My boyfriend broke up with me because I am overweight?

we dated for 3 months and then he said he doesn't feel attracted to me anymore. i am loosing weight but i haven't seen him since i started my weightloss journey i lost about 12 lbs till now. i started 2 weeks ago. He broke up with me last week. It hit my confidence really bad. i even tried to talk to him about working it out but he just doesn't want me anymore. he said he doesn't feel the attraction anymore. he lives in another state. i dont know what to do? this is killing me inside. should i delete him off my fb? drop all the contact. we were supposed to see each other in August and thats when i planned to surprise him with my new body shape and size. please someone help me. he was very rude to me when he broke it off with me over the phone... what do i do? i want to prove him wrong and show him that i can lose weight and be fabulous as well.. a part of me really wants him bad but the other part of me is shocked at this behavior of his because he doesn't value my personality. i m so broken right now. i need major help:( i want to show it to him once i lose weight show him what he missed out on. do i remove him from my fb friends list? what will make him come back to me?

Updates:
by the way i m 5'4 and 165 lbs

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Delete him on Facebook and block him if you think you're going to have a hard time preventing yourself from contacting him. Drop all contact.

    Listen to me and listen well: you do not need people in your life who prey on your insecurities in order to make you feel worse. A boyfriend should not be pressuring you to lose weight but instead support you when you make that decision of your own accord. Do NOT get back together with him under ANY circumstances. I don't care if he begs on his knees in the pouring rain - you do NOT need someone in your life who makes you feel like shit on purpose.

    So you continue on your weight loss journey because it's something that YOU want to do for YOURSELF and not because it will make him want you back.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 14

  • I can bet you he is or was already talking to another girl living in another state. he's gone girl, so here's what you do, continue with your weight loss journey, get really fucking hot and start dating a guy 10x better looking than him. post that shit all over your fucking social media.

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    • should i remove him from my fb?

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    • That's my purpose in life lol ;)

    • Wth you guys should help me!!! Not make your own love story over my break up story!! Lollll hahaha

  • there's NO need 2 bother wid such a person anymore actually... he simply didn't care bout u... and don't lose weight just for him... lose weight ONLY coz u WANT IT.

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  • Remove him from your FB. You're clearly doing a great job losing weight already and without sacrificing your health, it doesn't happen overnight. He's being impulsive and expecting miracles. Don't try to make him come back to you. Keep at the weight loss and let someone else appreciate the working you're doing for yourself. Also notice I mentioned "for yourself." You shouldn't work out just to please another person. Just don't take him back and I honestly recommend cutting contact to make sure that doesn't happen.

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  • I want to tell you this... Work your butt off, lose the pounds, prove him wrong... But don't take him back.
    It's his loss... He could have just asked you to exercise more and joined you for motivation, instead of breaking up.

    Be strong. Lose the pounds, be proud, but don't take him back.

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  • Good thing that he beoke up with you looser like him doesn't deserve a girl like you who dump their girlfriend because of overweight :/

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  • did you gain a lot of weight in the three months after you first started going out with him? if you were already overweight then it's safe to say that isn't the reason he broke up with you. why would he want to go out with you in the first place even though you're overweight, and then break up with you for that very reason? it just sounds like he isn't attracted to you anymore, and it has nothing to do with your weight. if this is the case then you can't do much to get him interested again. it happens. you can't talk him into being attracted to you. this is just my own guesswork but it sounds like he left you for another girl because people don't just lose attraction for their partner. i think you should just move on, which shouldn't be too hard because he really doesn't sound all that great. it's good that you are trying to lose weight. i would advise that you continue down this road, but do it for you, not for him. since you are trying to forget about him now you should delete him from facebook as well, maybe block him too so that he can't add you again or message you. i doubt he will, but just in case.

