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Women Seeking Financially Secure Men Are Not Gold Diggers (Page 2)
Anonymous
(25-29) 
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Why is a liberal arts degree useless? What an acrimonious statement. I also don't like that you need "more money to have more fun." When I am done medicine I will make $40,000/month, and the women I will want to date are not girls who needs me to shovel copious amounts of dollars into a date.
A stable man is more likely to commit? BAHHAHAHAHHAHAAHA shittiest thing I've heard all day. Know where al dat stable money went? To bishes and hoes. Goodluck on finding ur rich man. Rich people are know to be selfish and greedy. Even if u end up with a guy who doesn't have a well paid job, at least u can survive with him if u both help out eachother right? Now thats real LUV but if u want sumone who gets paid more than u, than ur most likely a gold digger. Afterall u won't die by marrying sumone with low wages right? at least u can still live to see another day.
See I'm the same way with women. I don't think it makes you a gold digger to want financial security in life. Dating a guy specifically for his wealth would make you a gold digger. I was fortunate enough to grow up in a family that had a stable income but I had plenty of friends who didn't and their families were always at each other's throats. I'm attracted to women who are goal-oriented and have dreams and a career that they want to accomplish. I admire it and I like to surround myself with like-minded people.
I want to be able to have the money to travel with someone I love and have a good time. I'm one of those people that desires that kind of financial freedom. I don't really ever want to settle down in the traditional sense. I would need to be with someone who is like me. I agree that financial security matters.
if you're emotional connection hinges on how much money he has, you're no catch. no offense.
You should also realize-some men want you to want them for THEM not their money... so they hide it until they trust you. Take me, I live in a crappy apartment in a basement... but I have Almost a $1,000,000 in real estate holdings-including the house I live in. It just makes more sense to me to rent out the nicer parts and make more money... and I don't even have a liberal arts degree... I'm an artist. But (and this is the part I don't reveal) I was a real estate broker making 6 figures til 2 years ago, when i quit the show-to be a real person and look for a real person to share myself with. Yes, you are a gold digger and yes, that makes you a dime a dozen... just sayin
And only a dope would put a ring on any finger-marriage is for women and suckers. Nothing in it for men today... (yes, I used to be worth a lot more, I learned my lesson lol)
Very true, I don't see anything gold digger-eske about it. I plan on being financially well off when I have kids so I would expect the same from my husband. A lot of guys get all pissy about girls wanting a certain type of guy or that they can't find a girl, but in all reality, you need to date your equal. I feel like a lot guys think that smoking hot girls are bitches for not wanting to date a 5, but in all reality, she worked hard for that body so it is her choice and same for a guy. Go ahead an attack me, I dont care
It's scary to know there are girls like you out there. But it's good because more girls out there like you that vocalise it the more men become aware. This gold digger thing wasn't a big deal a decade ago but men are wishing up. You say she worked for that body... What does that have to do with money. This isn't prostitution mate
@Fgabexxex To be fair, she's only 17 years old, so she doesn't know any better. Their brains aren't developed fully until they hit their 20's. When I was a teenager, I had ridiculously high standards too.
It's not prostitution but it relates to the issue of men and women dating. What I was saying is a lot of guys think that they should get the most beautiful girl in the world when they themselves are ugly, and then they get all bitter about it and call every woman a bitch or a gold digger. I dont see how wanting my husband to have a well paying job when I raise MYSELF to the same standards of having a well paying job is being a gold digger. Also to the girl who is only 5 years older than me, you're damn right my standards are high. I have been through hell and back in my life and if I want the best for myself there is not problem in that. I guarentee I have taken higher level classes than you have and as far as my maturity, I pay bills, I pay for my own things, I am basically an adult. So dont try to cop out and be a condescending bitch because of my age, because frankly, it has NOTHING to do with it. Both of you can leave me the fuck alone because I have had it up to here with assholes
I have had it up to here with assholes on this site telling me what MY life should be and that MY opinions aren't right. If both of you bother me again, you're both blocked. Im done.
Sensitive little girl
Not sensitive. I'm angry. You don't know true anger until you fuck with an Italian girl. BLOCKED.
Yeah, simply wanting financial security isn't gold digging. Apart from financial problems being a leading cause of divorce, a person's earning potential says something about the character of that person, chiefly his drive, ambition, and intelligence.
My wife had a steady, stable income and I expected that of her. She expected the same of me.
P. S. I have a liberal studies degree. Somehow I made it work. ;)
That's subjective!
If they're at an age range of (18-24), and they go out with older men for money!
Then you're in terms called a golddigger!
Because most men who turned the age of 26 already have their life together, and moved out of the house!
Now these men who are 26 are paying mortgages, and bills!
However the reason why these young women are going for older men!
Because some feel it's easy to get money out of them!
Therefore it is subjective when you make that statement!
