Do you think it's unfair that women are ridiculed for their preferences in the opposite sex?

Question

- Women like taller men, men like shorter women.
- Women like men that make more money, men like women that make less money.
- Women like men that are strong and muscular, men like women that are weak and soft.
- Women like men that are dominant, men like women that are submissive.

It seems unfair to judge women, when men biologically have preferences that are opposite to women's. The only differences are that men's preferences, by nature, are easier to attain, and men might be more lenient in their preferences due to the fact that their life might be better if they dated someone who... makes more money, for example, despite the fact that they don't genuinely prefer it.

HorrorFan · Accepted Answer

"- Women like taller men, men like shorter women."

Women certainly almost unanimously want taller men. For the most part, men really don't care about a woman's height. We mostly just react and work around the sheer importance of this 'preference' from women. I'm 6'3" and I don't care if a girl is 5 foot or 6 foot. There aren't many women taller than me that don't play for the WNBA.

"- Women like men that make more money, men like women that make less money."

Yeah, hypergamy is definitely a think for women. History bares that out. The thing is, some men might feel emasculated by a higher earning women, but for the most part we simply don't care. Men will date women who have zero income. It generally doesn't matter. Women that make more simply avoid men that make less for the most part so we adjust to that.

"- Women like men that are strong and muscular, men like women that are weak and soft."

I don't fully agree with either side of this one. I know tons of women that are not attracted to muscle at all. In fact, quite the opposite. They would prefer rail thing or slightly chubby. I wouldn't say men prefer weak. Soft maybe in the sense that men generally don't want masculine women.

"- Women like men that are dominant, men like women that are submissive."

This one might be the closest to being mostly true, although I'm attracted to aggression and a more dominant side in women. Which I'm sure is at least a small part in why I'm perpetually single.

So the conclusion here is that both genders don't necessarily have the opposite preferences. Women have a more strict set of preferences (biologically, females are supposed to choose their mates carefully) and men simply do their best to adjust to these preferences. After all, they are almost always in the position of having to do the impressing.

You could easily make a more accurate preference statement by saying "Most men want thinner girls with long hair that aren't crazy and avoid drama as much as possible." and even this obviously wouldn't encompass all male preference. Two of these three are within a woman's control and insane people shouldn't be in relationships, period.

'Easier to attain' for ALL the female preferences makes ridicule more than valid. Where is the balance? If we're going to have this type of discussion then one can't just shrug their shoulders and not expect women to look in the mirror, here.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

"- Women like taller men, men like shorter women.
- Women like men that make more money, men like women that make less money.
- Women like men that are strong and muscular, men like women that are weak and soft.
- Women like men that are dominant, men like women that are submissive."

Mostly everything written here is not true.

Men don't care about height. Some guys actually prefer tall girls.
Men have very little care if a woman makes more money than him.
Men like soft to the touch but definitely not weak and flimsy.

strangytie · Accepted Answer

I think both genders are tormented for having a "type". Women are seen as too picky, men are seen as too critical. When a woman says "I want to date a guy who is maybe six feet tall, always works out, makes good money, etc.", she is seen as having an unrealistic standard for men. Men have the same issue. "I want a girl who isn't so whiny, is fit and attractive, and isn't too girly or too manly" is seen as misogynistic nowadays because he is trying to "control" the appearance and behaviour of the women he wants to date. The money thing isn't entirely true, but some men do see their partner making more than them emasculating simply because our society has taught for a long time, and very much so in the 1950's, that men are to do the work and get money, while women are supposed to work in the home. We've mostly changed, but you'll still find men and women who revert to this idea. I think both men and women are judged for their preferences.

lizziepooh03 · Accepted Answer

Your statement about women's preferences is accurate but your statement about men's preferences is completely inaccurate, I believe.

I also do think men get ridiculed more for their preferences than women ever are.

Like you said, "men's preferences, by nature, are easier to attain..." So if this is true, which I believe it is and you obviously do too since you wrote it, men are fairer in their preferences than women so it is women that should be ridiculed more for their preferences.

As an example - physical preferences:

Women prefer men that are tall.
Men prefer women that aren't fat.

Men can't control their height but women can control their weight so the men are being more fair in their preference than women are being in theirs.

Just saying...

natured · Accepted Answer

I never thought of this honestly because I don't believe in this, because people choose whatever they heart wants to... these things should not be considered, not from a man and neither from a woman.
My man earns less money than me, and he is totally fine with it and so Im I because I don't care, he loves me truly and so do i
He is not the tallest person, he is just a little taller than me but he is good packaged if you know what I mean ;) :P
YES he does have muscles, but so DO I i'm not weak and he loves it LOL
And we are both either dominant or submisive depends on the situation...