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    • No I have been the same weight throughout. 2 days before the breakup he said his ex from 2 years came back and msgd him and wanted to hang out with him. He said he didn't message her for a long time. Then I said how can he talk to her with me being here he said sorry and begged me a lot and I said it's over I cannot trust him. He said he needs me I didn't listen to him. I felt betrayed. The next day I approached him because I thought about it and just calmed down u can say. Then he said he doesn't want me and ended up breaking with me saying he's not attracted to me anymore. by the way this is a long distance relationship he lives 6 hours away from me. The last time we met we were fondling with each other in the bed then he stopped I asked him what's wrong he said nothing. Then I forced him he said its ur weight I want u to lose weight. I felt so hurt that time. I think my weight is the issue. I don't think there is any other girl plus he said he's not ready for a relationship too.

  • Get in shape and look better. Shock him when you look better and upgrade to a better guy with a better personality. Why would you want to go back to some one that left you so easily. It's hard to do... but It takes time to forget people especially removing them from anything helps.

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  • Pixlr editor.
    You could lose a ton of weight on facebook right now.
    Its what all the celebrities do.

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  • Even if you lose the weight, don't take him back. He was shallow for dumping you. Its best to move on.

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  • no good looking guy wants to date a chubby girl the same way no good looking girl wants to date a short guy. at least you can loose weight some guys are stuck with their so at least be grateful

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    • not true!!! i think short guys are cute! he was short too and i still fell for him! its about the charm!

  • For starters, you shouldn't change for someone else's approval. The guy doesn't even live in the same state anymore. He isn't coming back for ya

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  • First off he's a jerk, but you now know what us fat/overweight guys go
    through welcome to the club. But I refuse to lose weight.

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    • i would not reject a guy if he's fat if i actually have some amazing chemistry with him. plus i am just few lbs overweight not grossly obese

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    • no i would never if i think he has an amazing personality. i dont think any girl would. also loosing weight is not a bad thing it only gives you more confidence and positive feeling!

    • Women don't care about personality they care about what the guys looks like
      then maybe then personality plays a role. And don't get me started on the
      whole confident BS. I just refuse to lose it.

  • Thats bullshit tell him size ain't nothin but a number chubby skinny thick theyre all beautiful and sexy you'll find tons of men/women who will appreciate your appearance no matter what trust me

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  • i bet he has a new girl and that's just an excuse for the break up
    he doesn't deserve you so don't go running back to him if he wants you back for your new shape

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What Girls Said 14

  • You shouldn't be with him anyways. That's was inconsiderate of him to just break up with you because of your body weight. You should be looking for someone who likes you for you & not just what your weight, height, or personality is. All of it is beautiful, inside & out! Good luck on that journey of yours!

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  • Please please listen to me. Im overweight and by far more than you. I have an amazing boyfriend who loves me and treats me with respect. he's not the only boyfriend i have ever had. I've had 5, the first one made a comment to me about my weight in the throws of passion and he was history the next day, because i won't tolerate it. After that, i have dated and never once had anyone disrespect me not even in a heated argument when tempers say all sorts. My point is, be yourself, be confident and men will love you for your confidence and happy nature regardless of your weight because they find it sexy. The ones who dont appreciate your fuller figure can go find someone they prefer and it should be no loss to you. Love and respect is what you need and you will never find it in this guy. Please trust me. He is immature and will never treat you with respect wether you are slim OR curvy. he's just that type of guy. Let him go and be another girls headache, not yours. 2 years from now you will look back on the initial heartache you felt and be relieved you let him go. When i dumped my first boyfriend it hurt a lot, it wasn't easy. But my pride wouldn't let me take him back, i knew he would never make me happy. I think deep down you know this too. Its just the hurt making you want to cave in. DONT CAVE IN. You will be surprised how being strong about this makes you more confident. Now, regarding the weightloss, i am so pleased for you. I've been overweight since i was 3. Im 40 now, I've never managed it. The fact you have lost so much already tells me you are strong willed enough to get through this. Dont loose weight for him though, he's not worth the comitment. Loose the weight for yourself, to feel healthier and happier if thats what you want to do. You seem a lovely person with a lot to offer the right guy. he's out there, and he won't be the only guy interested in you either. I didn't loose any weight for my first boyfriend, i just sent him on his way. 3 months later i met a gorgeous italian guy who idolised me, we were out one night and a friend pointed out his ex girlfriend. She was slim and pretty. He chose to date me for me, and never tried to change me. We also bumped into my ex, who to my dismay was gutted id found someone else, yet i hadn't lost any weight. But i had moved on to better and you will too. Good luck hun and remember! never accept a man whos not good enough for you, otherwise you pave the way to a very unhappy life, and life is too short for that x

