Can guys really go a long time without girlfriends?

and/or sex?(this is kind of more towards guys over 21) is it true that they can hold out for months or possibly a year?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Certainly. For years. For several reasons.

    Men are less social and some men simply have lower libidos and don't understand why all of their more social minded buddies chase girls 24/7. This applies to geeks as well as they are more inclined to be working on a prototype or debugging code instead of dealing with women who require so much of our focus and attention. And you must admit that women require attention.

    And not to be crude but when in need of release our right hand never whines about dinner first.

    Good luck

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What Guys Said 24

  • Yes, definitely. I can speak from experience (unfortunately). I've gone 30+ years. Hopefully it won't reach the limit of a certain popular movie out there but we shall see.

    Why? There's several reasons. I'm shy, not good with girls (and yes, I like girls.a lot), girls I am around are "taken," and I'm not good in social situations. I could go into more detail but I do not think why is the focus of your question. You're probably wondering.

    How? Focus. Where a guy has his focus in life. Concentrating a lot on work or school can keep one from finding time to be with someone. They may be able to make time, though not always the case, but they may not want a girlfriend (or uhm, sex) "interfering" with work or school. Some also may want to have a good foundation in their lives before they start committing to someone; IE a steady job, a good home, car, whatever. Some may want to really know a girl first before they start getting intimate and such. That can take awhile.

    Or, sometimes what I'll say, somewhat jokingly, is "Oh, I just like to keep the money I earn!" ;P But there's obviously more to it than that as money shouldn't (at least in my in my opinion) be the sole focus in a persons life.

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    • I'm tempted to say that if you exerted as much focus in your daily calorie intake and diet you wouldn't be fat, and could actually see your penis and/maybe get laid. But that would be too rude.

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    • So, not the Momma... you mean to say that several of the posters here AREN'T actually unicorns that bug steal the organs of other unicorns?

      Wow. Good to know. I guess some apologies are in order. ;) Ha ha.

    • Hehe. :P I mean, in this thread alone, if going just by the picture, we have Bob Rooney (myself), James Bond, a T800, and a chess queen dispensing expert advice on the interplay between the sexes!

  • I was single for 6 years between girlfriends. And since I'm a virgin, yeah.

    Why?

    While I've got a choice somewhat as to what and whom I give it to, (and I'm waiting for marriage) celibacy is still pretty much forced on me. I'm ugly, busy, and make next to nothing. Until one or more of those things change, I'm going to bet you I will be single for some time; and I will not be getting all that sexual when I DO find someone; well, not for at least till I'm married to them.

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  • yes. it's true.

    once I went a year without sex, and also, I went a year without dating. so it's possible.

    but it's onl possible if your a "happening, fun, sorta guy".

    I loved my spare time,

    I involved myself with sports, hang outs, movies and everything fun.

    there's always time for girls and there's always time for sex, but how often to you get to do the things that you really want to do and enjoy?

    Enjoy your singleness and lonelyness, and have a rocking time.

    sex is great though

    and dating and being with someone is awesome too

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  • Let me tell you my experience. I went forever without a girlfriend, till my 21st birthday two weeks before I met this girl. We dated twice, then she laid me down and took my virginity on my 21st b-day... But I never climaxed. we dated for 3 months and she wouldn't work with me to climax... I found she was cheating and seeing other men as well.

    I've gone now without a woman in my life for 6 years. and it SUUUUUUCCCKKKSSS. but nothing is better than getting into another abusive relationship where I was giving all I could to it only to have the woman break your heart and toss it away.

    I've always wanted to know if life was ever worth living alone without a girl. I decided no it would be meaningless living just for yourself leaves you feeling selfish lonely and without reason.

    I'm currently in the looking for status... I've had 5 attempts go wrong (let's be friends) or (nah I'm busy) yea rejection is kind of my thing I think. Not that it's a bad thing, you learn from it. But I guess it's just hard for guys to open up to girls and be accepted. If you don't have the good looks, and if you're not a charmer. What the hell can you do? Hope to be a lucky S.O.B. and just meet someone who's willing to look beyond that.

    I know none of this helps, but it's all I have to offer in advice. I've ruined many a night feeling sorry for myself, making up reasons why, going over all the facts... It's life man, so try your best and if it doesn't work out don't dwell on it.

    But here's where I start my personal complaints... Never F*****G tell a lonely person don't worry it'll happen when you least expect it. Well no S**T they've not been expecting it for a long time now, so stop giving them reasons to give up!

    The right one will find you... NO THEY WON'T less you go looking you will just be a stone left unturned by anyone who's looking.

    At least you've got us your *insert w/e you want here (Friends, Parents, Relatives, Co workers ect...) At the end of the day you're not going to be in their bed hugging and kissing them or having sexual intercourse with them. So yea thanks a lot for reminding them that you exist. That's not their damn problem.

