Men, is it a blow to your ego when an ex doesn't chase after you or beg you to take her back?

[Anonymous]

Or, does it bug you when you are playing mind games with an ex by texting, etc and she blocks you? Just curious.

[Orion1084]

I actually find it incredibly annoying if an ex chases after me and/or begs me to take her back.

Yes, this has happened to me, and all it did was bug me. If I break up with someone, there is a reason for it. I don't just arbitrarily dump someone; I give it a lot of thought first. If there are serious problems that can't be worked out, then why would I ever want her back. If I thought the problems could he overcome, I wouldn't break up with someone in the first place.

Yes, it hurts and it sucks getting dumped (I've dumped, and been dumped, so I know), but by ending a relationship that has no future, it allows both people to move on, and find someone they're more compatible with. When a girl tries to get back together with me after the relationship has ended, it just reaffirms the choice I made when ending it.

[kheserthorpe]

I really only broke up with one ex where it was a really serious relationship.

I did not text or play mind games.

I was pretty clear it was over. She didn't beg or chase.

[Asker]

I respect what you did. Every time he texted, it made me think he might have realized he made a mistake by letting me go. :(

[scorpseason93]

I'll answer as a girl who's been through it - YES! I used to be crazy about someone , they could do anything and I would forgive them and one day after distancing myself and taking time - I learned they would never change and there are better guys out there. I'm a bigger person enough to reply if he asks me a questions or something but he makes efforts to get my attention and be seen and they are always denied by me - I can tell this bothers him. When a guy does stupid stuff and one day the girl decides she's done he's left confused, thinking wow what was it that finally set her off? or who did she meet that didn't treat her like that? Ultimately they realize they missed out on a great girl and can't accept it and almost want her more because she isn't as easy to come back.

[Asker]

Thanks for your response. I hope he's pissed. :)

[tfgmg]

No, we don't care. The flyer text messages you are referring to are just little appeals and regrets. Bouts of loneliness, etc, etc. You escaped a fun person who wasn't for you, don't dwell on the past, it seems you have a magnificent future. Surround yourself with people like that and get offline, back in life.

[Asker]

Thanks for your response. It was a bit confusing. You said the messages were "appeals and regrets". Can you explain? Also, I have reason to believe he's seeing someone...So that confuses me more. Shouldn't SHE be who he's texting? I'm slowly getting back to myself. We were together ans best friends for many years. I'm missing my best friend!!! :(

[tfgmg]

Appeals and Regrets are what we all go through when something becomes distant. We remember the good, the wonderful, the magnificent. My only point was to take that wonderful, that capacity of love and passion that you have, and move on. It's hard, it's a bugger, but focus on the good. You seem to have too much going for you to get hung up. Yes, it's easy to say that, but so freakin true. The memory of something can be a tricky devil. BFF, etc etc, etc, these are all circumstances of life, just timing. Friends in college, well, they were in college with you. Mom's and Dad's have friends from Kindergarten only cause their kids are in kindergarten together. And they end up being great friends. It's not about dismissing the past, it's about loving the future, and all the futures there will be. I ranted, but hope it helps

[meowcow]

I find guys are less likely to gain much satisfaction in having their ex beg for them back. For the most part, if the guy has no intention of getting back together, he will not care if the ex-gf doesn't come begging.

Girls tend to get more satisfaction when guys come begging back

[Asker]

Ok...So he dumped me, but kept initiating contact. I finally had to block him because I was tired of being hurt. Please explain that...I'm struggling to let go.

[meowcow]

Guys are typically less likely to hold a grudge after a failed relationship. A lot of guys prefer to keep in contact in a minimalistic way, such as texting...and eventually let it settle to a platonic friendship.

I have some guy friends who still chat with 3-4 of their ex's. My best friend (who will also be my best "man" for my wedding, is also an ex-gf from a relationship over 5 years ago).

[cudaboy]

No not at all. If I wanted her I never would have broken up with her.

[Asker]

I agree with you, which leads me to ask, would you be texting an ex if you dumped her? He had been, for some messed up reason. So I blocked him. :)

[cudaboy]

I personally hate texting, aside from the ruining late or call me. If I can't say it in person or on the phone (voice) then its not worth saying. Anyhow, in general if the breakup was good and stayed friends or had some specific reason (had a mutual pet for example) for it then id call.

[NoblesseOblige]

lol if he's talking to you and you block him it will bug him yes lmao

[Asker]

Ha ha...good. :)