Why is my ex boyfriend's new girlfriend so invested in my life?

[Jerseystarlet]

My ex randomly broke up with me. We had a falling out and he came back months later apologizing that he took everything for granted and really wants to make this work he even would send gifts to my house. Things were going really well then out of the blue he ditched me for a 19 year he met at work (he's 29) and turned really mean and cold and wanted nothing to do with me. I was having a hard time with it and when I randomly downloaded instagram his account popped up in my contact list. I posted a comment on a pic saying to please block me its just to hard to see the two of you and I know I'll just sit around and cyber stalk and I can just unblock myself.

I never contacted anyone in over a month then I notice her friends are following me on twitter and when I posted an old pic of the two of us his girlfriend likes it I sent her this article I wrote about how the two girls should not fight and when the guy is the one to be confronted, but she took it all wrong. Next thing I know she is texting me at 1am and won't confess how she got my number telling me it's disrespectful to have pics up of her boyfriend and how can I love someone who hurt me etc.

I tried explaining to her how powerful true love is when you can still care when you've seen their worst. I asked her how would she have known about the pic if I posted it over a month after I said anything

she said she had a "feeling" but then says she loves him and he loves her and she trusts him.(after 3 months?) If she trusts him so much why is she bothering me? my ex has been quiet since that day I asked him to block me so why is she still making it an issue. Me posting pics is my problem and my prerogative not hers she has my ex what more does she want.

I don't want him back I just want to heal from all of this but I can't when she keeps investigating my life

[beastman88]

i still care about my ex, and I would say I do love her in a way that I love some of my very close friends just in no intimate way whatsoever. I also would never want to be in a relationship with her ever again. I gave her my all in return I got a knife in my back.

so yeah just ignore them block them do what's necessary.

[NicholasHalden]

"Know your enemy and know yourself and in one hundred battles you will be victorious" - Sun Tzu

That is what she is doing.

[Jerseystarlet]

someone else said that too, but I really don't care about her only reason I don't like her is 1. she didn't leave it alone when I walked away and 2. she wasn't the one who dumped me. I felt on the phone deep down she was trying to be friends with me but I can't be friends with her when he's still treating me like crap and at the end of the day she's kissing him goodnight. I'd be cool with her if he gave me some respect when I did nothing wrong everyone is so focused on her being treated wrong.

[NicholasHalden]

She seems to be or try to be the "starlet" so she is instigating the drama between you and your ex knowing full well the repercussions and actions of your ex towards you. She's a leech. I would never talk to either. Drama is never good when all it does is give her and him massive angry apology sex.

[Jerseystarlet]

I can take responsibility for my actions I guess deep down I was hoping she would be the bigger person and leave it alone then she didn't even after I apologized and liked my pics a month later. I was a good girlfriend I never cheated just loved him and what reason he is with his is not me to figure out or understand why he's with her. It's just hard sometimes but I know one day I won't care anymore and none of this will matter. But at least I know what not to do in the future with drama like this

[NicholasHalden]

That's all that matters now. You have gained insight into avoiding problems like this. She is not honorable. Her actions are just drama that she wanted. Forget her now and your ex boyfriend. Think of it as nothing but a bad lunch with them like when "friends" leave you with a bill is they look the other way. New day, new journey and new people. "exivit de malum relationes in nova fata" as my grand-da once said. It means the exit of an evil relationship into a new destiny in latin.

[NicholasHalden]

*as they look

[Jerseystarlet]

Thanks! Well put, I appreciate it

[justme20]

insecure female. she knows you are his ex and have a past history and se wants to make sure you are no competetion. going through this right now with my ex. some crazy girl is spreading lies and getting in our business because she was turned down. welcome to life girl lol

[Jerseystarlet]

Aww that's horrible girls are dumb sometimes I hope it gets resolved he's stupid for leaving you for a insecure bratt

[justme20]

this little brat is 30 years old lmao. I think its time for her to grow up and stop acting like she is 12 years old

[Lett0385]

I think that you started the problem by posting a picture of now someone elses BF, and in my opinion it is disrespectful, you brought the problem by doing so, now deal with it. You knew you were gonna get a reaction from her by doing this, so why are you backing up now.

[Jerseystarlet]

because it's my picture and I posted over a month after things were said between us so she should not be looking up my account. It's just a picture it's not like I came to his house naked trying to sleep with the guy. She should only see it as pathetic that all I have left is pic. She should of left it alone knowing a silly pic was no threat to her and MY ex. I'm grieving and posting pics are my issue but if that's all I'm doing she needs to ignore the haters aka me.

