Nope, not pathetic in the slightest. I'll admit that whenever I hear that someone cries or has cried themselves to sleep I always feel pained myself that that person has experienced sadness or pain to the extent that it would compel an individual to such an intense release of despair in what is a fairly isolated fashion. So no, I wouldn't think it was pathetic or "weak" at all. We're all human, despite gender, race, etc. we all ultimately consist of the same matter and go through the same processes as anyone else, although perhaps experienced differently. Crying is normal, and albeit is quite sad to hear about someone who cries themselves to sleep, it's by no means abnormal or odd, at least from my perspective anyways.
There's no shame in the act though, we all have our bad days here and there. But if it occurs on a fairly consistent basis for you then I'd encourage you to talk to someone, whether it be a close friend, or parent, or counselor of sorts; I think many people would be amazed at what a listening and compassionate individual can do for a person and their emotions. Or at least find some way to help relieve some of the emotional stress that you experience during those times. Admittedly, a few individuals can function fairly normally while keeping things inside of them without engaging in an outlet of sorts to release it, they are a very, very small percentage. In the case of most individuals, bottling these things up or internalizing them acts as a moderate - or often times - huge detriment to their ability to function in a healthy manner and go about their lives in a positive and effective fashion, but it also often impedes their ability to cope with future events and stressers down the line, which then intertwines into numerous after-effects including such things as possible health issues, etc. It's just not a good thing all around really.
But anyone that judges you for it isn't worth your time; people like that tend to either lack a sense of developed maturity or not be educated enough in the matters of the normal processes of human emotions and subsequently the coping and outlet strategies that are used to deal with said emotions. Crying yourself to sleep on a regular basis isn't something that any individual should have to endure, and/or crying yourself to sleep occasionally here and there - while painful - is okay and happens to a lot of individuals actually. But the important thing to recognize and accept is that doesn't take away from who you are as a person or your masculinity at all. In any way, shape, or form.
I wouldn't find it pathetic, but I do feel that crying that often is unnecessary and can be helped with a little (or a lot of) self acceptance. You really can't be that bad... when I see guys cry, I just want to hug them and rock them until they feel better. I want them to feel loved. :'( The very things you dislike about yourself may be the very things that attract others to you. I have always been self conscious about my eyes, since they sort of aim different ways, but I have been complimented on my eyes so much it astounds me.
I used to do that a lot when I had a much crappier life, I don't think it's pathetic at all. I always felt better in the morning. You've got have some sort of release, and crying is certainly better than getting angry and violent, like some people do.
If it was my boyfriend, it'd be distressing because I get so upset when he cries, but all I'd want is to help somehow.
Just curious, do you have any hobbies you use as an outlet? Sports, art, writing, music, etc.?
It is pathetic. Not in any cruel, judgmental way, and it's certainly not pathetic like flies fighting over dog sh*t is pathetic, but it is pathetic. I mean, you analyse what that means... The ditionary defines Pathetic as 'arousing pity, esp. through vulnerability or sadness' and 'miserably inadequate'.
It is something that deserves pity. It's a very lonely and depraved thing, to seclude yourself from everyone and deal with your misery in such a brittle way, that's really an unsettling thing to think about. Especially if he won't admit to it, and nobody knows about it. No ones there for him, nothing can ameliorate him or quell him, nothing can soften his pain. That's pathetic.
And, miserably inadequate, while that really applies to 'pathetic attempts' at things or whatever, it really is miserably inadequate itself. It's something that's malfunctional; it doesn't help, not in that situation, everything just stirs up boils, the imagination conjurs up all kinds of demons haunting the poor guy; guilt, shame, etc., considering he won't admit to it. When crying usually helps, here it furthers the harm. That *won't do*, will it? That's not enough to accomplish anything.
So, it is pathetic. And we all think that word, pathetic, is such a terrible thing, and it is, it's a terrible thing to be, to be deserving of such pity. But when I say that, I'm not being mean, and there's nothing wrong with it. I do it maybe as much as you...
It's not pathetic to cry, it is however pathetic if a man or woman doesn't even try to do something about it. It happens to me sometimes, maybe once or twice every half-a-year. But in the end it has always been caused by something really tough that was happening to me at the time. If this is happening to you on a regular basis every week for no reason at all then I think it's more important that you worry about yourself and deal with what's causing this, rather than worry about what others may think about it.
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We all have our moments of depression for one or the other reason... Just remember that things are actually NEVER as bad as they seems to be..Theres ALWAYS a door that leads you to a better place.. I do honestly belive that "good things fall apart so that better things will fall together." So "Don't cry when the sun is gone, because the tears won't let you see the stars." :-) Cheer up, chin up! Smile to the world, and I promise that it will smile right back at you = ) = )
I don't blame him. I cry myself to sleep some nights. It's not like I don't try to make those things better, it's just that not everything is within our control. Sometimes a little crying now and then is all you can do.
I don't mind, I personally think it's a good thing. Crying is such a release (it's definitely better than getting drunk!) In fact I think it's so good that would probably spoon you while you cried.
What do you think about a girl that would spoon a guy that cried himself to sleep?
People who cry are actually healthier in a way than those who don't.(Look it up,a study was conducted)HOWEVER,if this is a very frequent thing,you may want to seek help because you may have issues with depression which may snowball into something else.
I would definitely not laugh at him or make him feel worst.
we're all human
it's societal paradigms that prevent guys from fully expressing their sadness or their emotions.
have you tried counselling? my friend is a guy and he has gone to counselling, it really does help if you find a good one.
It's fine I do it too sometimes when I'm really depressed. The last time I cried was when one of my Venturer Leaders passed away. So if anyone reading this does don't worry about it because you are definitely not alone.
do you know why you're crying? like are you crying about something in particular because you're sad about it or you just feel so sad all the time that at the end of the day you need to cry?
He's got some serious issues and he needs to seek therapy.
I think he should straighten out those issues before he gets married or gets into a seriosu relationship. I don't know about other girls, but it might get a little annoying.
i think it's sad and that you have problems. just like everyone else
How often is sometimes?
Damn, that's f***ing sad.
*hugs* its ok
He needs help.
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