Girl keeps flaking at last minute

[Anonymous]

So, this girl acts really into me. She wants to kiss and be real physical when we hangout but we be only hung out a couple times but we be been texting all day everyday for the last couple weeks, I've mentioned a relationship and she said she's not ready for a relationship because she just got out of one but wants one with me down the road , whatever that means. But I think since then she's been f*** it let's slowly move towards a relationship.

But one thing that bothers me, every time we try to make plans, she all of a sudden becomes busy at the last minute. And it pisses me off because I wait around for her or make time for her just to say ohh I'm too busy, let's hangout another time. Its either family matters or she has to babysit some ones kid etc. So I don't know if everything this girl is doing is a grand coverup for talking to another guy(s) or she's legitimatly busy and has obligations?

So, thing is. I confronted her about it and basically told her this is not okay if your just wasting my time like this and if she continues I'm going to find another girl who actually wants to spend time with me. And her response was I'm just assuming thingsand bbasically all in my head blah blah blah. And that she was sorry if it appears this way but its not she promises etc etc. And she d make it up to me. Well, now the past day or two she hasn't been texting me much. Supposidly , she's sick with the flu. Idk. I mean but I basically told her look if she's trying to stop talking to me then just tell me. And not to let me get close to her if she didn't want that. And just break things off if that's what she wants. And she said that's not what she wants, she swears and that she cares about me a lot and wants me in her life and wants to spend time with me. But it feels her actions have spoken otherwise and I just don't know. This kinda female behavior really pisses me off because it really wastes peoples time and hurts peoples feelings. and its just conpletely dishonest. Whether you like someone should be a yes or no question , not yes but I really mean no.

So if a girl is swearing up and down she still really likes you and wants to spend time with you and wants you around but acts colder and more distant like this, wtf is going on? I'm just really frustrated right now and don't know what to do.

[Theguyoverthere]

This girl wants your attention but doesn't want to give you what you want(a relationship in this case). You honestly need to remove your ties from her because there's basically a glass wall in the way that you're having trouble seeing. It feels like you have a chance to be close with her but you really don't. She wants to hold you in that spot knowing you'll give her all sorts of attention without her having to do anything. She's a player.

Thing is, once you move on, she's gonna chase you hard! This'll make moving on very difficult but you just gotta keep it in the back of your mind that she is not fit as a good partner for you or anyone for that matter. The key is to remember that you want to be with someone who also wants to be with you naturally. Having to fight over seeing her is your sign right there that she doesn't have a natural desire to spend time with you. A girl lie this is still in the childish mentality of "chase games" and will probably get used by lots of players.

[Asker]

Which exactly what happened. I ve backed away over the past few days and she's saying she misses me now. But now I'm saying let's hang out and give her attention, she goes back to ignoring. I just thought she just needed space or I was being too "available" which is why I started talking to her again...but maybe its more than that and I just need to cut ties completely. But why would she flat out lie to my face? How many women can do that with a straight face?

[Theguyoverthere]

Because she is confused herself. It's a "Want what I cannot have" type of syndrome and you're stuck in it. If she has you, she doesn't want you. If she doesn't have you, it bothers her to no end. I've been through this type of situation with a girl myself. It never works out.

[Asker]

And I hate that. Ughh.

[Prof_Don]

This girl is sapping you for attention but doesn't want to date you. It's time to move on to the next dating prospect. 8-)

[Asker]

Yepp and I don't like to be sapped for attention or be played .

[Prof_Don]

More girls do this than they realize dude.

[harveykinkle]

I'd never cancel a date with a guy I like!

Find someone else! Actions speak larger than words!

[Asker]

I agree. She said family matters or what not she couldn't avoid. But she never made any attempt to reschedule.

[Anonymous]

It happens. It's up to you whether you want to continue on this road.