My girlfriend cheated on me with her ex boyfriend, she went back to him and now they're moving out together.

[c_deyoung]

Yeah. So, here's the thing. My girlfriend and I had a very happy relationship (so it would seem). It was just last week she was telling people in her facebook status that she loved me so much, etc. She told me every day. I always did good things for her, and treated her like a queen. I was a d*** at times, too, like every guy... but not any more than the next.

She mentioned a few times in the relationship that I had control issues. What she meant by this is when she would want to go out with friends, I would say that I would prefer if she didn't. I wasn't very much into the downtown scene and had some trust issues. There were a few times that I said I'd change (which I did slightly), however, apparently it wasn't enough for her. She turned around and cheated on me.

Funny thing is, it was only a week ago that we were talking about marriage. She was my girlfriend of ten months, we lived at my parents' house, and were planning on attending school in the fall. The relationship was never really short of love, to be honest... it was quite filled with it. However, she has told me more than once that she was unhappy with it (after she broke up with me).

You'd have to be either one of us to know how much the feeling of love was in the relationship, but for whatever reason she decided that it was best that she cheated on me instead of try to work things out. On the day that she went down to her ex's house, she gave me a kiss, told me that she loved me very much, and left while smiling. However, while she was down at her friend's house (who lived three houses away) she decided to cheat. WHY did she do this? WHY did she cheat instead of talking things over with me like an adult? WE are both 20.

Now she is apparently moving in with him. She claims she doesn't love me, and that she is happy with him. He treated her like absolute SH*T when he was with her (they broke up after about four months) and she still went back to her. While sending text messages to her tonight trying to talk, he sent me one from her phone saying that she was nothing but a piece of ass to him. ON HER PHONE. She claims she's happy with him... wtf? LOL She was SO happy with me before she went down there and even her friends said that I made her so happy (the happiest she'd ever been).

I don't know what to do. What happened and why did she cheat? I am willing to forgive her if she wants to try again, but... I just don't understand where I went wrong. :( I spent the past four days downstairs in the basement watching TV, had no energy, nothing.

[38rakia38]

Sounds like she's just retarded,

It happens.

People seem to enjoy f***ing up a good thing and then living like pigs in sh*t. Which, do you REALLY DESERVE THAT?

Obvious answer is no.

She'll come crawling back when sh*t hits the fan and you, being genuinely in love with her, will take her back and she'll f*** off again and go do something similar.

You want my abrasive, honest, logical opinion? Well, you're going to get it anyway...but anyways...

YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO COW-TOW TO HER BULL SH*T. You deserve to find someone who loves you (really loves you, not half-a** it like this c*nt did) and WANTS to be with you, even if you have issues. If you really genuinely love someone, you accept both parts at the beginning. You accept the bad, annoying issues and flaws, and you accept the good habits and parts that make up YOU. There is no "half-sies" when it comes to love.

If she LOVED YOU, like she claimed, then don't you think she'd be with YOU? That she wouldn't have cheated on you and left you to sit in your basement like a broken toy whose usefulness and "fun" has run out? Survey says, NO.

I know you're hurting, we all get burned. I'm not saying "stop being a p*ssy and get up off your a** and go find a new girlfriend", what I'm trying to convey is a shred of logical and honest reality here. The reality is, your ex is a dumb a**, so let her be filthy in the sh*t sty with her abusive and d*ckheaded ex. BECAUSE YOU DESERVE BETTER THAN THAT!

Cry, scream, yell, hit stuff. Whatever. Get it out of your system and in a month, go out and find that girl who's gonna marry you, who isn't gonna just say "f*** it" and go back to her old habits. Your ex IS NOT going to CHANGE. Not in this lifetime anyway.

GET UP OFF YOUR CHAIR, FEEL YOUR BALLS AND GO "I DON'T DESERVE THIS SH*T!" as loud as humanly possible.

AND WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT F***ING FORGIVE HER. Because she'll DO IT AGAIN. Doesn't sound like she's "learned anything" or is even remotely MATURE for 20. She's a god damn CHILD. Do you want to relive this BULL SH*T again?

I certainly hope not. I certainly hope you have more confidence in yourself and love for yourself to not be retarded.

My rant is over.

[38rakia38]

Life ain't all puppies and rainbows man.

Put all your effort in someone else, someone who actually *wants* to be with you for you.

And if I see an update saying you two are back together, I will internet slap you. Repeatedly.

[c_deyoung]

and her friends tried to even justify her cheating by saying "it wouldn't have been cheating if you guys just broke up", and her sister's boyfriend sent me a message saying my insecurities pushed her to cheat.

[Shaun]

Yeah, sever all contact with those people.

[38rakia38]

Yeah, that's bull sh*t. Like, that part in Jurassic park where they dig through Triceratops sh*t.

Do you really enjoy being fed nothing but bull sh*t, because that's what they're doing. My ex's have been insecure, you don't see me cheating on them. Yeah, I admit it, I cheated once. ONCE. My weakest and lowest point in my life. I was drunk, young, and full of hormones. I can't take that sh*t back. EVER. Even if he forgave me, I will never EVER forgive myself.

THAT'S LOVE, THAT'S RESPONSIBILITY.

[38rakia38]

My last ex was insecure as f***. Jealous of my guy friends (who are all nerds...for god sake), but because I loved him, I accepted that jealousy. I understood it. I made him get to know them, to show him there was 0 to fear of me straying. That right there, is genuine love. I didn't run off and f*** an ex because of it.

[shyguy007]

This happened to me too. Bottom line is some women are stupid, simple. They can never appreciate a guy that cares instead they want to love someone who doesn't give a #### about them. She'll be back as soon as things go bad with him trust me lol Seen it over and over as well as experiencing it first hand.

[val1986]

Like I wonder if it will happen to me.. my ex and I were in a great relationship for 10 months. Then she ended it she cinfessed in a long email how she felt towards me. She send me gifts and remember my birthday and details about me. Then six days before I flew to her she changed on me. Yet I flew to her to try and work things out so that she can see me face to face.

Days after she says I appreciate it but I'm moving on. Then a lady who does clenses told me yes she did like you but some women interfered between you two.

[irykiryk]

Screw that, she doesn't deserve to live with you, get away from that girl and stay away. Next time she tries to talk to you tell her she's a really f***ed up person and deserves no pitty or help from you.

[c_deyoung]

She is f***ed up. I brought her teas to work, I bought her flowers every now and again, I wrote her notes sometimes in the morning tell her I love her, I gave her massages, cleaned when she asked, pretty much everything she could ask for. I just miss her so f*cking much... we spent the last ten months going to sleep and waking up together.

[c_deyoung]

well see I am a man who puts a lot of work into a relationship. I like working things out, even for the worst cause that's what I've been brought up to believe.

[irykiryk]

I hope you've learned your lesson.

[irykiryk]

All in all I give her maybe a week or two before she want's to come back.

[tzdc21]

You weren't in the wrong pal! SHE was! SHE cheated on YOU, not the other way around. And for a guy who treated her like crap, while you made her the "happiest she's ever been" according to her friends. She is an absolute all around backstabbing imbecile. And if I were you I would not give her another chance. Because if she found it within herself to cheat on you once, she can do it again. Don't put yourself in that situation.

[exitseven]

This happens to lots of people. There are many reasons and people sometimes break up in cruel ways. This site makes me relive a lot of really painful memories and your question reminds me of one as well. I guess You just need to try and mourn the loss and think of it as an experience that many guys go through.

[Shaun]

She cheated because she sucks.

[38rakia38]

like a succubus.

[Dom163]

That would make her a bitch forget her