My ex came crawling back. What should I do?

[Anonymous]

About I month ago, I was dumped by my girlfriend by some loser (Literally. A drug addict- crack head loser). I was starting to lose hope that my ex was really gone and that she was never coming back. I've been no contact ever since she dumped me


However, about an hour ago as I was getting in to bed, I got a text from her saying, and I quote,

"I really need you (my name). You're the only person who listens to me and cares about me when I need it.
I fucking loved you, and I fucking lost it. I understand if you hate my guts. And you don't even have to respond to me."


I still love her, but I'm worried that I'll have trust issues if we get back together. What should I do?

[coachTanthony]

Trust issues would be the least of your worries... The biggest worry is that you are now that guy who doesn't have the value for himself to know this is a bad move. You say you love her... Ask yourself these questions: 1. What value does she bring into my life? Is she loyal and does she have my back? Am I taking her back because I am insecure and have low value for myself? These questions if you answer them honestly will give you the answer you need. She said it herself... You are the only person who listens and cares when she needs it? So because she now needs that back you should just give it to her? What about what you need man.

[awesomeadam18]

I think you should meet up with her take her for a coffee or some food and talk to her like ask questions and see how it goes with just meeting up I have had it before with exs but it turned out worse so I think u should meet up with her but it sounds like she has realised what she is missing about you.

[Asker]

Well, what should I do if I tried to reconcile, and she replied back with "I was sad and tired. Ignore what I said." And then ignores my texts?

[awesomeadam18]

hmmm either that or she is playing games id go with your instincts

[XRabbitHeartX]

Well don't jump to conclusions. A lot still has to happen IF you ever get back together. It's not a good idea to jump back into things with a ex either. So decide if it's something you'd *possibly* want to pursue and if the answer is yes, respond with something neutral and maybe ask her if she wants to meet up for coffee. If deep down you know it will never truly be the same then rather just not respond and leave it in the past. Better to be single or with someone new then to constantly be with someone who you cannot trust and who has fucked you over once before already.

[Asker]

Well, what should I do if I tried to reconcile, and she replied back with "I was sad and tired. Ignore what I said." And then ignores my texts?

[XRabbitHeartX]

Then you move on. She's bad news and isn't serious about reconciling. Still has no idea what she wants. Let that comfort you in knowing it's the right thing to let her go. If she wanted you back she would have said so. You can do better :)

[btbc92]

oh heck no she's conning your butt already man leave her alone. why did you not block and delete her number? Are you seriously going to fall for that trick? that's the kind of line that a lot of cheaters use on weak-minded people. no offense but you really are easy to manipulate based on your description. she doesn't really love you she loves to use you. stop giving your heart to want another so undeserving of you. because as long as you continue to keep on doing that you always be second best. in fact not even close is more like leftovers. that is how offensive it is.

[Asker]

Maybe you're right. I've been thinking about all this stuff. I've come to realize I have pretty low self value and self esteem. I'm just used to constant rejection from girls. This one finally noticed me, so maybe that's why I'm holding on so tightly.

[btbc92]

she knows what she can get out of you. that is why she noticed you. it's the same with jerks when it comes to girls. they find a naive young girl, often a virgin, hoping to give her what I like to call " the boyfriend treatment". Trick her into having sex with him even when its not expected or wanted and give her the lines of " But if you loved me..." nonsense to guilt trip her. And then of course she does often and then when things goes sour he leaves with her virginity. No matter how long they were together. She loss and he got what he wanted. And it's not just girls who sadly becoming victimd of this, its some guys as well. And that is why you need to know your own self worth. You deserve better. You don't need her.

[xxmamichulaxx]

Wait she dumped you for a crack head loser or she got some crack head to dump you for her?
None the less , an ex who realize what they lost after dumping you always comes crawling back like she did , in the same way that she did. You may love her , but what was her reasoning for dumping you in the first place?

[Asker]

She felt like she didn't deserve me and that I was too good for her.

[Asker]

And, I just noticed that typo. I meant that she dumped me for a crackhead loser.

