When to break up with my girlfriend, before her after her birthday?

[Anonymous]

So, I am ready to break up with my girlfriend of about 3 years.

I have tried and tried to make it work, we've tried counselling, but things never get better - she tries for a week or two, then goes back to her old ways, and I can't handle it anymore.

The trouble is, her birthday is a week away.

Should I just do it now and get it over with, or at least let her enjoy her birthday and do it after?

I know she has a place to stay, so that won't be an issue.

Any advice?

Updates

2 mo

Thanks everyone for their advice and opinions.

Regardless of when I do it, she’s going to be unhappy, so I’m going to get it over and done with.

Updates

2 mo

It's done, it wasn't fun, but it's done.

She did all the stuff of swearing she'll change etc, but as I told her, she's told me that many times and it never changes.

Thanks for the advice, I feel like crap right now but it's also a huge relief.

[molonski2]

Don't wait for birthdays and the like , there will always be some date , its time to set her free , tell her today , don't have it hanging over your head , you just need to do it , set the appointment or make that call.

Good luck bro , I hate that job too , be free.

[molonski2]

Good choice bro - update , my argument exactly.

[melnc]

I understand, and I don't want to put more pressure on you but... Isn't there any other way to work things out between you two? I mean, 3 years is a long time being together.

[Asker]

I have tried, including relationship counselling but things never change, and I’m spending more time miserable than happy.

TBH I should have ended it some time ago.

[melnc]

I guess you have no other option. Hope you find someone better. Good luck...

[Dutchgirl97]

Wait. Yes it’s going to hurt but the day you do it will also be a reminder. At least let her enjoy her birthday without a looming memory of being dumped on what is supposed to be a special day

[Anonymous]

Rip off the band aid now but for her birthday send a best of luck and wishes her way. If u do not intend to do Valentine's day, Do this ASAP.

[Opinion Owner]

Tanks, gag. x

[incorrected]

If she hasn't done any work for your happiness for years, why should her birthday be sacred? I suppose if her gossip could hurt you in any way it would to most people make you look better if you waited until after though. Better still if you waited until the next month if opinions may matter. Otherwise though, I wouldn't care much at that point.

[Biya123]

After her birthday, dont spoil her birthday. Please be kind.

[molonski2]

It would not matter on what day he soils it -- he is leaving her , putting it off will cause her much more pain. TODAY is the day.

[Anonymous]

If you wait until after her birthday, and you treat her nicely on her birthday as if nothing is wrong, it will just make it harder and more schocking when you break up with her right after that.

[Unit1]

You are wasting both your time and her time.