My wife cheated with my brother?

Question

It's very hard to type right now but long story short I just caught my wife of 2 years cheating on me with my older brother. I don't know what to do. It's been happening for months. Honestly all I know to do right now is self medicate and come here for help. What do I do? Divorce? Take her back? Oh god the pain is so fucking unbearable. Please help me. What do I do Any advice is welcome

Around 24 hours since I found out (I think?) Following all advice I have received as best as I can. Overwhelmed with despair but finding a little comfort deep within at seeing these comments. I have never had anyone empathize and try to help me like this.. not once. It's a nice feeling to read these comments in the midst of this hell. Update on them: She will only tell me that it is all my fault. She's obviously upset about it but refuses to do anything but put the blame on me. He said I need to just get over it and move on because she is a "psycho bitch." Life is unexplainably difficult, but I believe God will help us all grow from this. Doing my best to remain positive. Thank you all so very much for your comments. I weep as I read them knowing there is someone out there that understands and cares. It's a new feeling to me. Perhaps one I should look for more in life. Feel free to comment anything. Any and all advice is welcome as I endure this agonizing hell. Thank you...

Philyouup · Accepted Answer

Dude.. My wife screwed my buddy of 30 years So I understand the hear crushing pain.. it sucks. and Guess what? It does get better.. Promise you that. A little bit at a time.. Key is forgiveness.. lets you let go and move on.. You won't understand that now.. but once you hit emotional rock bottom, thinking thoughts you never thought you could have, then you'll understand. I am at 2+ years since my heart was extracted manually without surgical tools... and I am starting to feel alive again. I promise it gets better.. it is hell, it Sucks, and you might just think that waking up is not worth it anymore.. I know, i did too. but it does... As for your brother, how you deal with him going forward, is up to you.. but he will be apart of your life until you get called home.. Deal with him later.. after some of the pain subsides. as for her.. Busted Trust.. You will never get it back, even is you say it will. When somebody can cause you pain like that, you will never get it right with them again. it's like a beaten Dog.. they always flinch at a rolled up news paper..

HermitNYC · Accepted Answer

I read other opinions first. If you don't have children, tell her to leave. First separate, then decide about divorce. But she should leave, not you.

You ask, "What do I do? Divorce? Take her back?" If she is 'obviously upset', she may not be able to be honest and admit that no one put a gun to her head, it can not be "all my (husband's) fault".

And your brother probably has some loose screws; he gets into an affair with her and now she's a psycho bitch !!

I just can not see any way you two can reconcile unless she can tell you what made her dissatified, or why she was tempted in the first place. If she can't admit that she has some responsibility, she can't be anyone's wife, but certainly she can't be a wife to you.

Jaye234 · Accepted Answer

Wow. What betrayal. Divorce her and break all ties with them both.
Both know better and knew that they're affair would shatter your marriage and both had sex any way. Not caring about you. This is no way your fault. Even if the wife is unhappy she should've left and divorced you. And any sibling or family member of a spouse or former spouse is off limits- everyone knows that.
Adultery is a sin for a damn good reason.
You deserve better from a wife and a brother. How can they both say they love you.
After the divorce they can screw as much as they want without consequences. Severe them from your life- be a father to your children and be civil toward the ex wife, don't bring the children into the affair or divorce as they've no business knowing what's going on- the truth rather.
And best wishes to you. Keep your faith but do not be a doormat for the wife and brother to wipe their muddy feet on. Take a stance for yourself.

ciitruskiwi · Accepted Answer

I'm very sorry that this happened to you but, and no matter what she says, this is in no way your fault. Don't believe her. She is a grown woman that can make her own choices and needs to deal with the consequences of those choices.

You need to divorce her. If she felt remorse of any sort and took responsibility for her actions there might be a chance at working it out but she isn't taking any responsibility and she's putting the blame on you. I'm sorry but I don't see it working out.

