Break Up & Divorce

How to get over humiliation of begging your ex not to leave?

My ex boyfriend asked me to be his girlfriend after a couple months of dating then a few weeks after he told me he was unsure. Yet he still wanted to stay with me. I stayed and we got into our first argument. He had serious trust issues with me and I got overwhelmed with it. I put it aside and still asked him to go to my friend’s party. Then when we went to a party together I seen him staring at another girl and I thought, how could he have so much trust issues with me and he’s literally starring at another girl. I confronted him about it and he got furious with me, I tried to calm him down and apologized but he left me in the car and I started to cry.
he broke up with me the next day over voice memo, and came and got his things. We never got to talk. I gave him space (4 days) but I later seen he was on a dating site again. I called him and we talked and it didn’t go over well. He told me he just didn’t want to be in a relationship. He wanted to still be friends but I told him I can’t be his option. I finally cried and asked how could he walk away so easily and he hung up on me and blocked me.

i feel humiliated bc the next day I called from my other number and we talked for 10 min, because he said he had something to do. He was still super rude to me but I was calm. He told me if I wanted to talk, text don’t call and hung up. When I went to text him a few hours later, he had me blocked. I got so upset I called off my what’s app number twice and left a voicemail and sent him text asking that he treated me with more respect and he blocked me again. I feel like a lessened my value bc I did that. I am trying so hard to get over the fact that I begged and made myself look foolish to someone who hurt me and could care less about it.

How to get over humiliation of begging your ex not to leave?
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