Do you think that people GENERALLY date in their "league"?

There are many trolls on this site, but there's one that always keeps coming back and if I point out that he has become boring, he tells me that I'm fat, ugly, and a new one, "lesser woman". 😂
Anyway, I showed my best friend his post and his replies to me and at a moment she said "He still hasn't figured it out that people date in their own league".

P. S.: When I think of "league", I include personality/intelligence and looks too.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • No. Men often due to women's inflated ego date down. Guys who work out regular, and make more money than girls often have to settle for skinny fat girls who make less money on them.

    On the other hand women often date men way above their league but they think they are in the same league because many women today are full of themselves due to social media.

    A 5/10 now thinks she's a 8/10 because her friend and males on social media tell her how hot she is.

    She meets a man who is actual an 8/10 and he may date her for a while but chances he'll actual keep her around long term is most likely not going to happen unless she is something special.

    Summary:
    Women date upward
    Men date downward

    The negative effect of this for women is the creation of the alpha widow
    www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a25414-the-alpha-widow-how-they-come-to-be

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think they usually do, but you'll sometimes see couples who shock you. Usually I don't care. If people like each other, they should be together. What I find annoying is when a guy or girl will ignore people except for just the hot ones, but they aren't that special to begin with and yet they complain that they can't get someone.

    I know someone in real life like that. He isn't ugly, but he isn't hot either, and he also has some extra weight. Overall he is a good guy. He can get along with most people. He is good at charming people if he makes them angry. He also has plenty of women who want him. However, he has extremely high standards. He will only date very beautiful women. A friend of mine likes him, and she tried getting me to set them up. He refused to date her though because she isn't pretty enough, and she apparently has 'thunder thighs.'

    He has never ever had a serious relationship. He spends all his time complaining about how women don't like him, and that nice guys finish last. I've pointed out how many women do want him, and at the beginning of our friendship, I wanted him too. None of us are good enough for him though.

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What Guys Said 21

  • Yeah I think people generally do but leagues aren't determined just by looks. They are determined by your overall value.

    Also I think there's two rating systems:
    1) SMV Sexual Market Value (how desirable you are just for sex).
    2) RMV Relationship Market Value (how desirable you are for serious relationships).

    Some peoples SMV is higher than their RMV while others are the reverse. Some people are high in both categories while others are low in both.

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    • This is why I added the P. S., that I meant both personality/intelligence and attractiveness.
      By the way, interesting input with SMV and RMV. 😊

  • Yeah, people tend to date similar people, but it's because they can.
    Ugly people would want to date gorgeous people, but the chances of the gorgeous one choosing an ugly one is little to none.
    Gorgeous people have more options, and they're obviously going to choose the best person from those.

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  • The golden rule : Relationship can only happen if both people feel like they getting a good deal out of the relationship.

    This "league" thing is just a part of it. But you have to understand the bigger picture. A person can look like chewbacca but if he/she has something else to offer that make the other person THINK they are getting a good deal overall then they WILL date him/her.

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    • Some girls date guys out of fair of being dumped and want to be worship.

      Good looking women may date an ugly/average guy because who physically is below her league due to fear that if she dated a chad he might get bored with her and leave her for another girl wanting to jump his dick.

      In addition the ugly/average guy would treat her like a queen because she's the best he can ever get (i. e. he'll cherish her). While the Chad would consider her another girl he's spending a short relationship period in between all the fucking he's doing.

    • @BubbleBoy69

      Yep. It satisfy the golden rule : Good looking women think they are getting a good deal because they don't have to worry about the ugly guy being unfaithful, while the ugly dude think he's getting a good deal because he get to date a hot chick.

  • What if I haven't identified my league yet? xD
    I mean, I have changed a lot in the last years, principally physically, so I'm many times still clueless about what people think and about which my league is.

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  • Somewhat, although I think of it as "types" rather than leagues? There's certain "types" that most people seem compatible and interested in dating, so you can date people where you're each others' type. Like I may be average looking to people on average if I'm someone's type then I'd be much more attractive to them. I don't really think you can classify things as leagues since people have difference preferences.

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    • Agreed, but more or less people that find each other compatible tend to be in one way or the other similar.
      I don't know if I explained this well, I hope you understand what I'm trying to say. @.@

    • No I agree, for example I'm skinny and most of the people I really clicked with have been too.

    • It's not really intentional or anything it just happens to be like that, but it probably is for the reason you said... we can relate to each other based on similarities

  • Yes. People date similar interests/attraction levels generally, in my opinion

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  • That "rich guy" are you talking about? He called your face fat? Haha i saw thatm Dudes wacko
    Nope I don't think so. I think the older you get the more you realize that.

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  • Not entirely. I often see people of low value and high egos dating others who are out of their league, though the ones out of their league are dumb enough to date them too.

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    • *cough* "generally" in caps lock *cough*
      I haven't seen that phenomenon that much to be honest, but I'm not denying that it might happen quiet often.

    • Just be more discerning, that's all. Things are not always as they seem, especially with people.

  • Lol are you talking about that black guy who was whining why he's still a virgin and how girls don't deserve him?

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  • Of course they do. People try to get the best mate they can, and that is generally a person in their "league".

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  • Yeah they do.

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  • sometimes they do and sometimes they adjust because they have low standards.

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  • Yep
    But not me
    Cause I don't date 😂
    And i won't until an year
    I mean I'll try not to :P

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  • Yeah, studies have been done on this that people tend to gravitate towards people that are considered relatively as attractive as they are. There are exceptions, but generally, yeah.

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  • A "league" is one of many social constructs that I don't accept.

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  • People generally are only attracted to people of similar attractiveness. So, yes.

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  • Sorry but he is a dick+asshole..

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    • I know, but entertaining because of that. 😂
      But the question is about "leagues".

  • seems to make sense.

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  • Most people date someone similar to themselves so yes.

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  • Most people do, yes. Honestly I think the imbalance in a relationship makes a relationship less reliable to many. Feeds insecurities and what not. Some people might enjoy or feel it worth it but most won't.

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What Girls Said 5

  • I date out of my league

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  • I try too
    above would make me feel intimidated
    above would make me feel I have the upper hand
    I prefer to have the upper hand and him being intimidated by me

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  • I don't really believe in leagues, but I do often see girls who I like the aesthetic of with guys I don't like the aesthetic of and it confuses me. But I chalk it up to my perceptions not being universal, because they're not.

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  • Yes.
    I generally date people who understand and reflect what I am and where I hope to be.

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  • I date in my league i look for top laners.

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