Do girls wear chokers to symbolize they're subs?

Question

It seems as though the choker, specifically the black lace ones, have become more and more popular. I see women wear them all the time. However, in regular Dom/sub play chokers are used on the sub. It's well known that a lot (not all obviously) of women like to subs, and the women who wear chokers most often look like they're not new to anything sexual. So are these girls wearing chokers in public to let everyone know they're a sub? Or is it to show they like sex? Or am I overanalyzing a simple thing?

ClarissaMeow · Accepted Answer

*Correlation isn't equal to causation.*
The rule of thumb when you're generalizing is that unless absolutely 100% of the mentioned people follow this stereotype, then you probably shouldn't generalize, unless you should suffer the wrath of obnoxious SJWs..

Just in case you want one, the "black lace choker" is called a tattoo choker and it's made of cheap plastic almost always. For sub purposes, I think most like the pink leather collar with a metal heart on it, because that literally IS a symbol of being a sub. <3 lol

Truth is, lots of girls of all ages, like myself, fell in love with the way our chokers/plaid skirts/fishnets looked and felt to wear back in the 90s. It's not ONLY for nostalgia :p

Nobody actually thinks it will automatically make you a slut or something like that. As far as I can tell, it's just how us ladies compete.

I'm not sure why people don't say it more often, but ironically "chokers" feel pretty comfortable, maybe I'm the only girl who enjoys them? I don't know :(

Anyway, the way it sort of hugs your neck, so that you're hyper aware, and stay hyper aware of it being just shy of a perfect fit. I like the tingle to your neck that feels so elegant.

TBH, if you're a girl you've probably worn one before, and either know or have no clue what I am talking about.

If you're a guy, then I think you should buy one. It might sound weird, but I'm serious. I'm not really interested in men, but it looks pretty damn good on both. You should try it our for at least a week. c: Ask a sister or a mom if you're too chicken, or borrow it from a girl who doesn't mind you stretching her jewelry out!
IMHO the dainty piece genuinely looks better on guys, when they only have light stubble or a clean shave.

My S. O and I like to be naughty in public in ways people don't notice. For example, she likes to remind me to put my tattoo choker as a "collar", "Otherwise, someone might not know who I belong to." type of petplay/ownership. Or when we go out to dinner we like to play games with some hidden remote control vibrators.

So, is it possible they're wearing it as a symbol? Hell yeah, but do most of them? Nope.

Wizbit · Accepted Answer

Sadly most women (especially girls) wear them as a fashion accessory because they're a popular look. Particularly the very fashionable lacey ones. Ironically a lot of the girls wearing them for this reason think it makes them look more dominant. I actually found a site selling collars with stud writing including "slut" and " master"! Kind of missing the point there.

I'll admit to being a collar wearer, however I'm not a true sub. I am submissive to my boyfriend but not the true master/slave dichotomy. I wear a collar because he likes it and it feels good; especially when he pulls me around by it. I also think it looks good.

A true sub wouldn't be seen in the kind of collars you're talking about. Their collars are symbolic of a deep commitment and have meaning of their own. They have a collar for showing they are sub, a collar for declaring a regular master and a true commitment collar when they dedicate themselves fully to one master - an equivalent of a wedding ring. These collars are sturdy and practical and will often have padlocks, particularly the commitment collars.

Minxxie · Accepted Answer

It's just an old 1990's trend that is coming back, just like plaid skirts, fuzzy sweaters, crop tops, and chunky platform shoes. If it was to show they were submissive it would be an actual collar lol It scares me that guys overanalyze what women wear so much a girl could be wearing something she thinks is completely innocuous and is just something she thinks looks nice and a guy could be thinking "OH THAT GIRL'S BRACELET MEANS SHE LIKES ANAL!!! WOW!" I mean come on...

Girl_Scout · Accepted Answer

You're reading too much into it. Simple as that. It's just jewellery. Submissive women wear all sorts of different things to make them feel... owned. Yes, many wear chokers but it's more often some kind of collar.

Rawrzz · Accepted Answer

I don't think so. I love chokers. But I am not dominant. I'm not submissive, either. I refuse to label myself either one. But, I know I hate submissive women. I also hate dominant women. A middle ground of partnership on equal footing is best. I love chokers. And I would have picked up on it--I believe--if they were a means to subconsciously express submission.

If this were true, then you would have to use the same reasoning for necklaces, no? Or somewhat tighter necklaces. Saying it's like "a dog collar" or some shit.

Now. Do women wear red, purple, or pink lipstick most often as a means to express how their vaginas have good bloodflow, something like how males wear huge ass penis-ties which go down to/point to their penis? I think so. If you see a woman wearing red lipstick, she's on the prowl. Almost for sure. And if she's wearing purple lipstick, she is sexually promiscuous. Most often. I believe, based on no evidence and a vague memory of a social study.