Piano and ballet lessons, dont they fall exactly under "worthless liberal arts" lol?
I find it hard to believe a succesful or attractive women has so few contacts and quality suitors in real life that she would have to resort to online dating, because powerful succesful women are out there networking and engaging (i know because i work with such women)
The spirit of your take is fine, but i'm seeing holes in your story.
I have a "worthless liberal arts degree," and I probably earn more than the take writer as a technical writer. I would never commit to a woman who judged me based on my income.
Good point!!! I actually deleted my account after 2 days of being there.
I don't understand why people still shame online daters in the 21st century. You're just perpetuating the misperceptions that people have about people who choose to find someone compatible online. My widowed neighbor found her soulmate last year and they just got married three weeks ago. I actually forced her to get back into the dating world and helped her with creating her profile.
If it was said to solely offended the mytake owner it was a very low blow.
Offend*
@umama In the context of the take, what are the realistic chances you're going to find a high earning, socially forward man, who looks good and is going to be a good stable father sitting arond clicking women on an internet page? Those men are go getters, they are out there working, earning, achieving and they are chasing the women they want.
You just proved my point, why would a man that i have described above be intentionally out looking for people a widowed woman? Answer, he is not, he can cherry pick who he likes.
My intent is not to insult the mytakeowner, i have already said i agree with the sprirt of her take. BUT if you want those standards in a man, you have to uphold those same standards yourself - otherwise you are, for all intents and purposes, a gold-digger. EVEN that is not an entirely bad thing in my eyes, if you have exceptionally good looks you can play the trophy wife and give him a better chance of attractive kids.
Dating websites like eharmony use complex algorithms to match people. So it can be highly effective (not sponsored lmao). by the way my neighbor is in her late 50s and her husband is a successful computer engineer who worked in a high tech manufacturing firm.
Yes, it's very unlikely that an online dating site is crowded with handsome, eligible bachelors. But there are some good men there. I don't think she said liberal arts are worthless. It can be very enlightening but she is correct about liberal arts "degrees" being worthless. Colleges in America are like diploma mills churning out graduates with no employability skills. STEM degrees are the only ones that are worth going to college. I know tons of student loan indebted people who didn't pick their majors wisely and currently unemployed.
Well, the number one cause of divorce is actually women, 80% of them to be precise. As for wanting extra spending money, why not earn it yourself? In a world where women are suppose to be equals (and horribly oppressed) don't you think its strange that your advocating marrying a man for his money? Just earn it yourself. Also if your primary objective is to get a man with money then yes you are a gold digger, you want him for his money everything else is secondary as you yourself just admitted to when you stated that you refused a relationship with a guy purely based upon the fact that he did not have it. Its true women may want this but if its the most important thing then it is gold digging just as if a mans only concern is a woman who is attractive then he is shallow, its really no different. Financial stability is important but if all that matters is his financial stability then that is an issue.
I disagree that money= stability in terms of relationships- In fact I have only ever seen the opposite.
Anyway, I know lots of guys are salty when money comes up in dating. I totally get if that is a quality you want to have in a guy, anyone can have preferences, the problem arises when you won't even give a guy a chance if he has no money- that is shallow. Just like if a guy wants a hot girl, and won't even consider a girl who may be a better match in every other department for him, just because she is not hot. I just don't get why people limit themselves so much before a first date even...
That isn't shallow at all. Its practical. I'm not saying he has to come from a good family background, but at least be striving to position himself to be able to make money. For example, I myself come from a lower middle class background, but I'm studying to become a professional so that I can make money to provide more for my kids than my parents were able to provide for me. Why is it so hard to want a man who is also striving to do the same thing, and is doing that? I've seen too many women date men they had to take care of, and I'm really just not feeling that.
@lokilauren I think we are thinking of different things... What you describe is having good work ethic. I totally agree with that, I myself am a hard worker and could not deal with some lazy. The difference is, wanting someone who is a hard worker means you accept them without the money, so long as they are honestly trying hard to better themselves.
I don't know, I think the way you are phrasing all of this just comes off as shallow, like you only want a man not for him, but for the best provider you can find.. Which you are more than welcome to find and get! But I think most girls would turn around and call a guy shallow for simply wanting the hottest, healthiest girl because she will birth healthier children and pass on better genes. Doesn't sound too great does it? But if I say I want to be sexually attracted to a girl I marry, well It removes your reasoning away form an external purpose, to a direct one.
@lokilauren Over all though, I have the same background and same goals, so I totally get what you mean. And I have dated women who were a bit on the lazy side and that drove me crazy. I need an equal in my partner. but that is it, I need an EQUAL. Not someone who takes care of me more than I take care of them. I know that is not what you are after, but this sure as hell how this take comes off. I think it was just a lot of poor phrasing.
