32 (f) 30 (m) been together 5 months and split up today.
Bit of background we have had a really good relationship the type that are best friends aswell as being together and have never really argued.
3 months into our relationship we found out I was pregnant which was a huge shock I then lost the baby and this made us really strong as a couple.
My boyfriend always has liked to get drunk and take other things aswell as drink. Which he knows I do not support and I have always been clear I never want it around me.
Yesterday I went to get my hair done and came back to him off his face I was really angry he felt the need to do this as I was out. We had a conversation and I said I need to think about things as my boyfriend is adamant this is him and he will never stop. I do everything for this boy and then he does the one and only thing I’ve ever asked him not to do!.
He starts sobbing saying he won’t ever stop and doesn’t want to settle down for another 5 years and he wishes he could give me as much as I have gave him. Since I’ve left I’ve not reached out and he’s messaged me saying how much he will miss me and I’ve ignored him.
I’m completely heartbroken my whole life has been turned upside down within 24 hours
Me and my boyfriend just broke up, now what :(?
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i have some good news. you were together only 5 months so you didn't waste too much time. everything will be okay, you'll heal and move on and find someone better. this happened for a reason and that reason you'll figure out soon enough.
as for the pregnancy loss, i'm so so sorry. that will take awhile to heal from. i'd suggest some heavy therapy for that one. it won't take away the pain, but it will lessen it over time.
another thing, you can't change people. especially when they're in their 30's, they are already set in stone. when you told him you don't support drinking and he did it anyways, that is a sign of disrespect.
you heard it from him. he doesn't want to settle down. for another 5 years! which is a long time. he is not ready to grow up and i feel like you're way more mature than him and it really is for the best that you two broke up. or you two will continue having these arguments and it's not healthy.
to close this, i just want to say that things do get better. i know they really don't seem like they do, i'm struggling with that right now, but it is literally impossible for things to stay the same. it may be years, but it can change and your situation can get better.
Now, you. Now it's time to put yourself first in every little thing you do. You're in the drivers seat now. You're in charge of the change you want to see. You always were and have been, but use this opportunity to make it happen even stronger and drive that car and run it hard. Listen to the silence and be thankful for the fact that you're here.
You're in the driver's seat now. You got this. It's all about getting the sleep, nutrition, exercise, reading you need. Start cultivating new, healthy habits. Cut off the screen time in half, eat healthy, sleep enough. Run half an hour a day, go out on long walks. Find a new hobby, a new passion 😊 how do YOU want to spend your life? ✌️🌻💪
life happens like that, all you can hope is that he fixes his problem on his own, i wish you the best