God those black lace chokers are fucking hot. No idea why. But I've always loved them. But I don't believe that they are a means to express submission... I don't think so. I guess it's possible. But at the same time, you have to take into account human thought. It's difficult to distinguish conscious thought from subconscious thought in a circumstance like this, I believe.

Facepalm · Accepted Answer

They wear chokers cause they dont know where it originated from.  They are the equivalent of a girl with a "Nirvana" t-shirt who doesn't know who Kurt Cobain is.

Anonymous · Answer

I'm a switch, I like and do both Dom and sub. But when I wear a choker because I don't like wearing long necklaces. They can get caught, snagged, whatever and I don't like having that feeling there, so I wear something not tight but it sits higher around my neck, and not dangle.

I don't know if that made sense... I have issues with things hanging, including earrings, which is why I wear studs. So, I voted for the last option, although there might be some women that are doing what you say but not all.

ElizabethBiersack · Answer

Well I've never had sex, so nope. Also I don't wear lace ones. I wear these ones 👆🏻

Betwyn · Answer

it may have used to mean that...

but, fashion has taken it and mostly destroyed an inherent meaning it might have had.

it now means whatever the wearer wants it to mean.

be that, I'm a sub.. I'm a sex freak, or look at me.. I want attention!

fjh80 · Answer

You're reading too much into it.
I think that more often than not, girls wear chokers because they like them.

I'm sure there are many who wear them because they might be submissive, but I would thinkg that they're the minority.

Personally, I think chokers are sexy.

Nuro15 · Answer

I have girlfriend who wears a choker sometimes. She is quite dominant when she has around herself people who cannot take lead. She just likes things her way. When she is with me, she is quite submissive.

Does the choker represents her submissivity? Frankly, I don't know. I think, it looks good and she does not wear it all the time.

I assume girls wear it consciously bcs they like it and maybe slightly bcs unconsciously it fits their slightly submissive nature (?) I mean, have you ever seen a dominant girl wearing it? I did not. (This is just my assumption, for the real reason, we would have to do an academic study)

Okayo · Answer

This is absaloutley disgusting. I am 12 and i wear chokers and this is very offensive and confusing to me. My classmate went up to me and said that black laced chokers are for sluts and i was like what? And so i went home after school and looked this up. I am disgusted. Its like racism, if a peostitute wears chokers then everyone else who has them or wears them is a slut. How is a material supposed to define you? Chokers are cute as fuck and if you would want to show that you like y know what , you would write it on your tshirt or dress. People like you are horrible beings, HORRIBLE. Not every girl is related to stuff like this when they wear the same clothing! I already had a bad day and to realise that this is a thing that everyone knows just showed me the way down so far that you could reach hell.

seanf610 · Answer

Sex is a two way street. And they probly do it just to catch ur eye because it's stylish and well what message do you put out by brushing ur teeth for ex. I want white teeth and its healthy people like it women like it it's sexually attractive when I go out everyones gonna see me bro lol.. We always put out messages with actions and things we just have to become more aware of them. When we do we see that a choke collar is just a cute fashion accessory and there's no conspiracy u have to worry about so meet someone and worry about finding something dark out and getting tied up and smacked lol cuz u can tell if a girl is just adorable it will be there on display. For example a girl who wears a choke and maybe some make-up thats dark and u get the point

NearlyNapping · Answer

Chokers can be used in other ways. but mostly it's just fashion. Like most fashions they come and go over time. This is the second time in my life that chokers came into fashion, and at least once more that I know of in my parents time. The last time I remember them being in fashion was (I think) in the 70s. Coincidentally that's also the last time straight cut bangs over the eyebrows was in fashion. So there are at least two fashions from the 70s currently in style.

Anonymous · Answer

Chokers didn't originate with S&M and have been in and out of fashion for centuries.

maria96 · Answer

Nope, not at all.  It's seen as super fashionable and that 90's kid soft grunge shit.  Sub chokers are different anyways

Anonymous · Answer

Most things that girls do have nothing to do with guys or sex. Guys seem to think everything has to do with them... it doesn't.

dominiquois · Answer

Chokers are worn because they look pretty. You assume that everything a girl does is related to sex. STOP. Most things we do are not.

Bobba_Fett · Answer

Collars are for subs. Chokers are for anyone with a long beautiful necks.

FakeName123 · Answer

Consciously? Not necessarily. But I do think on an instincitive, subconscious level they choose them for that reason.

Lilverawang · Answer

My dom doesn't make me wear one. Its a hard limit for me

GigiTheGuilbert · Answer

I wear chokers like that every day 😂 I don't know I like how they look.

Bea123 · Answer

no, it doesn't mean anything tons of girls wear chokers cuz theyre cool and unique

ConsultantIsBack · Answer

They were popular way back when i was in middle school. They came and went away too fast i think, i like them!

Kylesar · Answer

My girlfriend wants me to get her a choker because she's into that DDLG stuff, but for the most part, you're over-analyzing it

Anonymous · Answer

It's simply just another form of jewellery and some girls look much better wearing them

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