Me and my girlfriend of 4 mo the recently got into a fight and when we made up we got into a deep talks dn I opened up to her and told her about my shady past like how I used to be a player after I got out of my first serious relationship when I dated for a year. Is this a bad thing should I not of told her that? I felt comfortable opening up to her but maybe she'll hold it against me?
- Being too open is badVote A
- Being too open is goodVote B
- NeitherVote C
Most Helpful Girl
As wise as an ol owl that i believe that I am here, dear, you know what the Old saying Says... Let sleeping dogs lie where they flea.
It's Fine in Any New or Old Relationship to have Open lines of Convo. It's very healthy and wise.
However, saying too much isn't always the Golden touch nor is Golden sometimes. With being an Honest John that you seemed to have been, in time, should there be another 'Fight,' she might throw this boner in your own face and you Then... Would have wished you had never gone barking up that tree with thee.
You past is your past so let it go, Joe. What is More Important at this moment in time, is How you are Now... Bury this bone and leave it Alone... From now anyways.
Good luck. xx0
Most Helpful Guy
After 4 months, I think it's definitely time for you to open up and start talking about whatever comes to mind. Not to mention, it's better to get your skeletons out of the closet early.
Also, it shows a sign of trust on your part. You're trusting her with information you felt was private enough to anonymously come on here and question, so I know she'll appreciate your honesty and your trust in her as your companion.
Too often men close themselves off to their lady-friends, which can cause serious issues in the relationship. It's best to make a habit of being open and honest with her now, because she will begin to trust you more and more.
If it causes her to have bad feelings toward you, or feelings of distrust, then it will be your responsibility to prove your worth to her and to show her that you are not that guy anymore - once she sees you are not that guy anymore, the trust factor will increase exponentially.
Never be afraid to open yourself to the one you love and to the one you plan to stay with. Women are wonderfully forgiving creatures that will surprise you every day of your life. They are a lot more understanding than men (in my opinion), and they are able to forgive the ones they love a lot easier.
So good on you, my friend, and good luck. I hope this helps.
I've been married for going on 17 years, by the way - that's my frame of reference.0