I like my co-worker, but does he like me too?

There is a guy that works with me at my job, and I had no interest in him at all before. But since I began working with him more often, I started to see what a cool guy he is. I especially started liking him when I found out how much we had in common.

So, the first time I realized he might be interested with me was when we were at work and he came up to me and gave me the warmest most sincere hug, both of his arms were wrapped around me, and it wasn't just a quick hug, it was more than a few seconds long (my other coworker looked at me after he walked away and she looked at me like, "I think he likes you" kind of look. He's done this more than once. When I greet my other male coworkers it'll be a quick hug, nothing like the ones I get from my crush.

But then I sometimes see him hugging other girls, but I'm not sure if its the same way. Then sometimes I can see him looking at me from the corner of my eye or sometimes he'll walk up to me and play fight with me. And sometimes he just smiles at me. He always asks me how I'm doing, or he checks up on me for no reason. And then there was this one time when I was off and was about to leave, I quickly said bye and he called me back so I could give him a hug.

OR sometimes he'll poke me or kinda massage my shoulders.

Its starting to get confusing because there are somedays where he doesn't do the same things.

I feel like he is waiting for me to be more flirtatious with him, because I kinda try to hide the way I feel because I don't want to look like an idiot if he doesn't like me too. I don't want my other coworkers noticing that I like him and then it becomes a huge thing.

I am the worst at flirting, I'm too scared to do it! But I really want to get to know this guy, he seems really cool. But I feel like if likes me wouldn't he have done something about it already?

Also forgot to mention that now we don't work with each other as often...i see him maybe like once a week or every other week...i kind of like it that way because it keeps everything kind of fresh...

So my question now is, should I do anything different I'm my approach, should I act more flirtatious or keep cool and drop hints here and there?



Most Helpful Guy

  • Bottom line, he likes you.

    Now, here's the problem. He may like you but not do anything about it, because you two work together. That may be why he seems kinda off some days.


    He likes, you, he doesn't care that you two work together, but you aren't really letting him know how you feel.

    So, you need to let him know you kinda like him too. I don't really know how close you guys are but maybe mention something to him about hanging out outside of work. Give him your number or ask for his.


What Guys Said 20

  • I think you should keep things cool and dro phints here and there. I think eventually he should make a move on you. But he might be scared to take a risk. But the chemistry is there.

  • Maybe he might be scared to make a move on you, He could also be sending you mixed sigals. That is true if he is not feeling you then then you get played. He might also be afraid to to take his flirting to a whole new level. He could also be just friendly but I feel if he likes you then he should have dones something abiout it already.

  • " But I really want to get to know this guy, he seems really cool."

    Tell him that. Say: "You seem really cool. I really want to get to you. Wanna hang out this week?"

  • Be brave and mighty forces will come to your aid. OK, forget the mighty forces thing. Just be brave and be flirtatious with him.

  • He obviously gvs a sign he s some kinda interested in u,letting him also knw about your crush on him z nt a bad idea at all..

  • u should joke around with him and hint that he should take you out. or that you should take him out. see what his answer is. I'm surprised you haven't done what all girls do and check out his MySpace or whatever to see how many girlfriends he has. LOL. I mean it sounds like he likes you but then again he could just be one of those guys who's comfortable with girls. and flirts with all girls he gets to know. does he seem like the player type?

    • Haha I commented in the wrong box, my answer for your question is aboveyour comment...

  • Yeah, I believe so. Go get it! #:-)

  • Just ask him out.

  • Not to rain in on the parade but I feel itchy about saying that he likes you. He may just feel attracted to you and just wants to have fun flirting cause he is at work and what else can he do while he is working. I sometimes do that to the girls I meet. I will flirt with them (cause they are girls...) but not really takes thing seriously.

    However the way to differentiate between flirting and whether he likes you is if he acts that way only in front of you. If he acts like that only in front of you then he definitely has something for you.

    If you are not afraid of repercussions (as in he stops acting flirty with you altogether and may not talk to you after), I'd suggest my "stupid" plan. I would confront him and say "why do you keep acting this way? some of the other co-workers are beginning to think that you" either "like me" or " that we are dating" ( If I were you I would choose the 'we are dating'). At this point carefully judge the expression on his face (you may ask a close coworker to secretly look too for a second opinion). If he shows remorse, dissapointmet or anything emotional you know that it felt something to him and chances are that he likes you (unless he is an extremely nice and sensitive guy). if he laughs or jokes it out, without the slightest show of emotion then its bad news =/. CAUTION: Some very skilled guys are good at not showing any emotion so it can potentially be misleading. Also, some guys are overly sensitive and show emotion regardless and that too is misleading.

    Either way once you have done so either he will feel pressured to ask you out now cause he will realize he has been very obvious with his feelings and you certainly noticed it and well at-least you two have now talked about it and it should take things forward.

