Do most guys choose looks over personality and why or not?

id like to know because I have both good looks and personality but some of my friends don't!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • In short: If you want a simple and straightforward answer? Mostly yes, at least at first. Why? Genetic traits are easier to 'see' then personalities.

    In full: In many guys, but particularly in us younger guys (18-24), looks play a big role in the initial attraction to a girl. That's simple genetics unfortunatly.. Guys are programmed to look first: for the girl who displays 'more desirable' genetic qualities, and second: for the girl who displays the best social attributes for a potential mate (and by extension, potential mother of their children). HOWEVER, genetics is not everything, and every guy is different. Although many guys will tend to flock to the most beautiful women first (and to a lesser but still prominent extent, many girls will tend to flock to the most handsome men first)... once they get past the initial 'physical attraction' stage, they usually move into the 'personality attraction' stage. This is when looks usually becomeless of an issue for both guys and girls, and the other person's personality really becomes an important part of the attraction. If you think about it this way, you can understand why many partnerships of shallow, but good looking people tend to break up fairly quickly, and then make the same mistake over and over again, because they just go for the most good looking people, who are not always (but sometimes are) the most desirable personalities. The trouble is, too many guys (and girls) at a young age tend to just go off their natural instincts and place looks as a number one priority. This creates a self-fuelling shallow outlook for the most beautiful people of either gender who tend to take advantage of their own good looks to pick out and go for the best looking members of the opposite sex.

    When you reach a certain age however (or perhaps more accurately, you accrue a certain number of different relationship experiences), people seem to get wiser about it all, or their genetic pre-disposition becomes less prominent. So you tend to find that each successive age bracket will be less focussed on looks and more on personality then the last.

    In the end though, people are far more then just the sum of their genetic parts, and you will find people of all ages, sexual orientations, and genders having vastly varying amounts of focus on a person's looks and personality. In the end, it is the sum of our experiences that shape us the most into the kind of people we are, and by extension, whether we choose looks over personality ;)

    As you can see, there is no easy answer to such a question, particularly the explanation =P. I think its most important though not to judge all guys into two categories "likes looks" vs "likes personalities"... and remember that there is infinite and varying possibilities lying between these two choices.

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What Guys Said 5

  • Hello,

    her looks will make me ask for her number.. after that its all down to personality..

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  • Lucky girl to have both. :D

    To answer your question.. Men are VERY visual. Looks are often the first thing a guy will notice. Although some will judge more on personality. I try to split the difference.

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  • i judge more on compatibility in life goals and morals.

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  • I'm much more concerned with personality than I am with looks. That being said, if girls aren't showing interest in me, then when I ask a girl out I have nothing to base my decision on except for looks. Unfortunately, this leads to me liking a lot of my good friends, which never works out.

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  • I did. Met a girl I thought was cute. She had beautiful eyes. But what really got her was her personality. She was humble, sweet, kinda shy. Was faithful to her friends and religion. I asked her to date, took her virginity, and we dated for nearly 3 years. Over that time she got physically gorgeous. Like lost a little weight, started trying at her appearance with make up and smaller clothing. She started getting attention from other more attractive guys and left me because she felt she deserved someone better looking. So me, from the beginning had the right intentions and just got thrown aside in the end for it. I loved her like no other.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Looks are the first thing men and women notice about each other.Guys will choose a beautiful,sexy,girls who is b*tchy,rude,mean,ungrateful and spoiled over an average or "ugly" girl who is nice,sweet,humble,funny,kind and giving.

    Looks are basically all that matter to guys.Of course,we aren't supposed to judge them because they are visual.

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