So... that's why I don't believe in this because I live exactly the opposite of all of the above ;)

Anonymous · Answer

The problem is that women often shame men for our preferences, and call us shallow, while pretending like women are above that sort of thing themselves. Or women don't understand why men look for certain traits.

Women like taller men, men like shorter women.
Women say men like shorter women, because we are insecure, and need a weaker woman, in order to feel like we can compete against her.

- Women like men that make more money, men like women that make less money.
This one is not true. Men with money don't care how much money a woman has, because he already has his own money. Poor men do like women with money, but women with money see poor men as being below her level, so she doesn't see those men as an option. As such men learn to seek his level of wealth in a woman, or lower, because seeking a richer woman tends to lead to failure.

- Women like men that are strong and muscular, men like women that are weak and soft.
Again men are mocked for being insecure, and not being able to handle a strong woman.

- Women like men that are dominant, men like women that are submissive.
Once again men are mocked for being insecure, and not being able to emotionally handle a strong woman.

There is also the added frustration that men are taught to believe that women don't want dominate men, and instead he is being taught to act submissively, as women claim all they really want is a "nice guy". This deception is very frustrating for guys trying to learn how to attract women. Pretty much any dominate action a guy makes, gets him labeled an asshole, or bad boy in our society.

Remember we live in a post feminist world, where the idea of men and women liking different traits is supposedly sexist, and boys have those thoughts drilled into our heads, by our feminist mothers, and feminist teachers, and feminist media.

This is leaving men clueless on what women really like, and as a result feel upset from being lied to about women, and these guys also see these as being double standards. After all guys are shamed for not liking fat women, which women can help, and that women don't care about looks, only to reject short guys, and height isn't even something men can do anything about. That is very frustrating for guys that are taught to be ashamed of their own preferences.

UnknownXYZ · Answer

Maybe. The question of this being "unfair" is how willing men and women are willing to budge on their preferences. From my experience, time and time again, men are more willing to budge on their preferences than women but why is that? You argue the point that "men's preferences, by nature, are easier to attain". This where I don't agree. Let's take a hard look at traits genetically obtained vs societal things obtained. Things like height, strength, and dominance are strongly determined by what we inherit from our parents. This means that some are more disadvantaged than others. From what you wrote, the only strongest changable traits for a man is his the money he makes and dominance to some degree. The reason I don't include strength because height gives up the preconceived idea of strength. Dominance is a weird one because behaviour traits can be learned but how well someone learns also ties in with what they naturally are like. Looking at a man's criteria for woman, genetic traits are not nearly as strongly tied to the criteria. I would say wide hips and all that stuff is desirable but nearly that strong. Skinny (with pretty faces) women such are put on a pedestal and are worshipped by men. Height is seen as good genes and naturally a shorter man will give shorter height in woman. If men truly do prefer shorter women, then this actually goes in her favour. Now, given this disparity, it's going to be more likely the case men are going to "settle" (we are remain consistent with the notion that men generally prefer shorter women) for really short women. The problem with this is that really short women will as fit tall men's criteria as opposed for short men to girls in general. Men have less options here. With societal traits, men have to actively obtain these things by putting in effort whereas a woman doesn't need do jackshit (or less effort) for the desirable trait. Whether or not it is "easier" for a man, if you are honestly telling me that a man having to put in a lot of effort is as easy as a woman putting in mimimal effort for money, then that logically doesn't make sense and is just wrong. And since it is wrong, again, it is harder for a man to be attractive through this trait. Men will have it harder to obtain this attractive trait.

GraveTruth · Answer

What a bunch of horsecrap

- Women like taller men, men like shorter women.
No, Women have hieght requirements and it's usually tagged with a number. If a guy had a waist size requirement he's be considered a sick twisted jerk. Men like taller women.
Men PREFER women who are shorter because if a woman is taller she
"gets bored" or "the spark goes" in the relationship.

- Women like men that make more money, men like women that make less money.
NO, women require men to earn more. Men PREFER women who earn less because if they earn more than they just "get bored" or "the spark goes" in the relationship.

- Women like men that are strong and muscular, men like women that are weak and soft.
No, women require men to show less emotion and be dominant. If women pick a guy who is sensitive, loyal, and nice then they just "get bored" or "the spark goes" in the relationship.

