Should I buy my ex a graduation gift?

I am on the fence about buying my ex a small graduation gift. I was thinking of sending him an Edible Arrangements basket. I was going to buy him something much more expensive, but we are not together anymore. He graduates this week from a 5 year surgical residency.

He broke up with me two weeks ago. He realized, after speaking to his ex wife, that he is still in love with her. They had not spoken in 2 years, and she called to ask for help. They are not getting back together. He said I was an amazing woman, but he is not ready to give me what I need right now. I asked him if this was the only reason for the breakup and he said yes. It was a very non dramatic conversation, and we are both hurt and saddened. We wished each other well. We have not had any contact since.

I also realize the struggles he went through to complete his residency. His divorce played out in front of his coworkers, he almost lost his residency position, and was able to rise to chief resident in his final year.

Is it appropriate for me to send him something saying congratulations? Even though we are not together, I am still very proud of him.

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  • I wouldn't. If you are broken up, then that is it. He may be looking to move forward and may not want continued connection with you.

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