How to tell if you should break of an 8 year relationship with someone (fiancé) a lot of history (sorry for incoming wall of text)?

[Anonymous]

i have lived with them on and off due to uni and also due to her living in another country and now we been living together with my parents for about a year now.

So where we live i am kind of a linchpin as my parents argue a lot and try and resolve it and help them out so that causes me stress. Also get stressed as she has quite high standards of things such as organisation of the house which my parents can't keep to, so every time she goes down stairs i can tell she is annoyed. Also she is very sarcastic to the point where i can't tell if she is being sarcastic or not plus if I use some of her sarcastic replies she seems to get upset about or she goes I don't care and I always feel like i am not doing enough for her even thou i feel like i bend over backwards for her as she has left friends and family to live in a different country with me something i don't think i could do. so I feel like I need to do everything for her to make her happy

She is also sounds rude a lot with her tone, she says it is due to where she is from. She has a few mental health issues like e. g. talks about how she is surprised she made to her age without ending herself and she is depressed so also feel this would ruin her

she is a good person as she is loving to animals and caring towards me times like wants to cuddle up and talks to me about my many issues and sometimes cooks food for me. Plus she helps me out with my mental state sometimes as like i said parents argue a lot (not enough money) plus actually tolerates my parents arguments which I don't think some would do likes similar hobbies. She is faithful understands my failings also was with me when I had no job. she is not materialistic nor does she expect expensive things

Also don't have as much sex as a lot of the time feel off or anxious about starting it. Before she fully moved in we was all good some of the above issues was still there just not as bad

i know it is my decision just wanted to see others thoughts. Thank you

[PrettyPriya]

What I do not see in the details is a reason why you want to break this off. I do see mention of some character traits that are not good like constant sarcasm and being rude. I also see you list many good ones.

Have you talked to her at all about these negative traits or things you view as negative? If so, what was the response. Good communication in a relationship is key and you should be able to talk to her about these things.

Now, if you have made up your mind that it is irreconcilable, then best just do it and get it over with. State the reasons you are not happy and don't feel like you can continue the relationship.

It isn't going to be an easy thing to do, so don't think for a second there won't be a lot of emotion. You need to stand your ground if that is what you truly want to do. Make sure you explain the reasons that you find it impossible to continue.

You also want to demonstrate that you don't believe they will change due to it being a consistent pattern. Often when breaking up, the other party will beg, plead and claim they will change. Almost never does that work out and the person changes.

Good luck to you.

[Guy13]

There is no easy way. Eye to eye. Don't rehash it all likes it’s a courtroom. Please respect my decision. I know I’ve tried so sleeping at night is not a problem. I see no reason to bicker over 💩. Take what you believe is yours. Keep emotions in check. Soft but serious etc.

[Avicenna]

I’d end it-too many red flags, especially the mental health issues

[In_Trance]

Jesus