It's a new year and as painful as this is you have the chance to make a new start for the new year. Take it and don't look back.

fauchelevent · Accepted Answer

If I were you, I'd divorce her and do my best to move on. I would probably also cut off contact with my brother. Clearly neither of them had any respect for the relationship you'd built with your wife, neither of them had any respect for how you felt (made obvious by her refusal to accept blame and his belief that you should just 'get over it') and I don't see why either of them deserves to have any contact with you now whatsoever.

kevsduck · Accepted Answer

Ok I've been with the same man 15 years married for four you will never geet over it and it will cause a telationshipof fighting mistrust and misery tou will never trust her again and never be able to bring her riund family cayse you are humiluated end it

Anonymous · Answer

Her reign of terror stops here. You're at a crossroad in your life, and you need to divorce her. She does not respect you at all, and if you give her a pass on this it only proves your low worth to her. She will respect you even less, and continue to torture you. There is no ifs, buts or maybes. The only thing you can do is to divorce her. She had her chance, and she blew it. Remember that you are the price. She has nothing to offer you except pain.

Come on, I beg you to build your strength and end it. She has nothing but resentment for you, she doesn't even accept responsibility for tearing your heart out through your throat. She is a mercy less and manipulative sociopath, and she will not change. It will just get worse.

She will drive you crazy and make you want to commit suicide, and she won't shed a tear for you. You're nothing to her, no matter what she says. Get her out of your life now!

spiderweirdo · Answer

New year, new start. Never take a woman back after this level of disrespect. I mean, your brother? Cheating is messed up enough, but she went and did it with family. Both are as bad as each other. You get yourself together, get healthy and refocus your energy. I hope you move right on 👍

aestheticsofty · Answer

I’m sorry that happened to you. All I can say is - divorce that woman and move on. Look up reasons to never stay with a cheater, AND she cheated with your brother. Maybe cut ties with your brother as well. This is a sick story. But sick shit happens all the time.

MackToday · Answer

They're both psychos and not worth your time, neither one wants to accept responsibility for what they did. You definitely need to divorce this POS as soon as possible. You're so called brother is also worthless as they get, ditch him to, he's no brother at all. Cut off contact with them before they decide to poison your food or something these people are sick.

Greaver · Answer

Leave her dude if she fucks your brother you should cut him off too I wouldn’t want to talk to people who cheat on you with other family members cheating fucking disgusts me why build a relationship and then cheat and destroy everything you built you could just leave and save the opposite sex their trust and sanity and you won’t make it hard for them to find someone else

AzureGirl · Answer

Obviously divorce. She obviously has no respect or commitment to your marriage. It’s best to end it and find someone better.

I would also make sure no future significant others so much as meet that no good brother of yours.

Taure · Answer

Tell that thot to be gone. And tell your brother to fuck himself too. Take a break from work go on holiday, its a shitty situation no doubt. But try and do the things you couldint or postponed before. Stay strong bro 👊

romperstomper · Answer

My girlfriend cheated on me with my son so I guess I know how you feel not nice when its so close to home

Shawn58 · Answer

I'd say divorce her but first I'd investigate like I'd truly wanna know why, like was this going on before you were married is she unsatisfied with something did you guys move too fast or is she just a psycho bitch like you said

SullyB · Answer

I'm so sorry man , I truly feel your pain. Hopefully you will find the strength to do what's right. No one deserves to be cheated on, especially involving their own flesh and blood.

Dinnye001 · Answer

Divorce. And bring this reason to court to prevent alimony or anything.

rm_llort · Answer

You need to hire the cheapest lawyer in available. The divorce shovel. Get one with fratricidal features built in.

Presidentt · Answer

You've just learned a lesson that should've been learned long time ago... Check out Briffault Law.

Anonymous · Answer

definitely divorce, I know its easier said than done but its not healthy to be with someone like that. Be strong.

LittleMissSassyyy · Answer

Divorce. You don’t deserve that.

dragau4 · Answer

Divorce and deny your brother knovk him out too

ClarizzeAlc · Answer

Divorce her, you deserve better.

Billywu · Answer

Divorce her and beat his no good ass

Daddywolfe · Answer

Time to let him. have her

My wife cheated with my brother?

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