[Jerseystarlet]

was what I did immature absoulutely but I'm the one who got dumped what's her excuse she has my ex if she trusts him and he's not confronting anybody he's keeping quiet about this whole issue she needs to stop taking matters into her own hands when it's not her issue. I never attacked her I have no beef with her my issue is with my ex and even before that pic was posted she started keeping tabs on me between her and friends to me that doesn't show she trusts him or she would have left me alone.

[Jerseystarlet]

I would have been nice* Just because someone has a harder time getting up that you or someone else doesn't mean they are weak they just had a harder fall. I want to get up I don't like feeling like this and each day gets a little better than the the last. I'll be fine but somethings you can't just GET OVER

[Wolfnala]

Regardless of who got who, you still posted her boyfriend. Especially since it’s a photo of when you two dated, she has the right of being mad. That’s her boyfriend and that’s your ex.

[benzelizabeth]

He must talk about you a lot , Or she is very insecure..

[Jerseystarlet]

I'm gonna go with insecure because how can someone casually bring up their ex in conversation unless they say "i have this friend who" ... I don't know she said she never heard of me until I asked him to block me so she's probably regretting never asking about his past or how long ago his last relationship was since his last relationship was either during ours or a week after which still not a lot of time post break up lol

[benzelizabeth]

My ex never shut up about his ex. He got me by talking about how crazy she was. I am sure that's what he is saying about me to his new girl.

[Jerseystarlet]

I hate when guys do that and I hate girls who only take their side when there are three sides to every story his hers and the truth. Guys who make the ex seem like she was psycho normally she did nothing wrong hell guys think crying over something silly is weird so God forbid she reacts to a breakup she is considered insane. Even after telling this girl my side of the story she still seemed so sure that he won't do the same to her . I feel you need to know their past and how long ago it was

[benzelizabeth]

Yup, I took what he said about his ex before me with a grain of salt, guess he didn't like that to much,lol . His new girl is kinda happy he left me for her, she new we were arquing but still togather, He never even broke it off with me either,I noticed he was making comments on her Facebook page so I looked at her wall,BAM she posted a pic of them two with the caption "my boyfriend" I texted him about it, we said hurtfull words,then haven't talked since.

[Jerseystarlet]

such a jerk why do guys act so rude and nasty when they are the ones who moved on you did nothing wrong for all you knew you two were fine and he is treating you like you slept with his best friend and forced him to be with someone else. um no if you want to leave, leave but don't treat me like I was never there for you and loved you unconditionally. I hope both our exes regret what they did so we can say I told you so lol

[benzelizabeth]

Hell yeah! I keep hoping for it. He didn't accept her relashionship status on Facebook until 8 days later and only after I blocked him. It's only been a month and when the honeymoon stage is over I hope she sees him for what he is. It's nice talking to someone else about all this.;)

[Jerseystarlet]

I think it helps the process of moving on especially when you know they're not blocking you out because they're tired of hearing about it. You can talk to me about this forever I totally understand your situation. You're not alone

[benzelizabeth]

neither are you. :) feel free to hit me up anytime.

[Jerseystarlet]

aww thanks chica

[prettymuscle]

just block this guy and be done lol. why is that so hard for you

[Jerseystarlet]

Dude he is blocked everyone is blocked I just wanted to know. You don't have to be a jerk about it

[benzelizabeth]

I am doing the same thing as the question asker. I can't forget my ex even tho he left me for another girl. I still love him and don't know why

[Jerseystarlet]

@benzelizabeth I don't know why I still love my ex either but at the same time I know it sounds twilightly, but the pain makes it more real that I wasn't just infatuated with the bubbly feelings and tingles I saw passed the hurt but he had a choice and he chose to be with her and it's not my job to wonder why or compete I'll always care for him but if all I have with him is the pain it's not worth sticking around when he isn't.

[benzelizabeth]

Very true. I just hold onto the hope that as time goes on I will stop thinking of him so much, I don't try to talk to him or anything I have looked at his fb ,but get hurt worse by seeing his post to her. I just get curiose I guess? not healthy .

