10 Tips For Dating A Feminist (Page 4)
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My dating advice is to not date anyone who openly identifies as a feminist. Sorry girls, but your views are not about equality anymore. That ship has sailed.
These tips are shit. I mean, I like to laugh, make a joke, I don't give a fuck. I like to pay my bills, we had dinner, cool, I'll pay what I ate. As long as you don't treat me as a maid, I'm okay. I don't care how you treat your mom. Be a gentleman, or be just you, I don't want you to show the nice side and then the real you, I want you to be yourself.
Guys, please stop thinking feminist girls are crazy bitches. We just hate injustice.
Well, the problem is they brought that on themselves. To be fair, it's *probably* a very vocal minority on sites like tumblr who openly engage in what is pretty much pro-fem, anti-male discourse. There is nothing wrong with feminism on its own, but when it's taken to extremes then the only thing that separates extreme feminists from terrorists is that they don't go out and bomb typical male hotspots. Yeah, I know I'm being dramatic, but so are they.
Fighting for equality is fighting for the good and for the bad. If women want to be equal to men then they gotta have to accept that not everything men do is 'privileged' or even fun. But all too often I see women who only want equal rights when it benefits them, not when it doesn't. It's an asinine level op hypocrisy.
My dad dated a feminazi back in the hayday of the 70's. She bragged one time she had burned her bra at a rally one time.
He said, "Wasn't much of a fire, was it?"
That was the end of that. That woman is now my mother.
You need to read through these comments again Anonymous 18-24 year old expert... Feminism hasn't been about equal rights for a very long time now. Yes, women are oppressed... in other countries... But until they rise up and demand change, change will never come... I think we should ship all the feminazis over to the Middle East, or North Africa, where their ministrations would still have some meaning and some some merit...
Oops... Posted to the wrong thread... Disregard...
I'm a feminist and I find most of this to be accurate except for the sexist jokes part. I actually would find them funny as long as both parties are willing to dish it out and take it.
Not surprised a male already down voted this. Guess my belief in gender equality is too radical.
P. s. For those about to say "feminism is women over men" or "it's not gender equality" or something along those lines, I define MY feminism as gender equality so you can kindly go take that argument elsewhere.
No its because they all preach like this but act in a completely opposite way.
I asked her out. I pay
Simple, its called common courtesy, but since she was a feminist, I felt disrespected that she kept pushing to pay for herself.
We had 3 dates by the way, that's why I said never again.
Women already havr gender equality in the western world. Feminism has turned from a movement with clear defined principles to the emasculation of men
I won't put up with that.
Why this argument isn't reasonable:
1. Oftentimes, men boil down the argument to paying for the bill. Hate to break it to you, but in the long run that is not important. We can't keep thinking in terms of western cultures. In the majority of the world, women do not have any sort of gender equality. Not to mention, throughout science and history, girls practically exclusively hear about men in everything. Why? Because women weren't allowed to get an education, have a job, etc. Even though this isn't a problem in the DEVELOPED world anymore, there is a psychological concept called stereotype threat, meaning that if you are expected to be less capable of doing something then you will automatically perform at a lesser ability even if you were originally not going to. Gender equality is not exclusive to who pays for the bill. Ironically enough, many feminists feel the need to offer to pay the bill because if they don't, they get crap for utilizing gender inequality to their advantage.
Feminists have actively given shit to my mother, the women that brought me into this world, because she chose to work AND run a household.
It wasn't my father's fault that his job required him to travel a lot when I was younger.
My mom is all for gender equality and wants all feminists to burn in hell
Keep talking, my point was more than just paying the bill
Feminism isn't about emasculating men. It never has been. It is about letting people do whatever they want without having to worry about gender roles. If men want to put on makeup, then they should be able to without being judged. If men want to traditionally feel masculine by watching sports, drinking beer, and going to the gym, then hey, why not? Feminists who have the true idea of what is feminism do not try to emasculate men. They try to make it so that everyone is comfortable in whatever place they fall and people actually won't be confined by ridiculous gender expectations for once.
