I ran into my ex for the first time in a few years. There is a lot of pain behind the memories I share with him so my first instinct was the just run. But he literally chased me and grabbed my hand to ask for forgiveness from things he did in the past. I said I did but I was still hurt by it deep down. A few weeks later he called my phone number (which I was surprised he still had after all these years) and asked to bring me back a watch he still had that belonged to my deceased family member. I agreed. To my surprise he admitted that he used this as an excuse to come into my life just own more time to admit what he always wished he had done years ago. He told me he still loved me and wanted me back. I resisted him talking me back into it for a while but he started crying saying he wished he could just take everything back. I’m not proud of myself but I still had feelings for him and I slowed him to kiss me which lead to us having sex. During the act he said “I missed you so fucking much. I want you to marry me and never leave my life again.” After we were done I stated crying and told him I was scared to try again. He also started to cry and said that it was the happiest moment of his life and that all he could think of the second we kissed was how he would do everything right this time. He even said that he hadn’t said it out of lust but that he had thought about me for years and thought of marrying me as the thing he should have done along. He drove me out to his mothers house and they all seemed surprised to see me but were very welcoming. He said right in the middle of the room “I love you.” Three days later he came to my house and told me he was already engaged and that he couldn’t ruin his future with her off of a “spur of the moment” thing like running into me. Once again he cried and said he loved me but that he loved her too. After he left I cried and I honestly have never felt worse in my life. Like why?
What do men get out of lying so hard?