- Women like men that are dominant, men like women that are submissive.
Yep, that is true. that's true with gays too. 99.9% of the time. For the men who are submissive, they prefer women who are dominant (wear the pants in the home).
Women are not ridiculed for that. They are ridiculed for dating the loudest most obnoxious idiot while ignoring the nicest dude then whining about how all guys are cheaters and pricks.

Anonymous · Answer

"Men's preferences, by nature, are easier to attain, and men might be more lenient in their preferences..."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! So, you're seriously saying that it's EASIER as a man to be 6' tall or more, taller than 5/6ths of men on the planet, and that it's HARDER as a woman to be shorter than the average man? That it's EASIER as a man to make enough to support an entire family and then some, slaving every day of his life to build a high-earning career, and that it's HARDER as a woman to make NOTHING, never lifting a finger or working a single day in her life while living solely off of males' benefit payments? That it's EASIER as a man to be strong and muscular, working out every single day to attain the physique of a professional athlete, and that it's HARDER as a woman to be weak and soft, lazing around, stuffing her face and having literally no fitness at all? That's it's EASIER as a man to be dominant, constantly having to actively fight and struggle to prove one's dominance over everyone else, while it's HARDER as a woman to be submissive, lying back and being completely passive? Are you for real? You entitled princess syndrome little bitch...

Iraqveteran666 · Answer

Considering women get butthurt about guys preferences when they can't match them. Women get especially bitter about guys preferences when the get into their thirties and are still single having spent their prime attractive years 16-30 on the cock riding carousel they still expect guys their age to be interested in dating and maybe one day marrying and having kids with them after years of rejecting those guys because they didn’t match up to their preferences but those guys are now in their prime 30-45 and will date younger.
Men have their own preferences.
1 Must be pretty
2 Must not be fat
3 Boobs and ass size depends on preference
4 height depends on preference
5 must be aged 16-29
6 must be able to cook
7 must be able to clean
8 must be able to sow and knitting
9 must be able to do laundry
10 must have good credit
11 must not be broken
12 must be a hard worker/not lazy
13 must not drink too much
14 must not be a feminist
15 must be a virgin or at least have low numbers.

TripleAce · Answer

Huge differences and Ill explain why

The things women want --> everything you listed may sound like opposites but they aren't

1. Shorter/average height is more common, for men and women. Women don't just like taller men, they like above average height men
2. Making less money is easy and does not require much, making money however does require a lot of effort
3. Women are usually soft and dainty by default men have to work hard to have a nice body (the equivalent here would be any man because most men are stronger than women but that's not what she wants, she wants tall and strong... which takes work.. and needs good genetics --> small portion of men)

alphadoggystyle · Answer

You have to realize, that since it is easier for women by nature to attain the features that are attractive to men, it is essentially easier to be an attractive woman compared to being an attractive man. this is the main reason why sluts are shamed since it is easy for a woman to be a slut, while men are called studs for sleeping around, since it is much more difficult to be a stud.

The main reason women are ridiculed for these preferences is because while you want someone better than yourself based on instinct, you still pretend that the genders are equal. But most men realize that the reason women like these traits in men is because men are naturally superior to women. Nature made women like these traits because you are less capable and more biologically limited to gain these traits yourself, so you are more dependent on men compared to the opposite.

Stop pretending to be equal to men and men will stop putting you down for being hypergamous.

cjmart · Answer

Men are shredded everyday for their preferences! How is this even a question... If I like slim women I'm a fat shamer and am told fat is beautiful and I'm wrong... If I preference a ethnicity I'm racist, a religion or lack of I'm bigoted, or anything else. All that 3rd wave feminists have done is put feminism back a decade or more; mark all men as misogynistic, and create new inequalities and issues for women.
Today women can rank and rate as much or little as they choose, the only issue being that the men they're after are so turned off women and relationships they're either not available or are the arseholes the left has told them they should be

JCT666 · Answer

Uhh... Guys get slaughtered for having preferences too, while it seems girls are often being excused and defended for their preferences. Just say that you don't want to date a fat girl and all the young ladies will throw an emotional hissy fit towards you.
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ALPHALONEWOLF · Answer

when people become
needy greedy wicked selfish...
they think like this. and think and wanting good for ourselves is not bad.

but actually people are blind..
it's become a trend. to do so.
they do even when they know they do not need it.

girl like rich men tall and strong men.
this is something which i think inherited or they got it from society they live. and men
like women you mentioned.

maybe in old days and old. times it's required. And important.
world. is chaning and developing but people thinking are still same.
but still people are not developed...

