Knowing Your Brain On Love
Relationships that tend to last are between people with common interests; especially if the sex isn't even happening. You said he's 40, so one possibility is the struggle men face when confronting ED issues. Men are as insecure as women with their body image when it comes to this topic. He may be uncomfortable discussing it because you're not the one; otherwise, he would allow himself to be vulnerable with you.
You stated "we are polar opposites on the emotional spectrum," so I believe you answered your own question regarding the main reason the relationship ended. If you're not emotionally compatible with no common interests, lack of progression in sexual intimacy, and he's ghosted you are all signs he's not putting your feelings first. He may feel it's better to not say anything instead of telling you the truth because he's sparing your feelings. Either way it's a cop out! He's taken the easy way out and avoiding confrontation which is not showing you enough respect to have your say and some closure. That's the worst! He needs to grow the f*** up; I mean a teddy bear picture! Really?
Realize you are worthy of a man who shows you the love you deserve without having to ask for it. Move on. Do not contact him again. Delete the conversations and block his number so you are not tempted to fall back into his charm. Karma. What goes around comes around. If you allow him to continue to mess with your mind and keep trying to figure out why he did this or what you did wrong, it will not allow you to move on. Try writing everything out that you want to say, but do not send it. This act allows the mind to process everything. He's not the one. If a man is into a woman, he will desire her mind, body and soul and she will not have to question it.
The real lesson for anyone to learn is how you react to rejection. What's best for you is acknowledging relationships don't work out for several reasons, but in the end it doesn't mean you need to change yourself. There is no right or wrong way to be relationship material. Just be you. Quirky, promiscuous, high-maintenance, depressed, opinionated, confident, problem-solver, intuitive are traits people focus on how to be or not to be in order to be successful in love. When the reality is people that share the same personality traits, good or bad, understand one another.
Commonality with like minded individuals is the key to any successful relationship. Which is why there are so many books offering ways to reach your plateau of self-actualization. Knowing who you are and being comfortable in your skin shows growth. All any person with or without a partner should be focusing on is growing every day. There's no need to make excuses for behavior when we all MUST accept each other as we are. Forgive for your own mental health.
Remain open for love when it arrives. Vulnerability by definition is misleading. Who wants to be open to emotional and physical attack? I argue it is the one necessary part of loving relationships. It’s what allows for mutual trust to fully develop, however, this is only the case when both parties allow themselves to be vulnerable to the other.
My final piece of advice: Don’t Frame Choices as Right or Wrong.
Value judgments can be hard on our relationships. No one likes to feel criticized. That can be hard when you feel passionate about a topic. You should always try to express understanding for the other person’s point of view during the conversation. Before you feel the need to one up someone's response in this forum or in dealings with your partner, friend, family member, or coworker I ask you to please consider this, If what you have to say will alter your path or any of the receivers of your message for the better, then proceed with confidence that it must be said aloud. Is being right more important than allowing another to save face when it's not life altering? Human decency will not cause others any added stress.