How to Reject a Guy Without Hurting His Feelings

[Anonymous]

So, you're walking through campus, waiting for your next class, chilling at the mall, wherever. You make eye contact with a male who's fast approaching. You immediately know what he's looking for. The illusive phone number. Maybe he's not your type, or maybe you're just not in a place in life where you can handle a relationship. So, you already know in your head that you're going to turn him down. But you also know that guys are actually pretty sensitive beings and you don't want to crush his ego or hurt his feelings by saying "Nope." Well girlfriend, here's a few things to say (and a few bonus of what NOT to say) in this situation where no one gets hurt and you don't have to give him your number. Read on. (These have been approved by my guy friends)

1. Tell him "I'm really sorry, but my mom says I'm not allowed to give boys my number" or "I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to date."

These work every time because in his mind he's like "hm yeah I don't want to get involved with something like this anyway" "She must be underage" and it also doesn't make him feel rejected because there's the possibility in his mind that you "would've if you could've"

2. "I don't give out my number to people but you can have my email and we can chat there."

Guys will immediately cringe and be like nah.

3. Put on a really annoying fake voice and yes, talk valley girl.

He will back off faster than a speeding bullet. The whole point is to make him think it was his idea not to pursue you, so you don't have to deal with him and he doesn't feel rejected. You've gotta do whatchu gotta do...

4. Use a guy friend to lean on.

If you see that interested fellow on his way, lean on/playfully touch/hold hands with your platonic guy friend. He will swing a U-turn and be on his way. WARNING (Make sure u ok it with your guy friend before hand or things could get weird)

5. Bathroom break!

You see him coming, it's time for you to GET OUT. Run stand in the ladies room for a few mins till he moves on his way. Unless he waits for you, in that case enlist the help of a friend to divert attention from the bathroom door so you can escape.

6. Phone call!!!

Your phone is buzzing, right? No? Doesn't matter. Pick it up and start having a one way conversation with your phone. If he waits, OH NO! The call is important. Time to go find some privacy...

Now here's what you shouldn't do...

1. Don't give him a fake number.

That's just mean. He will figure out you played him when he texts the number and some random dude responds. That hurts.

[OlderAndWiser]

7. I only date women.

8. I'm engaged.

9. "I really appreciate your interest and I wish I could but I have some physical problems and I could never satisfy a guy."

10. "I'm waiting for my dad. You'll need to ask him before I can give you my number."

11. "I'm sorry. It's not your fault, but you look just like a guy that molested me at a party last year after he slipped me a roofie."

[BrittBratt2416]

Just say no thanks.. simple, you don't have to be so extra about it. lol All you have to do is say " Thank you but I'm not interested". Why is that so hard to say?
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[btbc92]

"These work every time because in his mind he's like "hm yeah I don't want to get involved with something like this anyway" "She must be underage" and it also doesn't make him feel rejected because there's the possibility in his mind that you "would've if you could've". Not true at all. They will get pissed and claim why are you listening to your parents, blah, blah. I had this done to me multiple times. They don't care. It is the special few who would respect you. But not because you're underage, but because you're listening to somebody who that person doesn't respect as the authority figure of your life. Especially mainly if you live with them and you're under 18.

No. I'm sorry, everything that you're saying is very immature, and that is enough to make any guy not want to date you while they rumor about you to the guys you are interested in. You are still going to hurt them regardless if they really like you. If they act like jerkwads then you don't owe them an answer. The answer is still a no. Be real and honest with them, even if brutally honest if must. But if you want to be friends with them, be real and honest about it. If they don't, then you know the real reason why they want to be with you.

[Canuck37]

As a guy, I think some of these are terrible ideas. I've also had girls reject me in terrible ways.

If you want to reject me without hurting my feelings, this is what you must do:

1) Be clear. Don't hide, don't run away, don't ignore me. I will keep approaching you until I do get the opportunity to ask you out, so hiding just prolongs the inevitable; you'll be wasting his time, and you'll be wasting your time. What you should do, is walk right up to me when I approach, and tell me that you're not interested in dating me.

2) Reaffirm me. Find something you appreciate about me, and let me know that I still have value in your eyes, even if it's not as a romantic partner. Some of my best friends are girls who rejected me in a kind way, which then turned into a platonic friendship.

3) Don't lie. If I asked you out, I probably already asked your friends if you're dating. If you are dating someone already, I won't ask you out. If you are not dating and say that you are, I'm going to be offended that you couldn't tell me the truth.

If you're clear enough, the guy won't ever ask you out again; and if you're kind enough, you'll have done it without him hating you.

[Anonymous]

In all honestly if it is a random guy who is approaching you who you don't even know try to be polite but really any form of no works. Those types of guys are going up to every girl they see doing that. It's a numbers game to them. THey should be use to getting rejected by now. If it is a guy who you do know though odds are it took him a lot of courage to approach you like that so try to be nice about. Be honest about why you don't want to go on a date because he probably will be able to tell if you are making up an excuse and he will probably be because of something else (something wrong with him) and it will hurt even more. Also this is a big one and a must. Make sure you make it clear you aren't into him and won't be. The worst rejections I ever got was when the girl wouldn't gibe me a direct no. She would turn me down still but would still make it seem like I have a chance if I try again later. At that point I was getting lead along by a girl who wasn't into me but wouldn't tell me straight up. Made me keep chasing her and asking her out till I finally just broke and couldn't put myself through that torture anymore. Pretty sure she just wanted to keep me around as a confidence boost. Wasted a lot of time on her.