SomeGuy37 · Answer

Why do you care what these people (mostly guys, I think) are saying, or thinking about YOUR LIFE? YOU CHOOSE YOUR LIFE, and nobody chooses it for you, unless you let them.
I don't mean this, IN ANY WAY, to be offensive, but if you want to be treated as EQUAL, then you have to decide, and choose for yourself, and not ask questions like this, because YOU know what you want, and you are going to fight for that, and tell them to FCK OFF, if they don't like it!!
I REALLY NEED a confident, EQUAL woman, that trusts that what she likes, wants and feels is just as OK as what I like!!

Pyrofox · Answer

Its more that they make such fictitious demands of what they are looking for that are like 1 in a million occurrences. I think that women get harassed because the chances of them finding the "one" are so slim and also a lot of the time. They are not even looking in the right place to find the type of guy they are after. As in they look for the next guy in the same place they met their ex. Expecting a guy who is probably going to have similar ideals to be different. (By no means am I saying all guys are the same. But your not helping your chances by going back to the same place over and over and having bad relationships might be linked to where one is looking.)

Also lots of women seem to make their choices on what the requirements are with little thought of what the guy is looking for.

godfatherfan · Answer

I voted no because I don't think women are ridiculed at all. Not sure where you have come up with that statement. It is the first time I have ever heard it.
I also think you make seriously flawed assumptions.
1) I have never known any man that wanted his wife to make less then him.
2) I have only known a few guys that want their women submissive. I, along with many, would love for a woman to be aggressive like we are "supposed" to be.
3) I wouldn't say men want "weak" women. One of the best things about women is how soft they are. But that doesn't mean they are weak.

Chilled_Eyes · Answer

I think people all have their own wants and that's fine people shouldn't be demonized for that. I think on average it is easier to fit into the catergories that guys like stereotypically guys like say the stereotypical yoga girl or just be born slender and that's a lot easier than being 6'0 talk, abs, massive biceps and money. Guys have to put in years of work at the gym with a vigorous diet along with genetic endowments like height and being successful professionally women have to go on walks skip the occasional junk food and wear decent clothes once in a while.

abc3643 · Answer

The way you've written that list it's as if it's a commandment from God. Nothing can be further from the truth. The spectrum of likes and dislikes runs an entire gamut. If it didn't, then evolution would have bread out all the undesirable traits by now. However we have this vast diversity of humans because we have a vast diversity of desires in a partner.

Maik567 · Answer

I think those preferences are wayy too generalized. For example height doesn't matter to me at all and I've not once heard a guy say "She makes too much money".

Honestly if someone does have ridiculous and shallow preferences then why wouldn't they be ridiculed for them? If a guy said she will only date girls who are richer than him he would get ridiculed, so why wouldn't the same be true for women?

Blitzkrieger · Answer

What you think are male preferences are wrong... Thats not true. I dont care about her money i want a strong woman and i dont care about height either, just like many other men.

Womens preferences are often unrealistic because they are often influenced by romantic movies and stories and also disney movies and other childrens movies. Thats why women get shit for it.

MysteriousDarkness · Answer

Your statements are true and untrue at the same time.
There are men and women who are attracted to people who are shorter than they are, same height as they are or taller than they are.
There are women who do not care if someone makes less than them as long as they keep trying to better themselves. There are guys who do not feel like less of a man if they make less money than someone else. With that said there are men and women who do not care if the other person makes lees money than them, same amour of money as them or more money as them.
There are men and women who are attracted to someone who is strong and muscular and those that aren't.
Nonsexually men are overall more dominate than submissive and women are more submissive than dominate. Sexually men can be dominate, submissive or both. Women can be dominate, submissive or both.

Bananaman177 · Answer

I don't like any of the things you say "men like."

Girl's height? Don't care.
Girl's socio-economic status? Don't care.
Weak and soft? Huge turn-off.
Submissive? Huge turn-off.

So that's why I would make fun of you. Why don't you actually ASK A MAN what men like sometime instead of reading everything you know about us in fucking women's magazines written by man-hating lesbians? It's all crap.

TwinFace · Answer

Men doesn't like shorter women and doesn't rule them out from the rest lel silly girls. It just means that they would most likely prefer women their height and under but some like taller women with their sexy long legs too so get your facts straight. Women in general are most superficial and have unrealistic standards compare to men an when y'all get cheated on that 6ft giant, y'all blame all men for it and not that one guy cuz he know he can get laid anywhere. So im happy that y'all deserve what y'all asked for 👏🏼

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