[xxmamichulaxx]

Okay. She didn't end things because she felt like she didn't deserve you and she was too good for you. That's a BS excuse many use to soften the blow of the breakup. She left you for some gross bummy dude , he left her then or broke things off or used her , she's hurt , and now that she has nobody she's crawling back to you. dont take her back, if you do reply, dont give her the comfort and babying that she's looking for. You may love her but if she's only coming back to say how much she loves you AFTER this guy left her or things didn't work out , she doesn't actually love you.

[Asker]

I think they're actually still together. I know who the guy is, and he just posted some stuff about her and how happy he is with her.

[Asker]

Still, he's a loser none the less. I don't even know why I have him as a friend on Facebook.

[xxmamichulaxx]

If you're petty, screenshot her message and send it to him in a message and post it on his Facebook wall 😊😊😊. That might start drama , I shouldn't reccomend it , but people like your ex dont deserve second chances. They most likely got into a fight and she wants to leave but doesn't want to be single , so she figures if you reply and are all sweet back , that she can leave this guy and go back to you. its pathetic

[TheUsername27]

Send him the screenshot... don't post it on facebook.

[xxmamichulaxx]

@TheUsername27 I agree, posting it might be a few much but the guy definitely deserves to know what his girlfriend is up to, even if he's a "crack head loser" lol

[TheUsername27]

Yeah. I'd say let him know so that is fucks up her relationship... not so much for his benefit.

[MrAssHat]

move on dude that bitch is fucked up for sending that shit.. ok so ill explain.. the only reason she's contacting u is because her and the other guy she LEFT you for went south and she wants good ole reliable back until she finds something better.. she's USING YOU so dont fall for that shit

[OjosOscuros2]

Honestly, I would normally tell people to ignore their ex and shut them out, but she could be in danger. I think you should somehow make sure that she's safe, but keep your distance. Don't give her the impression that you're getting back together with her, because really what she needs is help rather than to be in relationships.

[OjosOscuros2]

The reason why I said this is because drug abuse is no joke. I mean yeah she hurt you but what it sounds like is that she's self destructive and people like that aren't normal, they need help. Hoping she's not getting into drugs herself, that's what I meant by making sure she's safe.

[TheUsername27]

No girl would care about a guy enough to do shit like that. Leave her sorry ass. Why should you care about someone who left you for a druggy or anyone for that matter.

[OjosOscuros2]

I don't think you know every girl out in the world, so your assumption that a girl would never do that is ridiculous and arrogant.

[lanamyqueen]

She left you for a druggie, she doesn't deserve you. Move on because she didn't realize you were the one for her until she lost you which means that she'll probably get tired of you again.
You should be smart and realize that she's not a keeper, move on, you'll find someone better.
There are plenty of fish in the sea.

[RJGraveyTrain]

NOOOO!!!

Fuck that. You are no one's fucking second option. She dumped you for a loser and only wants you back because she realized the grass wasn't greener and she can get more outta you then this guy. She lost her chance. Respect yourself and make her live with her decisions.

[Mynameisnottolong]

Lay down the law keep her at arms reach never letting her get to close, tell her that if she wants you back that badly and thinks she'll dump you again drop her like a ton of bricks. Tell her the idea of how hard it is to come back from a broken heart.

[Darsh_112]

Give her a second chance, if you can.
If you think she is slipping away again, just give it a break. Don't get too much attached with her after you patch up.
In a nutshell,
Keep no expectation from her till you are pretty sure about her.

[Asker]

Well, what should I do if I tried to reconcile, and she replied back with "I was sad and tired. Ignore what I said." And then ignores my texts?

[Darsh_112]

If she does that, just try to get over her, it will be difficult and will take time, will hurt a lot, but if your girl doesn't realize that you are better than the drug addicted, than she doesn't deserve you.

[TheUsername27]

She left you for another guy... dude no. Don't be a cuck. A lot of girls seem to love this idea of upgrading men when they come across one better. Leave her you can do better. There are a lot of crazy women... you found one of them... go find the non-crazies.

[blackrose8]

what do you mean.. "i was dumped by my girlfriend by some loser" .. she left you for "the loser" or she asked "the loser" to say she didn't want to go out with you?

[Asker]

It's a typo. I meant to say that she dumped me for some loser.

