My Divorced Family: My Story

Disclaimer: This is all my personal story. I'm not sharing this just for the sake of sharing it but rather as something that might help someone else who went through or is going through the same thing and doesn't really understand how to deal with it. (All names are substituted to protect the identities.) I hope this might help but if not it might give you perspective into someone else's life.

When I was 3, my younger sister (Robin) was born. When I was 6, and she was 3, my parents told us they were getting divorced. I was at the end of my kindergarten year. Within months, my parents had separate houses and I began to alternate between the two, carrying my sister along with me.

With my mom, we moved into a small two bedroom apartment next to my elementary school. My sister and I shared a bed, along with the puppy that slept in our room. I remember Robin would slip out in the middle of the night to sleep with my mom, scared.

With my dad, we moved into a small house on a residential street with lots of kids. Robin and I shared a room with two separate beds. I was the mother there, from age 6. I helped make dinner, got Robin up for school, made breakfast and our lunches, basically took care of her.

My whole elementary school "career," I spent barely getting through day after day of endless bullying at school just to come home and cry for an hour every night. Then start all over the next day.

Fast forward to the end of my fifth grade year. My mom got remarried. My stepdad (Ted) and my two new step-siblings (Sarah and Brent) moved in. I liked them well enough but my dad didn't like to hear about them and whenever my sister brought them up he was closed off. I continued to care for my sister and was even a mother figure at my mom's house now. She didn't pay as much attention to her as the new additions to our family took up more space. She's better now but I still care for Robin at both houses. I love my family, as well as the additions. My mom and her husband have been happily living together for 3 years now along with us four kids that rotate in and out throughout the week.

My dad had a new girlfriend that I love and thank goodness my sister does too.

I love my family to my dying breath but I don't think I would so much if I knew that we were all together even more after this separation. To be even cheesier, if that's possible, I would like to say that the saying is somewhat true. Two happy houses are better than one unhappy house, at least in my case.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Thank you for sharing. I'm sorry you had to grow up so fast and help raise your sister while you were a child yourself. Your an awesome brother; your sister is extremely lucky to have such a caring and loving older brother. I'm the oldest of 3 and my folks stayed together though they probably should have parted as ma was batshit crazy (bi-polar and overactive/under-active thyroid). My brother and sister are my closest and dearest friends. I'm very hesitant to get involved with women due to my experiences throughout my life time.

    What are your thoughts on marriage? What did you learn from your situation?

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    • Actually make that older sister =] however I am more skeptical about marriage because of this experience

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    • I don't know if I want to find someone with the same background. I just want to find someone who loves me for me no strings attatched.

    • Good luck gigi. I've been looking for a long time...

Join the discussion

What Guys Said 7

  • It's almost like marriage is a shitty deal for all involved or something. Had they chosen to stay together for the sake of their children, resentment would grow. Divorcing puts children through a bunch of shit, too. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

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    • I remember when my parents fought when I was a child and I so like this situation a bit better than that

  • I don't want to ever be divorced. I believe I've good of a job as I can at picking the best person I can to prevent that.

    Sometimes divorce is the best option. People change over time. People sometimes even marry for convenience. (I. e. Already with them. Too much trouble to start again, etc.) If the couple is not truly compatible , everyone in the household will be miserable.

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    • Most couples don't go into a relationship expecting it will end, but yeah I see where you're coming from

  • I heard your story. It seems that things are settling for the better now. I wish you happiness in your future life whenever it is possible.

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  • Very touching and an interesting perspective on living life with reasonable success with divorced parents!

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  • I have been through something similar

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  • Sometimes there is No good answer. If a couple stays together and fights more and more it creates certain problems including abuse, and cheating, if they divorce it can create completely different problems.

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  • I'm sorry for your loss.

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What Girls Said 13

  • Amazing story dear, you deserve a standing ovation for being who you are and for caring for your sister at such a young age, I am so sorry that you have been through this, my parents are also divorced and I know the feeling.
    Wish you the best luck <3

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  • Glad it's working out so well for you. My parents waited until I was about your age to even begin this journey of vitriol.

    It's over now, but then again it's never over.

    My mom is happily remarried and my dad has finally found a good girlfriend that we all like (for about 2 years now).

    But my parents... don't get along... and may never. So we end up in the middle of shit that we should have nothing to do with... and I will be 22 this summer.

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    • Thanks for sharing. I'm sorry your parents don't get along though. 😕

  • Do you like How I Met Your Mother? Just cuz you used Robin and Ted as names XD

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    • Lmao I didn't even realize it must be a subconscious thing I love HIMYM 😄

  • This story is cool, happy about the ending for you guys.

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  • Divorce is good

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  • It is horrible when kids get caught up in the middle of it

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  • Poor you.

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  • Thank you for sharing as a soon to be divorce parent this gives me hope.

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  • touching

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  • I honestly don't care if someone's parents get a divorce. Boo hoo, move on, other people have worse issues.

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  • Would you have rather your parent stayed together for the sake of the children?

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  • I'm sorry to hear about your family's divorce. I know having your parents go through a divorce is very difficult. Both my mother and father are together but every now and then my mother always picks arguments with him. Even though my father does a lot for our family. The other day my mother found some luggage in her car and threw it in the trash. I came downstairs to see what the fuss was about they were just going back and forth. My dad kept telling her to stop but she wouldn't. I couldn't take it and just told them to separate. But now they have made up. I just think they would be better off apart. I can tell my dad is tired of putting up with my mother's bull crap but somehow continues to stay. Plus my mother is an alcoholic and when she drinks the devil comes out of her mouth and I have told her many times that my dad isn't going to forgive her. He's going to walk out and never come back.

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    • I'm very sorry. If you need help please do message me I hope you'll be ok.

  • Sadly :(

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