I'm a feminist and if a women wants to work in a household and be a stay at home mom, then that's her right. It's what she wants to do. Women have the right to decide whatever they want to do and that's what I'm trying to say.
She's probably just more just comfortable paying for herself. Why don't you try reversing the roles? Would you feel comfortable if she kept insisting to pay for both of you?
And we still don't have gender equality. Sure men and women have the same rights now. But there are still a lot of gender stereotypes affecting us.
And feminism is a movement for both men and women. It's not one that emasculates men. It's one that makes sure men don't feel feminine for doing something that women usually do. Educate yourself before you make a comment
I have educated myself. Living in the progressive capital of the united states, (Madison, WI) has taught me that everything is "be tolerant of me or else!"I have been given shit for my traditional values and beliefs, that a mans role is to be a protector and a provider. It has nothing to do with " acting manly" (eg your sports example) its has to do with stripping away what makes a man a man.
I was raised to be a protector and provider for my future wife, something that has been stripped away from me because of "equality", and no I don't mean voting, jobs, education, I mean the attitude.
By every single feminist, including you, I am the bad guy because I am a man. If you think its all about dates, wearing makeup, doing things women normally do you clearly have no idea what you're talking about.
21st century feminism in the western world is slowly destroying a mans purpose and pride.
I agree with most of it except: "She won't automatically assume that you've got the bill, but you should at least offer." I don't see why the male ought to offer to for everything, even if they end up bill splitting. I just suggest splitting the bill to start with, I don't see why being male means I should offer to pay for all of it, which seems to be what the take owner was encouraging. Otherwise agree more or less.
Have an up vote for balance...
I've been in martial arts since I was a kid, to deal with my confidence and bully problems. I know how to fight and protect, something every man needs yo know. I encourage women to join as well.
Yet when I bring it up with women, they run away, saying "how can you enjoy something so violent?" I then tell them I also know how to ballroom dance, and their tune changes, yet despite they always walk away thinking "loser" I know that because I pick up on every single bit of body language. One of the benefits of being a linguist, you learn about spoken and in spoken communication.
Point is, I take pride in being a man with martial arts, yet women have given me shit and called me "overcompensating"
Until I save their asses from a man that's been forcing himself on her, when clearly they don't like it.
And after that, they give me more shit.
Its amazing, feninsts when their men feminized unless they feel in danger
Good luck with that.
It was a mistake commenting on this, could have spent
My time better
If you're gonna argue based on assumptions, I'm not even gonna bother. Bye
@ClariceOwen23
I don't know if you're talking to me or someone else, but literally an argument is based on assumptions.
When arguing, you assume things. Given x, then y
"By every single feminist, including you, I am the bad guy because I am a man."
Well I never actually said or implied that
@PT1911
Perhaps she expects a sound argument and not merely a valid one.
@Bysshe
All I have done was talk about my experiences with feminists, which have been extremely negative, not only insulting myself, but my mother-the woman they claim to be fighting for-and my father-the man that taught me how to be a man.,
So no, I'm not buying anything they say
There have been some good points by the guys that are getting down voted by women so this kind of goes both ways. There are sexist people on both sides of the picket line. Plus there are other parts of this take that others have noted are not very good if you deeply think about them so they might be down voting because you said that it's accurate and you only excluded the part about sexist jokes. You shouldn't care about up or down voting it's a stupid system.
@PT1911 her arguments sound much more valid than yours. I'm not a feminist at all, but you sound really sexist. This site really is filled with stupid people, but you're on an entirely different level.
I laughed when I saw the the split the bill reason. Why can't she pay for the whole thing? I mean she wants all these rights? Or no? Feminists only want rights when it suits them
I personally like taking turns paying for dates. Like if he pays for the first then I'll pay for the second, etc.
Okay good for you
But she is making it seem like men are the ones who have to pay the bill. A lot of feminists think that way
What man in his right mind wants to date a feminist? LOL at "you should at least offer to pay the bill", because he's a man? That isn't sexist at all. Jesus Christ...
lol wow it is called chivalry ever heard of it?