[Jerseystarlet]

yea that's exactly why I asked him to block me because I can easily unblock myself and he made his accounts private in case I made a new one which I appreciate a part of me is mad he really did it but it would hurt worse to see pics and post I shouldn't be seeing. It's just so weird when one minute he's all about you and out of nowhere he's supposedly in love with someone you feel doesn't know or care for him like you do. Sometimes I just wish we could redo it all but but he messed up bad

[benzelizabeth]

Exactly! Good to know I'm not the only one in this situatioin. I was begining to think I was nuts! He messed up, he hurt me,I should be able to just hate him?right?

[Jerseystarlet]

no you'e not nuts its just one of those situations that no one really understand until it happens to them but until today I felt so alone in this situation I got tired of talking about to my friends and family and I knew they were tired of hearing it but Its just really hard ya know I can't just wake up and be fine as hard as I try it's gonna take some time

[prettymuscle]

For the question asker I wasn't being a jerk but more on point and real. cause you feel this way because in your mine you feel you will be alone and that no guys wants you but only for sex. You need to get over that and fine someone eles and stop crying. The same thing goes for Benzelisabeth

[Jerseystarlet]

that's not how I feel. what are you talking about I don't feel no other guy will ever want me. I'm just going through a tough time will I get over it yes I always do this is just harder probably because I really need to learn something from all of this but I don't feel I'll be alone honey don't flatter yourself that you know what you're talking about. I'm already talking to someone but taking it slow because I don't want it to be a rebound. I'm hurt not damaged

[Jerseystarlet]

and not to be a jerk or a bitch don't speak for Benzelisabeth you don't know her situation either and she's gonna be okay and can get any guys she wants excuse us for being HUMAN

[benzelizabeth]

@ prettymuscle Have you ever been in this situation? I understand and appreciate your point of veiw.

[prettymuscle]

This new guy is a rebound because if he wasn't then you wouldn't be talking about your ex and how tough of a time that your having. If the new guy was an rebound your ex would be a forgotten memory never to speak of. Plus hurt is the same thing as damaged and for Benzelizabeth I thank you for liking my point of view and understanding it unlike the question asker.

[Jerseystarlet]

because you're being rude instead of understanding I'm not romantically involved with this new guy right now he's in the friend-zone because I don't want to feel I'm using him to get over my ex all I'm doing is talking to him and getting to know him its way to soon to be in a relationship right now and it's not fair to him plus he just got out of a relationship too so I really need to take my time.I just don't appreciate your GET OVER IT attitude I wouldn't have been nicer if you were the asker

[prettymuscle]

You are using him because he is in the friendzone. When women but guys in the friendzone its because they need a shoulder to cry and they constantly talk about there problems. I bet you talk to him about your ex all the time. its not good to use the rebound guy as a therapist

[Jerseystarlet]

i have never talked about my ex to him honestly when I'm with him I'm having such a great time I don't even think about my ex the only time I think about this crap is when I'm home when I'm working or with friends my minds not on it. you don't know what you're talking about stop talking to me like you know everything. You're so mean

[Jerseystarlet]

i've had guys talk about their ex to me when we were one dates so I would never do that to someone else I like him and would like something to happen one day so why would I use him as a shoulder to cry on. I just want to be friends with the guy I don't know what I want right now it's too early regardless of what happened or not I'm not rushing into anything

[prettymuscle]

How can you like someone but put them in the friendzone cause that doesn't really match up or go together

[Jerseystarlet]

What do you want me to do @prettymuscle? Would you rather me just rush into something or take my time? I'm over talking about this and am having a hard time how you don't understand what I'm trying to say. I really like this guy but it's really important to get to know him first. I do that with everyone. It's called being smart. I'm not putting him the friend-zone that implies I only see him as a friend and he'll only be a friend I'm just saying I barely know him so I'm not gonna rush it okay

[Jerseystarlet]

I don't want to keep arguing and debating this with you I just don't want you talking to me like you know me or my situation and at the same time you have no compasation for me being human. You don't seem like this horrible person just very strong willed but I think I'm not doing anything wrong. I have accepted I need to move on I stopped contacting everyone and I'm talking to someone else but I'm not rushing into it and I'm taking it slow . What's the problem here?

[prettymuscle]

Well there is no problem am just confirming that you need to move on. But there is one mistake that you are missing and that is your statement on me not know you and your situation. All women are the same and no percent less.

[Jerseystarlet]

kk

[prettymuscle]

so your kk reponses means that you agree then that am right. I like how you think

[Anonymous]

Insecurity.