotten.

I love that piece of advice I read from an elderly.

The point is, we are out there. But you have to take risks. Learn to adapt to new situations and spontaneous decisions.

I can't tell whether I have a good heart or not, it's for someone else to decide. But from my experiences girls often ignore a silent guy and they never bother to look into who he is or even talk to him. They won't bother trying to know him better, or try to find out what kind of person he is, or whether he is interested in talking to them. Maybe there was someone out there amongst the crowd who just wished you would come and talk to him and walk with him. I don't know about the other similar guys but I would have never made the first move and I definitely never want to have sex before marriage. I am sure you will find someone like that everywhere but girls never bother to look. All they do is just look for the modern, fashionable and talkative guy. All I have to say from my experiences is to look for the heart... not the appearance.

Why are you putting all the blame on guys? For the act of sex to occur, in the sense you're describing, it takes the effort and consent of BOTH people. Guys flirt and so do girls, it's what people do to make things interesting. But sometimes a sexual innuendo is just an innuendo, we all say them for laughs. For the act of sex to occur YOU would have to escalate the situation just as much as the guy. So YOU are just as much to blame. The question therefore shouldn't be "why can't you find a good guy?" but "why are you such a f***ing hypocritical slut?" Stupid slut.

Yes, there are guys out there but they are the ones you probably don't normally hang out with. I'm picky on girls because where I am it is both ways to the extreme, guys after girls for sex and girls after guys for sex. So I won't even bother with a girl unless I know for a fact she can prove that she is in the relationship to be with me, not just to get laid

I think the real question is "are there any girls out there who appreciate the good guys and actually give them the time of day?"

Stop blaming men for your problems. YOU choose to be with them. They aren't forcing you to do anything. Act like a mature adult who is in control of your life and stop placing the blame on men who want sex. You're in no position to tell a man what he should want or do.

You must be beautyful. cause that's why they want to be with you.

Well, a lot of males think that females want to be with them because of the money or fame.

On the other hand, a lot of females think that males want to be with them because of sex or something else.

it doesn't always have to do with the guys, look for different types of guys and also I'm with someone and we've never slept together and I don't go looking for sex and I'm happy with how things are. look for different guys than you've been looking into

like what most people guys are saying, girl seem to be interest in the bad boy compare to the good guys, there are a lot of good guys out who looking for a long term relationship, and has a guy I must say that don't judge us by a cover, the cover of a book may look great but the story isn't always a good one, but a book that has a cover that doesn't always look the most exciting can be one of the best stories...keep looking there are goo guys out there

good luck, hope you find the right guy

Perhaps your sending out the wrong signals? If you seem to ask for guys who just want a fling then that's what your going to get. Even if you aren't doing it intentionally, it may be true.

Try reviewing your flirting skills or how you approach guys.

Try playing hard-to-get. If a guy continues to chase you then its likely he isn't just interested in sex.

Unfortunately for you girls, us males produce more of the hormones that make us aggressive along with the instincts to continue the human race which makes us want to have sex with as many females as possible. It's all quite primitive. This might sound funny but watch shows on Nat Geo or Discovery channel on primates to get a better idea to our sometimes vulgar behavior.

yea there is. I am. Maybe you are attracting the wrong kind of guy around you. Be more friends with a guy not a girl. your always going to get a few guys that are not what you want. Don't let a guy jerk you around. you deserve a good guy. make him earn it as well as reward when he does. Maybe it is the reason we are called Dogs! lol

Yes. There are a few good guys left. Chivalry is not dead...merely gasping for breath. I'm 21 years old, still waiting for GF#1. There are guys like me who believe it is best to wait for the right girl...and not go breaking hearts and fouling up girls innocence until they find one they like. My advice for finding a guy who wants more than sex? Find one who hasn't had it yet.

2 past girlfriends have cheated on me. not like all out f***ing around, but when they were drunk they would makeout with another guy or something. it doesn't matter what gender they are, it matters how much of a standup individual they are. A man (or woman) is only as good as their word, if they don't have that, they are good for nothing. I've never cheated, and never will.

haha saw someone say that the nerdiest and geekiest dudes can also be the biggest losers. AGREED. don't just fix your eyes on them nerds if you want to find a good guy. go check out the deeply principled guys. sure, some of their principles might be sticks up your nose, but then maybe you have to go check yourself as well.