    Online dating maybe an option: Sure if you want trolls, people ignoring you, or want to waste your money.

    Try Singles Nights or Speed Dating... Old ladies, desperation, people who have no interested in you if you don't look attractive. They're not there to talk all night, they want to see some good looking prince... Common misconceptions are made when they do that. Admit it you've all wanted to see a decent guy/girl suddenly and hope it works. Hell I would pay $$$ Just for them to bump into me at this point...

    and Never NEVER NEVER! Pay for it, never go to the strip clubs to at least see what you're missing ect... that's money wasted. you'll look pathetic... and yuck germs stds ect...

    Well that's it, all I have to say. So good luck to all of you!

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  • Easily. I went for about 5 years without a girlfriend or anything like that 'cause I was too busy with my job. I needed to spend what little free time I had by myself to decompress after work. I would've made a terrible boyfriend at the time if I'd tried anyway, but I found it was more relaxing to just take myself off the market for a while. It didn't bother me that much at the time.

    Some of my coworkers whined frequently about not having time to get laid, though. To each his own, I guess.

    By the way, I have a couple of female friends that are not interested in dating. One is just as busy as I was, and the other had a bad divorce and has come to learn to be content living single. So, it's not like the idea should be totally alien to the female mind, if you'll excuse my teasing at the wide-eyed nature of your question. :-)

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    • Totally that's my issue just busy with other things constently and I don't simply have time for a female. That and the Divorce thing hit home with me, went through a horrible one, and totally agree with that girl, that maybe I'm better off just being single I know "Exactly" and can feel where she is coming from on that one, lost a "TON" of trust in women after that.

  • For guys, they should take the 1 month challenge. Heard about it back in highschool, it's basically like 30 days 30 nights the movie. No sex or masturbation/foreplay for a month and somehow it should improve your life, make you see things in a different view. I did this back in highschool for about 6 months, when I started to masturbate again it felt like my penis was being tortured and going to be ripped off but it got better over time. So taking the challenge for 1 month then having a release is probably a healthier choice.

    I've tried to do it again but only lasted 2 weeks before I gave in to temptation, might try it again right now after reading this question. Just gonna have to have my cup of ice water close by.

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  • well even though its for people over 21 I am just going to throw this in here I have been in college for going on 3 years now and will be 21 in 2 weeks, I am yet to have sex or even a real relationship with a girl, I do try to create one just doesn't work out so at least from my many failed attemtps I still keep going, sex I hear is supposed to be like an addictive exctasy however I always wanted more then sexual pleasure, so that is how I learned to coupe.

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  • Before exploding, dieing, or what? One can certainly endure not having sex, but I can't think why anyone would want too.

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  • Sure we can go a long time without a girlfriend but sex no, I haven't had a girlfriend in couple years and the last time I had sex was a few days ago. I probably get laid more often than most of my friends do that have girl friends. Plus I am very particular about the girl that I would want to date, now when it comes to sleeping with a girl yeah I don't really care. It's not like I am going to see them again.

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    • Seriously? that seems so backwards... I wouldn't want to do it with just anyone.

      I hope the girls you do it with aren't expecting anything more than sex, otherwise that really sucks for them...

    • Some of them tell me straight up we are going to have sex no strings attached, so I say ok, and others yeah they might like me but why get into a relationship that you know is going to fail?

    • That's fine I guess if you clarify there are no strings attached... But with other girls you should let them know your intentions, otherwise they'd just think you're a jerk.

  • Well... here is living, breathing proof. I had a bad breakup in 2003 when I was 23. Right around the time my Mom got seriously ill and required surgery and a months stay in the ICU... My Girlfriend was mad early on she was not front and center which temporarily distracted me from focusing on the seriousness of the issue. I swore off women for the indeterminate future. After one Year I revisited the notion and was good with pushing the no Girlfriend practice out 5 years... Now it is 2013. I am fulfilled, own several houses (detroit property is cheap) and have both of my folks, nieces and nephews, cousins brother and sister that have a great connection with. Some chick being all prissy when Your mom is in ICU can skew your opinion but yes... it is possible to go a long time without a relationship and be just fine. Then You begin to not want a relationship... Nice girls will on occasion flirt and ya politely tell them Thank You but Unless You want just another guy friend I am not what Your are looking for and really hope You find a great guy.

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  • Oh ya, I'd say so, I haven't had one in over 2 yrs.

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  • Yep. long time no girlfriend for me. I've had sex, but no girlfriend. Sex is rare though.

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    • 2mo

      Im 30 years old and never had a girlfriend beyond 5 months and hardly ever get sex from women. So im ready to give up on women

  • They can if they set their mind to it.

