So men are often like “men are expected to do so much more shit to get a girlfriend! they have to pay for dates, get a good job, etc!“
Even if we disregard the fact that women do need to spend money on dates (makeup, hair, etc - not only do men care more about looks than women do in a longterm mate, but women also have higher beauty standards to live up to, due to makeup and photoshop etc), I wouldn’t actually find it unfair that men have to put more effort into “acquiring a mate.”
Why? Well, “finding a mate” is very often interconnected to reproduction, right? Well, I was just thinking the other day about how annoying it is that it seems that we have to go through so much more effort to reproduce. Pregnancy, childbirth, etc. Then I thought - well, yeah, it does require a man more effort to “acquire a mate” to reproduce with than it does for a woman. So I guess the extra effort that men have to put into “finding a mate” (and thus reproducing) helps to balance out the extra effort that women have to put into reproducing after having already found a mate.
So not only is it totally fair that men have to put more effort into finding a mate, but it would be totally unfair to expect women and men to have to put the same amount of effort into acquiring and keeping a mate, because that would be giving women a double burden & making the effort required to be put into reproduction even more unequal than it already is. (I do still think that women overall put more effort into reproduction than men do, even with the extra effort that men put into actually finding a mate. It really can’t compare to pregnancy and childbirth.)