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    • PS - i personally would delete him from facebook. This will send the message that slim or not... You no longer need OR want him!
      I

    • wow your opinion literally brought smile to my face!!!:)

      honestly he always made me feel like shit. he even talked about his ex girlfriend who he was madly in love with he said she had a nice figure. when i checked her pics on facebook i could tell she is fatter than me! i told him this he was like yeah she got fat now but she was skinny before when she was with me. also when i met him second time we were in the same bed and fondling with each other. he suddenly stopped and i asked him whats wrong and he told me that i need to lose and i am fat. i got so upset and i almost began to cry obviously he could see it but i controlled my tears and walked out of the room. this hurt me so much. but yet i took it in a positive way and told myself maybe he is trying to help me out here and i am not being able to see it. despite the fact we both agreed to meet in August and before even July arrived he let it all go in couple days after that event. i couldnt even prove it to him.

    • today i deleted him off my fb. he has made 0 attempts to get back to me (text or call) i just hope one day he does it!!! soon preferably!

  • A man who dumps you because of a weight problem isn't worth it. If he had a issue with your weight he should of just talked to you not broken up with you.

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  • What you should do is if you want to, continue to lose weight. Show him that you are beautiful inside and out. But DONT take him back. He's not worth your time. If he breaks up because of your body type, then obviously he wasn't very emotionally attached. He doesn't deserve you.

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  • He's a shallow jerk. And tbh it sounds like an excuse. He probably found someone else

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  • Oh come on! You are not even that overweight!
    Don't bother with him. He has probably found another girl and is making you feel bad to not feel guilty himself!
    Don't feel bad! It's better to find out now than later. And never ever change sooon yourself to please another person. Do it for yourself... They don't deserve you if they don't like how you are!!

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  • The only payback for this is to lose all the extra weight you want, you aren't overweight but if you wqnt to lose weight to feel confident thats fine once you're done with you weight loss journey post a selfie that you like and feel confident in and then don't take him back

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    • so but i shouldn't take him off my fb then?

    • yeah i would keep him on for that reason then when you are with you're weight loss journey you can remove him.

    • Ok fine I'll do that then. But every time we fought I used to initiate contact always. So he always used to call me desperate and needy. I don't wanna seem like I am desperate and waiting for him that's why I still have him as a friend.

  • He's probably cheating on you or he can't stand being in a LDR anymore?

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  • I think it's just a bad excuse, I mean honestly, how much can you possibly have gained in 3 moths..

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  • He was a dick to you. He doesn't deserve your new body.

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  • Girl fuck him, Ok!

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  • I'm sure everyone is telling you that he's an insensitive jerk, but sadly the facts are we can't help what we're attracted to. We can't choose to feel something, or to like something. The important thing here is to KNOW there is NOTHING wrong with you!!! He obviously wasn't right for you, and while I'm sure you're hurting a lot right now, once you heal and some time has passed, you'll have another chance to find someone amazing who is right for you and loves you as you are :) I'm fat and polyamorous. I have 2 boyfriends who aren't even interested in finding another woman to sleep with because they feel satisfied and happy with me. I have a few other guy friends who would like to have sex with me. I just try to be a good person, be open minded and not judge people, and that has earned me a lot of loyal friends and admirers. Don't EVER change anything about yourself, unless YOU want to, for YOURSELF!! Don't ever live to make others happy. If you live for you, the freedom of confidence will inspire others around you, and they will learn to find that same happiness, and they will want someone like you around them :)

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  • I guess now you're free to find a guy who likes you inside and out. Imagine you had an accident tomorrow and fucked up your face, wouldn't you want a man that's still down regardless what you look like. Looks can disappear in an instant, personality is for life. Plus, imagine you got back with him and grew old together... Good luck keeping him when you get all old and saggy.

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  • Yes not worth it.

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