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  • im 20 years old. never had a girlfriend nor have done nething sexually with a girl... lol and I have no problem wiht that either... besides I'm happy being single. life is just more stress free and I have better things to do with my time such as making my career. and if the right girl with my expectations comes along id take the chance other wise I can't be bothered by women they are a pain in the butt.

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  • My room mate went through a traumatic relationship with his fiance at age 21. He went 2 years until hooking up with another girl.

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  • Current situation: 5 days without sex, results are hilarious. I'm getting spontanious erections and having great dreams, I might stop masturbation entirely because the effects are so fun.

    P.S I'm on a vacation.

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    • Wow, seriously? How often do you have sex or masturbate or whatever when you're not on vacation??

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    • When I was at home I was having sex daily, multiple times. Before the relationship fapping was daily. I'm currently in morocco smoking some honestly grown hasicsh with my homeboys.

    • The hash might have a little to do with spontaneous boners and great dreams

  • I'm 22 and I've been without a girlfriend for about 6 months now, still a virgin too!

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  • Ever heard of monks?

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    • Hahahaha

      That's a good one! :P

    • Just because a guy doesn't feel the need to jump everything that moves doesn't mean he's a monk, maybe he feels there are more important things in life than just "Sex" or "women" in general. Granted not saying they are utterly useless just saying. Often times, they aren't the first thing on my mind. Most likely the last. That and once one of them screw's you over royally you tend to "Steer" clear for a good portion of time for due reason.

    • You're funny!

  • Yeah , more than one year .

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  • Possibly a year?

    Possibly?

    HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

    HA!

    Lightweights...

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  • I'm 22, been single since May.I went 6 months without getting sex but then found a casual girl. It was great at first but the novelty is wearing off and I want a girlfriend.

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  • I am 21 and I have never had a girlfriend or sex! I AM AWWWWWESOME. jk I hate myself.!

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    • Dont hate yourself! that is cool you haven't given into that stuff

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    • ...is that as cool as having the rarest pokemon? lol

    • Naw bro...

      shes lying, women don't want a guy they have to teach, it'll be tedious and they'll lose interest in the guy. don't hate yourself, just start talking to women. I'm not exactly Rico Suave, but trust the more you talk, you'll adapt and get better.

  • Sure. I've done it before. Heck I'm doing it right now, it's easy.

    Besides I don't want a girlfriend, I want wife material. That would be worth *all* the trouble.

    p.s. when I say wife material please don't assume I'm talking about some mythical pretty virgin girl, I mean a girl with whom I have a deep level of understanding and similar values and characteristics.

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  • well I'm 22 almost 23. I haven't had a girlfriend in 5 years? give or take. and I've been on dates. even had a girl wanting to have sex with me after a bar and said no. you can call me whatever. I'm still a virgin. I'm just waiting for something a bit more special than a one nighter. might just be because of how I was raised. coming from single mother/grand mother. about 90% of my friends had sex already. but I'm just there.

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    • And there is nothing wrong with that, your sticking up for your values and beleifs nothing wrong with that at all, can't say I'm the same way. But I guess I can understand if these are your values you would naturally feel this way and very "Strong" about them. But this doesn't make your friends horrible people either, they just have different opinions and values which is all so common in life, not everybody is going to look at it in the same light.

What Girls Said 5

  • I sure hope so! My husband is deployed for a year and we don't get R&R til almost 10 months in! :) He did wait for me for 10 months before though. I was a virgin and wasn't ready so he waited until I was. Guys can wait. They just choose not to.

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    • Thats good! and really sweet, ya the guy I like is in the military and I won't see him for about 6 months!..so I'm kind of wondering if he will wait for me and [hopefully!] not have sex or anything..but guys tend to have a bad rep for waiting.. =/

  • I asked my boyfriend if he could ever be with someone if the other person had no intention of ever having sex (this question popped up on a dating website) and he said he could. I gave him a strange look because I know how guys get when it comes to sex, and he claims that he could live without it. But I still am having a hard time believing it. But he swears that as long as he has his hand, he'll be okay. And my boyfriend is 24.

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  • Well, girlfriends, yes. Sex? HELL NO! LOL! Guys can't go one day without thinkin about sex. Let a lone go without it longer than a month. they go crazy. They need it. It is in there nature.

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  • Thank you for asking this question. God bless you.

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  • Hell yeah. maybe they just do it themselves when they want sex or get it somewhere else.

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    • Very true comment. If you wanted it to be susbtaitiated. Sometimes we may just go to a different girl/women. Especially when the one of ours is neglecting us. Although, with me it's honestly because I don't feel desired by women/females. I don't exactly have them flirting so I kinda just gave up on em at somepoint too, and decided screw em. I'll do my own thing's have fun and still smile. I'm not about to let women drag me down. That and I had one screw me over ever since haven't trusted.

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