    The other possibility is he will stop acting the way he was and what you can do at maybe a two or three days later is say that you were sorry and that he is welcome to hug you again. Or you can slowly and etiquettley reveal to him that you secretly like him and it was her way of finding out and yeah.

    • I made an error in the last sentence of my post. The 'her' should be a 'your'.

    • Thank you for that answer, I was thinking the same thing...haha it would be so much easier not to like him...

      I've never really done the whole boyfriend thing before, or even approaching a guy that I like...i become so extremely shy in front of any guy I like and it's hard for me to let them see who I really am.. I will give what you said a shot...ill try your "stupid" plan haha

  • Here is the first thing,up front and to the point.Everything in this world,in this life has reason.There is nothing done without reason.When you go back to work surprise him by doing the same thing,one big long hug,that will knock his socks off,trust me he will be going nuts for the rest of the day.After the hugs get ok,don't be afraid to smile at him first and make first approach.You can't know until you try,i certainly know how you feel with all the not wanting to look like an idot but not doing something you want to do could be the biggest mistake you will make.

    Goodluck,I hope this helps.

    • Thanks! I am gonna give that a try...i like your answer thanks a lot!

  • You make sure that That boy thinks the same way. l experience same things You do, there was one diffrerence She has a boyfriend in end , I learned her liking me closing her deeply , there are many signs that show loving both of you each other.

    you are right about living a love at job , therefore You try it out of job.

    • No, he's a really sweet guy, he seems like a genuine guy...the only problem is that I don't see him enough, I don't work with him as often, but I kinda like that because when he does see me he pays more attention to me...

  • Ask him out. Then you'll have your answer and you can stop obsessing.

    Takes 2 seconds and this drama is all over

    • That's an awesome way of putting it, thanks!

  • massages your shoulders?are you serious? what are doing heavy lifting? plus that's not flirting its considered sexual harrasment--hes actually feeling you up and looking to get some action by putting on the "nice guy" act- don't buy it

  • If you like him allot, then he likes you. Trust me. People like people who like them. Normally they are the same inside as outside too.

  • are you hot

  • Don't be scared. If he is making physical contact, then he's either a pervert (doubt it) or he sincerely has feelings for you. Rather than waiting for him to ask you out, how about you ask him if he would like to go out for a cup of coffee or something and get to know him better. Better yet, you could ask him if he likes you.

    Honestly, if he doesn't, it's better you know sooner than later so it's easier to move on.

  • Joke around with him, I can definitely see the hugging as a sign he may be interested in you. All in good fun when you're play fighting tell him because of that he owes you a date/dinner/etc. and see how he reacts to that, or even give him a little flirtatious wink the next time you catch him looking at you. He seems interested from what I read, good luck!

    • Thanks, those are some good suggestions...will mos def try that!

  • This guy is my God.

    But in your point of view, find the end soon; don't get involved in any confused relation. When guys are young, we don’t play with girls feelings (manly because, we see you as chocolate or flower or something like that), but some girls play with us in younger days. We learn quickly (some by 16 and some by 25), from next girl we start doing all these play stuff.

    Playing with any once feeling is wrong. It can hurt a lot (if at the end, all that is just for fun).

    ya, ask him out and try to know if you are wasting time.

  • If you want him, you've got him. Next time he gives you a little shoulder rub, put your hand on his. 3 seconds tops. Anything more is not denyable. Gives you room for a gracious getaway should things go awry.


What Girls Said 4

  • He really likes you, but maybe not for something serious. It could be weird because you guys work together, but you should try to get to know him better.

    Flirting isn't that big of a deal - if you like him, then just be nice to him, which I'm sure you are. Saying something cute every once in a while or giving him quick compliments will show him you like him and notice him, but without being so obvious that you have a crush on him.

    If he knows you like him and he really likes you too, then maybe he will pursue it more.

    Maybe you could arrange a hangout session with a bunch of friends from work? If a group of you went out and he was there, you would get a real chance to get to know him and hang out with him, but it wouldn't be weird because it's not a 'date'.

  • I would suggest hanging out outside of work, say there's a movie you're both interested in, you can be like, "We should go see that! You have my number, right?" Then let him take the initiative to make it happen. If you try this a couple times and he doesn't take the bait, forget about it, but it's not awkward because it's not like you asked him out or anything, you just wanted someone to hang out with, no big deal, right?

  • why don't you causally ask him out to lunch?

  • Well he may like you but since you two work together it may just be too awkward for anything further to come of it. I am not a big fan of flirting at work myself and I don't want to get into a situation with a guy that later bombs and then I am stuck at work with him. So, for me, when I was younger and would even consider dating a co-worker, if he wasn't making it real clear he liked me and asked me for a date, nothing would come of it. Like I said, I don't want to deal with some guy who kind of likes me, it doesn't work out and then I am stuck seeing him everyday. Too awkward.