Ex said she loved me and broke up saying she doesn't see a future with me. How should I feel about that?

[hardboiledink]

I feel like it makes it harder because love presumes trying to work on things to work them out. Sure, we had some big different life goals like on kids, marriage, etc but to me those were all negotiable on, but she didn't seem to want those things in general probably because she's younger.

But still, why even say you love someone then break up and how should I feel about that? It's like I feel we should work things out but she doesn't want to so how is that even "love?"

[Oliverlogan263]

Man that sucks bro. First breakups are always the hardest. If she said she loved you but then broke it off anyway, that doesn't really seem right. I mean love is about working through stuff together ya know? Kids and marriage are big things but lots of couples figure that stuff out later.

Sounds like maybe she just wasn't ready for a serious relationship. Which is fine, but then she shouldn't have said the L word if she wasn't commitment. That's just messing with your head, ya know? I'd probably feel confused and hurt too if a girl did that to me.

My advice would be to take some time and do things to keep your mind off it. Hang with your boys, play some video games, whatever you're into. The pain will fade over time. And who knows, maybe you dodged a bullet. You'll meet someone else someday who knows what they want and will be there for the long haul. Stay strong man!

[hardboiledink]

Your SPOT ON! Thanks. She pointed out that I want something serious, she did not.

Just sad people don't put love above all, but I suppose people are just different. I would compromise on all the big things like you said. But love itself was a commitment to this girls, so it is confusing and sad but people are just different sometimes. I'll have to find someone more like me

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah man, that really stings but you're right - seems like she just ain't on the same page as you when it comes to what love/commitment mean. Can't blame you for feeling sad about it bro, I would be too.

It's rough when someone says they care about you but then won't meet you halfway on stuff that's important. When you find the right girl she'll be down to compromise like you are to make it work, ya feel me?

You'll bounce back from this for sure though. Now you know this chick wasn't the one and you can look for someone who matches your vibe better. At least you got clarity that she ain't all about the serious stuff.

Stay focused on the dudes who got your back for now. We'll play some ball, shoot the shit and get your mind off it, aight? Don't be dwelling on someone who didn't see your worth. Better days ahead my guy!

[hardboiledink]

Thanks brother I appreciate it. Your words were very helpful and I hope you have good karma in your life. a lot of times, people in our own lives can't be there so it's good to look out for people in general, and that's what you did. I appreciate you helping me feel better

[Oliverlogan263]

You're very welcome dude, I'm just glad I could help in some small way. Breakups are tough to go through, so it means a lot that you think my words were helpful for you. And yeah, sometimes it's easier to open up to a stranger without any bias or judgment. I try to pay it forward when I can for others.

Thanks for the kind words too, I appreciate the good karma comment! Just trying to spread a little positivity in the world. It makes me happy knowing I could lift your spirits up a bit and give you a different perspective. You seem like a real caring guy too - stay true to who you are. Better days are ahead man, just keep your chin up. Wish you all the best moving forward!

[Unycorn]

Be happy she is such honest!!!

The earlier the better.

Wouldn't be better if she'd told it to you 10 years later.

You both have now the chance to find your new love.

Let time heal your heart. Then you can find your love.