[TheLuckyPizzaDog]

Hand him one of the pamphlets those Christians hand out randomly. See how fast he runs.

Tbh tho, you don't need to worry about hurting a dudes feelings because you said no. If the guy had two brain cells to rub together, he'd understand. He took a risk asking you, you said no, welp gg dude, time to move on. If he gets upset - that's not your problem. Who tf gets upset when a girl says no to giving a stranger her phone number. Shit, if i asked a random dude for his number and he said no, i wouldn't be upset. It would make sense.

Actually, i think if a girl gives a random stranger in a mall her personal number, no questions asked... that would be weirder.

[Dio1982]

Being a man means facing and coping with relentless rejection. Don't worry about him. The courteous thing to do is to save everybody's time and to be quick to the point:

"Sorry not interested"
"I'll never want a relationship with you"
"I do not find you attractive"
"I'll never sleep with you"

[troychapman]

thats horrible

[zagor]

"No, sorry" would be much better than any of these.

[Vyxzuw]

The effort you should put into rejecting a guy should reflect the effort he put into getting to know you.

A guy just walks up and asks for your number? Just say, no thanks.
He didn't put any effort in, why should you?

A guy that's been chatting with you for weeks finally decides to ask you out, well, time to let him down gently.

A guy is being a jerk and doesn't respect you saying no, then time to break out the snarky gun and let him have it.

[pretty-kitty]

I read this because I thought it may be an interesting article but instead it turned out to be something that sounds like a 14 year old wrote it.

The only good point you made was to not give out a fake number, other than that the others are ridiculous. This is so immature, just be upfront and tell him you're not interested in him or in dating.

Just tell the truth!!!

[notallthere98]

I find this kinda sad. Like yeah, you don't have to be rude, but guys should just respect a simple "Sorry, I'm not interested". Women shouldn't have to come up with these elaborate ways to get out of giving you their number. You approached someone asking for personal contact info, you need to be ready to hear the word "No" without taking it as a blow to your ego.

[lovelyhoneybones]

Rejection is going to hurt no matter what, it's best to just tell him the truth. If you lie, some guys will keep coming back and annoying you. Just get it over the first time.

[Chief16]

That was pathetic, even dogs reject better than that.
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[troychapman]

this is actually good a few could backfire though like 3 and 5 if he sees you run as he aproaches he will either think that your scared of him or he will know its a rejection method with option 3 he could be weird like he either thinks your really into him in which case you have just sped up the advancement of him aproaching you to stage 2 or he could be into that in which cases he likes you even more so it will be confusing if you make up an excuse as he thinks he's making progress.

[404filenotfound]

So pretty much lie and avoid the situation so that you don't have to be assertive?

Not great advice, sorry.

[xAvalanche]

Just tell him you're not interested. Doing all that shit and not telling him the truth will hurt his feelings.

[cth96190]

When girls said to me 'fuck off, you freak' that usually worked pretty well.
Australian females tend to be more direct than most.
Now that I am in an age demographic in which males have the upper hand, I am much kinder toward the women whom I reject.

[Barrabus_the_Free]

You shouldn't be. You should twist the knife as hard as you can.

I've got buddies from Australia, and I've gotten along well with every Aussie bloke I've met. You guys got a bum deal every which way. American women are horrible, but Aussie twats are so much worse, and the laws suck worse for men too.

[Wolframium]

I would go with mail. Actually, it would be preferred. Mail is better than SMS.
During that fake phone call, what if your phone actually start ringing? :-D Seriously.
OK. I would like to add something on this list. It would be, of course, the illusive number 0: just tell him, that you are not interested of anything. Plain, honest, simple. Don’t explain anything else, if you don’t want. Be direct, don’t play this…game, don’t give hints.

[Vyxzuw]

Yeah, I'd prefer e-mail also.
Gives me the chance to craft it correctly instead of stumbling through asking someone out over a phone call.

[Wolframium]

@Vyxzuw Yeah, exactly. It's better.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the rest of the gag-ers. He will see right through your lying and feel worse that you couldnt be straight up and tell him you're just not interested. I've done a few of these before and it didn't ward off the guy until I told him no. They'd tell me you should've just said that the first time rather than come up with some excuse or lie. Rejection is always going to hurt, no matter what. He'll live through it.

[Nivinxus]

Or you can just say you aren't interested. These guys aren't children, they are adults and you might as well treat them like adults. A few words isn't going to scar them for life.

[Robertinho]

Well said... its a darn shame they want us to be men, yet treat us like children.

[JohnDoe3000]

More like "How to Reject a Guy With Bullshit Lies He'll See Right Through And Let Him Know You Don't Respect Him As A Person Enough To Tell Him The Truth".

[Marinepilot]

Sarah-You're very wrong. He doesn't owe her friendship. She doesn't have to date him. I know that it's proper to walk away and not have contact when you've been rejected. Your remark is what I'd expect out little smart ass twerps like you. The Humane Society has plenty of cats. You're going to need them.

[Cosytoasty]

How old are you, 12 ... ?

It can't be THAT difficult to say "No sorry".

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Thank you.