Also I want to add, I don't think money adds as much to stability in marriage as you think. With money, comes more demanding jobs and more time working which is by far more likely to cause cheating, and general dissatisfaction between a couple. Out of all my aunts and uncles and my friends parents growing up, my parents were the poorest. Yet, we and other people on our level all come from loving families, where as I think all but two of my friends parents and one aunt and uncle are still together, the rest divorced.
A lot of divorces happened right after their youngest graduated high school. I think because they were together for their family and kids more than each other. Which it sounds like you are more interested in. Be together for each other first and foremost, and a loving a stable family will follow naturally.
I hate when guys decide that because a woman values financial stability in a man, she only values and looks for that. Gee thanks.
Okay I agree with the second half of your message. I'm looking for an equal as well. We're on the same page.
I love how you talk about "wanting" to do things for somebody else's money.
I'm sorry, but you are a terrific gold digger.
If you don't have the same amount of money and financial stability as I do, you can go fuck right off with whatever requirements you have for me.
Well a lot of guys want to be the breadwinners in the household...
A lot don't, I think you're projecting. *You* want guys who want to be the breadwinner, because it allows you to sit back and do nothing.
@Kirah Well that's boring. I want to spend more quality time with the kids. I plan on having 6 of them.
Men get frustrated with women, because we don't really care about a woman's financial situation that much. All men really care about is two things
1. how she makes us feel
2. how she looks
While women tend to have a lot more criteria. This specific criteria of searching for men with money to spend, is really unfair to young aspiring men. But it's life.
You are right, women aren't gold diggers, this is the way women have always been and always will be. It's natural for a woman to pursue a man with wealth
Best comment I've read so far.
So pink anon has a stem degree and held a good job for longer than a year all while being in her mid-twenties, right?
It's fine to want a man with a decent job. But it's the hypocrisy that's so goddamn annoying: either the woman has to bring a decent job to the table too (and none of that "I only work 3 days a week because I like to enjoy life" BS), or she should just admit she plans to leech off of a man.
Now I ain't saying you are... but they might be :v
https://youtu.be/6vwNcNOTVzY
https://youtu.be/HSVltEYE6V4I'm financially secure... an I'd keep my distance... preferably in another continent... or planet from someone who thought like this. :v
A little too fixated on the money my dear... just a tad bit too much.
With that said...
Also FYI the reason why there are so many divorces in the US is simple... POOR PLANNING; You guys seem to jump into a marriage without spending as much time to get to know your partner, so when the going gets rough... you get going instead of working it out... it's not about money.
Fairly good MyTake... just a tad WAAAAAAAAAY off on the mark there Mam... but A for effort.
I agree with the Catch-22. A Husband working 60 hours a week is not going to be around to be a good husband and Father. The Wife will complain.
If he cuts back his hours in order to be around the Wife and Children more. She will complain.
A "happy medium" has to be found. It might include the Wife working!
Anonymous, you said, "What is the number one reason for divorce? It's money". This is incorrect. Its dissatisfaction of the Wife with the Marriage.
www.psychologytoday.com/.../women-initiate-divorce-much-more-men-heres-why
Financial stability is great, but there are too many girls who expect a man to provide them with things when they don't really bring all that much to the relationship. If you're a girl who has nothing to offer and expects the world in return, then you probably are a gold digger.
Apparently the mytake author wants the man to pay for the dates.
Nice take! good for you..
Now Two questions..
1.) If you had two men in your life who you dated. One was everything you wanted but right now he has less income but will earn more in coming years... And he is dedicated and all...
But the second guy is rich or earns a lot more than the first guy but you are not sexually arched towards him or like him...
Which one would you go for?
2.) Second question is... Do you earn yourself? What gives you right to demand a man who earns more than you when you don't earn equally?
In this world where your all women say that "we are INDEPENDENT AND STRONG and we can ear our own money" then why do you still demand a suger daddy?
I don't understand? You women are really hypocrites..
Is that why you posted this anonymously? Are you genuinely proud of this myTake?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6vwNcNOTVzYI don't want to get pms from weirdos
You know there are ways to make your account private so you don't receive pms from anybody that you don't follow right? That's a crappy excuse lol.
Oh that's great!!!
Yet another pathetic female parasite belittling our sex.
It's at times like this I take sides with the guys.
Right! I guess women aren't capable of making their own money?
@BlackGirl23 Well I don't know about you, for I consider I work jolly hard indeed 5 days a week to earn my money.
But there again I was brought up and taught to understand the value of money.
And if I really wanted something I had to save up and buy it myself.
Absolutely not!
Had this discussion with a friend who was complaining about a chicky wanting to date him for his money and asked what I thought.
Every woman wants security, doesn't mean they will toss his ass later if he hits hard times. All relationships have to start somewhere, if a lady indicates that she likes to be taken care of then more to her. She is being honest with her desires in a mate/lover.