[blackrose8]

ohh, ouch, personally i don't think you should get back with her. she hasn't even said sorry and tried to get back on good terms with you. She just showed up out of nowhere and said she needs you.
you are NOT a second option or a back-up plan !!!

[slatyb]

People make mistakes. Especially young people. Follow your feelings. She may become the best girlfriend ever, with a new appreciation for you.

Don't have sex with her until she is tested for StDs.

[Asker]

Well, what should I do if I tried to reconcile, and she replied back with "I was sad and tired. Ignore what I said." And then ignores my texts?

[slatyb]

Then you misjudged her. It happens. What you do is ignore any further advances from her, and date other girls.

[Jonze89]

You have 3 good options...

First, under ZERO circumstances allow yourself to have any emotion concern for her. She's a Shitty Whore.

Your options...

1) just fuck her and date other people until you find a new girl

2). Ignore her, or forward her text messages right back to her without adding any words

[Crapulux]

She had unprotected sex with a drug addict. Would you like me to draw you a nice picture of a cute spiky virus?

Also, she could be pregnant.

Run for your life.

[JoyGirl]

Lmao 😂

[Crapulux]

@JoyGirl yeah, our customer's ex-GF needs a STD test and a shrink, not a boyfriend, I guess.

[Thisperson98]

I do know people who have went though almost the exact same thing and they got back together and now they have been happily married for over 20 years.
But I suggest extreme caution, because I have seen the opposite happen a lot.

[Asker]

Well, what should I do if I tried to reconcile, and she replied back with "I was sad and tired. Ignore what I said." And then ignores my texts?

[Thisperson98]

Yea, she isn't worth it. Move on and forget about her.

[Asker]

Not exactly easy to do.

[Gonetowardthewind]

No they are an ex for a reason. Never try to date an ex again no matter how much feelings you still have for them.

[jjesica346]

Omf, you know she is doing drugs, right? Nobody starts a relationship w a crackhead if they aren't one. She will use you for money, while sleeping w both of you. Dont, dont, and dont do it!

[SimplySuperb]

Hahahaha say "Ya, I am pretty great aren't I. Sorry you made a bad choice breaking up with me and you need help now, but that isn't my problem anymore"

[Anonymous]

Help her and dump her. Tell a lie that you are in relationship and test her.

[Poppykate]

Why would this help her? 🤔

[Opinion Owner]

It is a fact poppy that if you love some one, you cannot simply leave them. Probably she might want to restore relationship. Trust me the chances are very slim. The best one can give is care as a friend and get her settled with some one. Telling that you are in relationship with someone definetly makes her realize that his ex should deserve that.

Finally it is a different game playing hide and seek. Imagine her ex could have told that he is in relationship with k. Imagine when her ex says that k is troublesome. Just test whether she trying to help her ex recover his existing relationship with k or make him cheat k and sleep with Him. If the latter is true then she will definetly cheat in near future.

If there is still good heart left in her, then he can restore the relationship. Playing this game also heals the past wounds. Imagine how she would feel when her ex says that he has invented this lie.

[Poppykate]

I really don't understand why all the drama. Why not just be truthful with each other and how each feel about each other.

[Asker]

@Poppykate That's nearly impossible with my ex's personality and tendencies. She thinks I hate her now for whatever reason.

[Poppykate]

You can always apologise.

[Asker]

@Poppykate For what? I've done nothing wrong.

[CluelessBUTTERFLY]

Is gunna hurt but dnt do it if you have trust issues... it will get bad

[writing_essays]

I would take her back. She realized she made a mistake and she won't do it again.

[SimplySuperb]

Ya right, those who wonder back normally do the same stuff

[TheUsername27]

You're either the girl or have done this to men/plan to..

[SimplySuperb]

@TheUsername27 I think you might be right my friend lol

[TheUsername27]

@SimplySuperb No one who isn't mentally deficient would say ''she won't do it again''... as if they know what she is like lol... girls love defending each others actions but the other way around they'd probably try and create some sort of false rape claim.

[SimplySuperb]

@TheUsername27 haha

[Marinepilot]

Be careful. Once bitten twice shy. Can you ever trust her again? If the answer
is no, then there's your answer.

[Anonymous]

No , don't take her back cause then your telling her , that you are ok being plan B.