Having seen numerous G@G questions involving The No Contact Rule, I decided to write my first MyTake so I or you, if you agree with me, can reference it when answering such G@G questions.
In my decades of experience, I am confident in asserting that The No Contact Rule will fail almost 100% of the time. The longer "no contact" is in place by either side, the less probable a failed relationship will recover.
I want to explain why The No Contact Rule fails by giving an example...
Fast food chains such as McDonald's and Burger King want you to buy their fast food so they advertise.
One day, some Marketing executive at McDonald's has an idea. Being a firm believer in The No Contact Rule, she decides to reduce the marketing budget and drive up sales by using The No Contact Rule.
Her thinking is this: If McDonald's doesn't advertise, then people will miss McDonald's, wonder what happened, and then want to come back to McDonald's to find out, and then stay and buy more food.
However, the reality is that Burger King hasn't stopped advertising - they are not doing no contact and they are keeping in contact with the fast food customer base. So, while McDonald's keeps up The No Contact Rule and doesn't advertise, Burger King is getting improved sales because, without McDonald's advertising, those people wanting their fast food weren't thinking of McDonald's, but, seeing Burger King advertisements, they were motivated to instead go to Burger King.
After a month of McDonald's losing millions in sales, this McDonald's Marketing executive is fired and her story becomes required learning in business schools across America.
It's the same with relationships. While you are having no contact, the other person is having plenty of contact with your replacement and is very quickly learning that 1) they can survive without you and 2) you really weren't all that special.
This is especially so for young heterosexual men who are constantly horny. On evolutionary grounds, they are hard-wired to constantly be on the prowl for available sexual partners. So, if a young heterosexual man is no longer getting his emotional and physical needs met by his last woman who initiated using The No Contact Rule, then he will begin to look elsewhere for the next available woman to fulfill those needs. Even if he is monogamous and totally in "true love", now that he is single again, a part deep-down inside of him recognizes the opportunity that this new freedom presents to "legally" be with another woman. He may not actively seek a different woman, but when another woman approaches him that he finds attractive, then he is very likely to get into a rebound relationship with her.
Put in sports terms, the failed relationship is like a fumbled football and The No Contact Rule is equivalent of doing nothing and letting the other team pick up the ball and run it in for a touchdown.
The No Contact Rule For Getting Over Your Ex
As for employing the No Contact Rule for getting over your ex, I believe that its efficacy may depend on who did the dumping. I strongly suspect though that it works - especially for the Dumper, but will take longer for the Dumpee.
I will let others comment on that because I have not thought this out much, but have some deeply personal experience in this area that I do not wish to discuss at this time.
Final Comments
I hope you have learned something and have not and will not ruin any of your relationships using the poorly thought-out tactic of using The No Contact Rule to get your ex back because this tactic fails to recognize true human nature.
I welcome comments to a point. If you want some personal advice, I will consider answering a PM.
If you wish to comment on this MyTake though, you may not do so anonymously. I have never done anything anonymously at G@G and, if you comment, then you should be mature enough and responsible enough by "putting your money where your mouth is" by identifying yourself.
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