Ended FWB but feel like crap about it.

I ended my friends-with-benefits situation today. The second the words came out, I regretted it. I shouldn't regret it, because it was the right decision. I developed feelings. He didn't.

And I ended it, but didn't tell him that it was because of feelings.

He was cool with it ending, but there is this annoying part of me that just wishes I'd kept my mouth shut, despite knowing that it would have been really bad for me to keep it up when I had feelings.

I think I just need reassurance that I did the right thing. I know that I did, really I do. But I'm having a little bit of difficulty dealing with the fact that I won't get to have wild crazy sex with him anymore. It was really, really good sex. He's an incredible lover, and I tried so hard to stay detached but it got to the point where it was consuming my every thought, and I just spent all day thinking about it and wishing it was more and hating myself for settling for less.

So I did what I had to and walked away, and now what I'm looking for is just a little bit of a firm reminder that doing exactly that - walking away - is something that I will be glad I did sooner rather than later.

Why does it hurt? It wasn't even anything, but I feel so down about not getting to be with him in that capacity again. Help!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Sounds like you knew what you had to do, you did it, and you're in that phase where you're wondering if it really was worth it. Trust me, it was worth it - and I commend you, it's hard ending a relationship that's going to get you hurt in the long run, even in the short term it seems so painful. Just give yourself a little time for your emotions to settle, and you'll see that you did the right thing.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • sex is always something. the feminist would like you to just believe other wise. I think the hardest part is having to tell you future husband you had a fwb. he may not accept it.

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    • I get that for a lot of people it would be an issue, but the kind of person I go for, and generally associate with are far more liberal in their thinking than this. If I were to enter a relationship with someone who had an issue with things like FWB, there would be far greater problems than the fact that in my past, there was one friend with whom I was intimate. People who are conservative, particularly in a sexual context, do not attract me at all.

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    • It wasn't once. a one night stand is once.

    • Now you're devolving into semantics for the sake of being contrary; I had one sexual partner with whom I was emotionally detached.

What Girls Said 3

  • I completely understand ur situation. I'm in the same situation but rather than ending it I just left it. It didn't mean anything so I don't think it requires any kind of explanation. that and the fact that if I change my mind I won't be going back on my word and won't look half as pathetic. It really does suck. You need someone to distract you...someone better.

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    • I felt the same way that if I told him that it was over and I went back that it would make me look pathetic. This is the same reason why I told him not to call me anymore so that way I would not go back because I would not want to look stupid and desperate.

  • I don't agree with the whole FWB ordeal but I truly admire you for being brave enough to end it. You did the right thing hun you protected your heart and you may feel some regret about it now but you did the right thing for you. Sooner than you expect you will get over this and look back on it as something you can laugh about and remember for the right reasons. x

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  • you are a slut...sorry but it's true, hun.

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    • And you're what, twelve? Grow up and stop trying to apply your moral view of the world on me.

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    • Lol you are something else...well I hope you find a new f*** buddy! xoxoxoxo

    • Thanks sugar honey pie!!!! XOXOXOXO

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