@Eiffelgirl21 - yes I've heard of it, but chivalry and gender equality don't mix - it's hypocritical to say that you want to be treated completely equally and complain about gendered expectations then say you expect a man to do this because he's a man.
well yeah I agree with that lol this whole article is hypocritical
@Eiffelgirl21 - then they wonder why feminism is a dirty word nowadays
yeah I am not for feminism, they are ruining our world.
Wow...@Eiffelgirl21 - Its called, I paid for the last 3,241,542 dates... How about YOU pick one up for a change?
@Guy2345
who said I never have? lol it is called chivalry. if you are a gentlemen you would gladly pay for the tab. at least the first time. I don't expect it. But, it is always nice.
These are all good points but I'm sorry there are just some girls who seriously are nothing but an arrogant bitch and YES she has an attitude. Being "assertive" and "strong" is different than having a fucking ego. If you are going to be assertive then like everyone else I expect you to have a rational argument behind it and we can discuss the problem intelligently and not have you derail it into a fucking emotional shouting fight.
That is what a bitch with an attitude does.
Thats a different topic entirely
@bang678 no it's completely related because I have seen countless bitches use those points to justify their shitty attitude and behavior. So it's important to distinguish strength and assertiveness from just being a stubborn bitch.
The reason for this post was to get more guys to date feminist.
Her relationships must end really quick to want those qualities in us.
Women can be twice as hurtful than men when it comes to communication and advantages. Most men can only cause you physical harm rather than emotional harm.
Oh god dating isn't fun anymore. Soon as you talk to a woman it feels like you're walking on egg shells.
I am a feminist. I don't want to be with a man who thinks my feminism makes me a bad person.
Cute list. A little over-simplified, but cute all the same.
The better idea is t just not date these people at all. It's work. Who wants to be on "support call" 24/7?
A mature woman can handle her shit, won't tag you in, and actually manages her life without any of this convoluted bullshit.
You think a feminist woman will be less independent?
I know anyone who hides behind a title for their "power" is less independent. A woman who doesn't need a label to do what she had to do is probably the strongest woman you'll ever meet. Everyone else is a waste of skin on some BS political rant for pseudo-intellectual goals.
I agree. A woman running around calling herself a feminist, is like a man running around calling himself an alpha male. People that are really strong and independent don't need run around calling themselves strong and independent all the time.
I will never date a feminist. Weak women use the disguise of being "Strong" as an excuse to remain independent of a man. News flash women, wen we want a woman, we want all of her. If you are too scared/weak ten we don't want you.
So you're saying women have to be dependent on men?
Only if you want all of our hearts.
Be independent of us, be aloof, but do not expect us to love you.
I think there is just one rule necessary.
Don't date a feminist. Not going to entertain a narrassitic insecure gender sensitive individual. Just too much drama in that mess.
Then you're experiencing women who claim to be feminist but really aren't
They seem to be the only kind of women that claim to be feminists.
I'm all about female empowerment and equality. Not this male shaming BS though.
A feminist supporting the idea that a men SHOULD offer to pay the bill on the first date.. what a joke.
This was a good article. I believe in gender equality if everything truly is equal. In a relationship people must split everything. Especially at our age.
Thanks but I will not be dating a feminist. Full of double standards.
"Treat me like an equal but I want you to offer to pay and act like a gentleman even though that's not really showing equality."
This...
"feminist" is a red flag, i hear that word and I'd probably be like "thinks for everything" n run far, far, away
I'd rather drag my nuts on broken glass than date a feminist. Come to think of it, the two aren't that dissimilar.
Most of the things on these list should be for dating a girl in general.
this*
this is a bit immature really
besides, don't give them any tips, feminista are not some kind of weird animals.
damn...
They aren't some kind of weird animals? Prove it.
Yes just treat us with respect, what kind of bullshit is this.
I rather date a hillbilly then a femenist no man bad or good deserves something as low as a feminist.