What are my chances with this girl? Is she mocking me?

[Anonymous]

So last weekend I met this girl at a bar in a weird way and we gave each other our number. So I did text her the next day as she asked me to do.

This is what happened so far:

-She spotted me looking at her and she came over to me and shouting how cute I am and she also gave me a kiss on the lips :). (She was a little bit tipsy)

-Next day (day1) I messaged her she remembered who I was and after texting each other for a while that day, she told me she was working at some event and she invited me to attend the event if I’m not busy - didn't go because I was busy and I suggest to meet the following weekend

-The next day (day 2) after we met she told me that she was searching me on face book.

- Until the time of writing this post she always returned my messages however I always initiated the messages, she never did so far. :s

So what are my chances with her? Is she mocking me ? Although I was a little bit embarrassed how we met (hehehe) I think I like her.

All input and thoughts accepted

Updates

+1 y

update 1a

-she did chat most of the time


-she tried to guess what aftershave I had on and she liked it


-she commented that I (me) love to be cuddled, and replied that I’m the only fair person in the family.

Updates

+1 y

update 1b


-Held her from the hips but she did not remove my hands nor react (if she reacted I did not pick up the reaction)


- She talked about this event and I sort of offered to go with her (I think I screwed myself)

Updates

+1 y

update 1c

-she said not to rush at one point

-she said she loves being single


However yesterday afternoon I messaged her and she didn't reply yet! How to proceed now? did I loose her? what did I do wrong?

[crhowe0525]

Well she's definitely flirting with you but some of the things you said like how she mentioned she loves being single make it seem like she's not looking for anything serious right now. At this point I think it'd be best to try to get closer to her as a friend. Give her a few days and then maybe ask her if she wants to do something with you. Not necessarily a date but just hang out. Get to know her and confide in her a little bit. Basically try to become more than the average friend.

I can't promise this will turn her into your girlfriend overnight but it will sort of ease you into her life. If you guys can develop a friendship that isn't going to fade away quickly, you have a better chance at a relationship with her. Even so, keep in mind she has already said she likes being single. I doubt she'd say that if she didn't mean it and although peoples wants and needs change over time, it could be a while before she wants to be serious with someone. I'm not saying that because I think you have no chance, I'm saying that because I don't want you to count on something that could really end up going either way.

Most importantly, don't force it if things just don't seem to be looking up. And remember everything happens for a reason, at least I think. Good luck and let me know how it goes!

[Asker]

So should I attempt in messaging her again today ?

[crhowe0525]

No, I'd give it a few days. I hate to advocate game playing but after all, she "loves" being single and isn't going to respond well to a guy she thinks she can instantly "have." Wait until like Thursday and don't make a big deal out of wanting to hang out. Just strike up a convo so you're getting responses from her and ask "hey wanna come to ___ with me this weekend?"

[Asker]

In case she reply, I continue messaging her as usual or "ignore" for a few days? what would you suggest?

[crhowe0525]

If she replies go ahead and answer her back but once the conversation seems to be over, don't try to keep it going. Just leave it at that. Basically don't seem overeager for her attention.

[Asker]

Thanks for your replies. she did message yesterday evening, however then she mentioned some thing she was watching and asked her what is it all about and she didn't reply yet :s So no chasing from for the time beinging

[Asker]

*i.e. I'm not going to message her for now as you recommended.

[Asker]

The girl didn't message me yet since monday. and I didn't message her again since monday. What's the best thing to do now ?

[crhowe0525]

Go ahead and message her but keep it casual. If you get to talking a bit and you're comfortable then go ahead and ask her to hang out.

[crhowe0525]

I think she likes you and she's letting you do the initiating for now. Why? Probably because she does't want to come off as clingy or stalker-ish. There's typically a double standard here where if a girl texts the guy then she's (like I said) perceived as stalker-ish but if the guy texts the girl then he likes her and its cool. I'd just continue getting to know her and see where things take you. I definitely think you have a chance though and no I don't think she's mocking you.

[Asker]

So what do you think I should do? ask her for a casual date (my idea was to go for a drink than maybe hit the clubs) ? or should I tell her that I'm gonna be at the bar (where we met) then message her if she's around while I'm at the bar? what are your thoughts?

[crhowe0525]

I would say something like "hey too bad we didn't get to hang out at that event you had. How bout I make it up to you and we hang out this weekend?" At this point she's already asked you to hang out so I think you'd be fine asking her on a casual date like that. Both scenarios you mentioned would be fine too. From the sounds of it, you've got a pretty good chance she'll say yes.

[Asker]

Thanks for the support :). I give it a shoot and take your advice :)

[crhowe0525]

Good luck! :)

[Asker]

We did meet this weekend, at the bar where we met initially however it was short. We met for about 15mins just before she met her friends. However yesterday I message her and she didn't reply :( yet and I was wondering if you could give me some insite about what I just wrote in the update section :)